Page 158 of Until I Own You

“To you,” he says.

Our eyes lock. “May I add something?”

He nods once. “I’ll permit it.”

I giggle, but once my giggle fades, I lift my chin and breathe in deep. “To us.”

Seth grins, then clinks his glass against mine.

Conversation over our luxurious dinner is…well, it’s like a first date. There are pauses and blushes and questions we’ve never asked one another.

Doors have been unlocked the past couple of months, doors neither of us dared peer through.

Seth talks about his childhood, even refers to his dad a few times without getting choked up.

I tell him about life with my dad growing up. All the adventures we had, how hard he worked to make up for my mom’s absence.

We talk about lots of things…but not a lot about us. And for some reason, that feels right. All Seth and I have discussed before is us. Our dynamic, our feelings, our wants, our needs.

The seal on our vacuum has been broken. Our friends know we’re here tonight. So do our parents. A relationship can’t just exist on what’s between two people. It has to include the world beyond it as well. That means memories and feelings and plans, hopes, dreams…

By dessert, I am more head over heels in love with him if that is even possible.

To talk…just talk, feels like such a gift.

When after dinner espresso is delivered to our table, Seth makes sure to put several cubes of sugar in mine. It’s the little things that make me swoon.

“I’d like the night to continue.” He appraises me through the steam of his coffee. “Would you?”

I cock my head to the side. “If you would like the night to continue, I would like the night to continue.”

Seth hesitates, then puts his cup down without taking a sip. He slides his hand across the table for me to take.

Though I’m confused, I do so.

“Bridget, listen to me carefully,” he says in a low voice he’s always saved for the Underground or the bedroom.

Out here, it seems serious. Captures my attention. My unease.

His hand tightens around mine. “We need to talk about what happened at the club.”

Time slows. I try to smile. “You were there. You know what happened.”

He shakes his head in a curt way. “That’s not what I mean.”

I swallow. “Th-then what?”

Seth engulfs my one hand with his two.

Blue eyes laser into mine so hard I have to look away. It’s too intense.

My heart is starting to race.

“Have you discussed it in therapy?”

“Yes.” I’ve had a standing therapy session every week since I returned to New York when I was twenty years old. I’ve doubled those sessions since the incident at the club.

“You are my sub,” he says with gentleness. “I collared you. You have given me your trust. Your control.”

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