Page 110 of Love for a Lifetime

“You had training wheels until you were almost eight. You were the worst driver I’ve ever seen.”

That honesty earned him a true laugh. Olivia tilted her head back and let the sound bubble out of her. “I’ve been told that a time or two.”

“Your mom used to tell me and Beau all the time to prepare ourselves because we’d be driving you around for half our lives.”

“And she was right. I didn’t pass my driver’s test until I was almost seventeen.”

“But you’re a decent driver now.”

“I’m better than a decent driver,” she said, lifting her chin at his little jab.

“I think I recall pulling you over last month for speeding in a school zone.”

Her smile faded, and he watched as the light dimmed in her eyes. “Do you remember when we used to race on our bikes?”

“Yeah.”

Olivia lifted Dawson’s hand and pressed her palm to his, studying the way his hand engulfed her small one. “I think I’ve loved you since then–when you used to let me have a head start.”

The word love reached out and punched him in the chest. He’d loved Olivia so long she had seeped into his skin and threaded herself into his atoms.

But he’d always assumed she was slower to warm up to the idea. His love had been a constant while hers was a seed that had barely broken ground.

At least, that’s what he’d assumed.

“What are you talking about?” he asked.

“We would line up and you would say ‘go,’ but you never started when I did. You let me get ahead.”

He remembered that. It wasn’t anything he’d made a conscious decision to do, but he’d started holding Beau back to let her have a chance.

“A lot of good it did. Beau always jumped off the starting line and flew past you like a slingshot.”

“But that didn’t matter. I didn’t even realize you were giving me a head start until years later. Do you have any idea how much that meant to me?”

He didn’t. He hadn’t even thought about it. Now, she’d brought him face-to-face with the memory, and love for the little girl she’d been welled up inside him. As much as he’d love a son to fish and hunt with, having a little girl who looked just like Olivia would absolutely overwhelm him.

She brushed a hair behind her ear before returning her hand to his. “I want you to know that this hasn’t been one-sided. I’ve been terrified of loving you for a long time. It’s taking some time to get used to…acting on it.”

“I’m not rushing you. If it sounds like I’m moving too fast, just tell me.”

Olivia shook her head. “It’s not that. I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow, and…it’s probably not going to go well. I haven’t told you about it. Only a handful of people know.”

The extra second it took him to respond jammed in his throat. He didn’t want to push her to share something with him that she didn’t want to, but knowing others knew things about her that he didn’t was like a sucker punch.

“Why wouldn’t it go well? Are you sick?” The mere idea of Olivia suffering through something alone made him want to scream.

“Not sick, but it’s sort of like that. Remember when Levi was at the farm and I was hurting?”

“Yeah.” That was a moment in time he’d rather not relive. Being helpless was the worst, and knowing he couldn’t help her then was like having his hands tied behind his back.

“I have endometriosis. It’s a condition some women have that can be painful. The gist of it is that sometimes endometrial tissue grows in places it shouldn’t.”

That didn’t make a lot of sense, but he’d be doing his own research as soon as this conversation was over. “Is there a cure? Will it get worse? Will it go away?”

“Well, there’s not a clear-cut answer. There isn’t a pill that can cure it. It does get worse over time. It could go away, but it would take surgical intervention.”

A wave of cold washed over his skin. Surgery could be minor or major. Associating Olivia with that unknown danger turned his stomach. With or without surgery, she’d been living with this pain for a while, and she’d hidden it well.

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