Page 56 of Caught in the Middle

“I’d have to agree,” Cam said about her strength. “She’s a force of nature in the best way possible and I feel luckier than you could begin to imagine to be here with her.” Henry gave him a look that he couldn’t quite read, but the man gave a quick, sharp nod.

“As you should,” he said. “She’s something special. They all are. And though I was hesitant about it at first, I can see that Asher wasn’t a good fit for Emma. Sure, they’d made things work for a long time and were comfortable. And I do like him, don’t get me wrong there, I respect the man and am glad to know Lauren is happy. However, that doesn’t change the fact that his nature, although he meant good, was suffocating and overbearing to Emma, if it didn’t downright rub her wrong sometimes.” Henry let out a chuckle, giving Cam the impression that some memories were coming to mind.

“But that same nature speaks to a part of Lauren and compliments her nicely,” he said then shook his head, turning back to the water with a far-off gaze, as though he was deep in thought. “Sometimes it’s hard being a dad,” he admitted. “You don’t always get it right and you have to pick and choose when to offer your insight. I held my tongue when Emma was with Asher because I never saw it going anywhere.” He looked at Cam again, his eyes squinting at the edges of his sunglasses as if he was choosing his next words carefully.

Cam stayed quiet and let the man continue.

“You on the other hand,” Henry trailed off and Cam held his breath. “I like you for her, not that it’s my decision. You light her up in ways I’ve not seen her shine since she first walked in our front door, dealing with more than any kid her age should have had to shoulder.” He shook his head, not noticing the deep sigh of relief leaving Cam’s body.

“She’s happy and herself around you and I’m glad to see it,” he said matter of factly. “It’s not easy. Hell, it’s never easy worrying constantly about all three of them, but I’ll do it ‘til the day I take my last breath and then probably keep on doing it when I’m long gone.” Henry took a drink of his beer.

Cam smiled and did the same, battling a war raging inside him at the relief of having this man’s approval while kicking himself for being part of a lie that put Henry at ease thinking Emma was happy. Cam hoped he was making Emma happy, even if it was just by supporting her, though it was clear listening to Henry that she never needed to bring a pretend boyfriend on this trip. These people cared about her more than anything. Hell, he already cared about her just as much.

“Now just don’t go screwing it up,” Henry said to him.

Cam clenched his teeth, trying to silence the guilt and shame forming a pit in his stomach. “I can promise you that’s the last thing I ever want to do.” Then more to himself than Henry, he said, “There’s no one else I’d rather be with.”

Chapter 21

Emma flipped through the minimal channels on the hotel’s television before giving up and pulling out her phone to check it, though she knew there wouldn’t be anything new on it since she’d already gone through every app installed not even five minutes ago.

She let out a sigh at how pathetic she felt. She’d had an amazing time with the girls earlier. The horses were so gentle and beautiful and riding them along the shore made her feel like she was in a movie. However, she couldn’t stop her thoughts from drifting back to that kissable smile and those tempting blue eyes. More than once Lulu or Lauren had to repeat what they’d said because she’d been lost in her thoughts.

Unfortunately, that meant they knew exactly what–or who–preoccupied that daydreaming mind of hers. She did her best to sidestep the subject, especially because it only ate at her further to lie and mislead someone while another knowingly listened to her do it. It made her feel ick.

After they’d rode, she decided to forgo their invitation to dinner and ordered room service instead, which she ate in the comfort of her sweatpants and a hoodie with the air conditioner cranked. She thought eating alone would let her relax a bit, but all she wound up with instead was a feeling of loneliness.

When was the last time she’d felt lonely, Emma wondered. For someone who didn’t have the most desired upbringing, she couldn’t remember ever being plagued with that feeling. Sure, she didn’t have a lot of people in her life, but the ones she did, those whom she let in enough to know her, they’d never made her feel alone in this world. It was the letting people in, she acknowledged, that had always been her struggle. It probably had something to do with fearing their pity or judgment deep down, but that wasn’t something Emma felt like unpacking right now.

In her current state of mind, she was beginning to grow concerned that the only logical reason she could think of for feeling this sudden sense of loneliness was because her hotel room lacked that certain air of balanced male ego and genuine kindness that was the dynamic mixture of Cam. And she didn’t like that being the logical thought.

How did this man who was a stranger not that long ago now have a strong foothold in her life? Enough so that she was scrolling through endless photos and posts of crap she didn’t care about because she was tired of looking at the clock and guessing how much longer until he was back.

Emma finally gave up her endless scrolling and went to the search bar to look at one profile in particular. If she couldn’t see him in person, at least she could continue her previous deep dives of his life online. She knew that social media was nothing short of a highlighted version of someone’s life, but now that she knew Cam–wow, did she actually feel like she knew him? Yeah, she decided, she kind of did. And now she could read more into those smiles that showed across the screen.

Like a bunny down the hole, Emma found herself slowly jumping from one profile to the next, some private and others public, as she clicked on other people tagged in his posts. It felt a little stalkerish, she wouldn’t lie to herself, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t enjoying herself.

It seemed like his friends were as close as her, Lulu, and Lauren. For whatever reason, that made her happy for him.

It wasn’t until she stumbled across a picture of him and a beautiful woman at what appeared to be a cabin that she felt her stomach drop. Was it because of that gorgeous smile he wore with his arm around her shoulder? Or was it because she was drop-dead gorgeous and looked comfortable enough standing close to him that Emma found an old friend–or more like an enemy–returning whom she tried not crossing paths with?

Jealousy was not an emotion she cared for. She might not have grown up lonely, but she did grow up envious. Thankfully, with a lot of self-work and guidance from the therapy she’d gone to as an adult, Emma didn’t feel in a constant state of envy anymore. She felt thankful for what she had and focused on gratitude for the good parts of her life and how it all played out. Of course, it used to be easy and still could be at times, to get in a mindset of wishing she had what felt like everyone else did. Back then, it was a mom and dad who loved their children, today it could easily be whatever society preached was a normal life for someone her age; a stable job, marriage, group of friends, routines, and traditions, you name it.

However, she’d learned to grow aware of those thoughts and not feed into them. No one created a happy life by choosing to live miserably, or at least that’s what she always told herself.

So no, she didn’t like the pang of jealousy creeping in at the edges, especially whenever she had no right to feel that way. She and Cam weren’t anything. Yet, she didn’t want him to have anything with this woman either. Not in the past. Not in the present. Not ever. However, that line of thought wasn’t going to serve her.

Besides, she already knew he was a single man with no one waiting on him back home. He told her as much and she trusted him.

So what to do with this unwanted green tinting her vision?

She ended up not having to worry about it because at that moment she heard the door’s lock click and it swung open. She popped up from where she’d been lounging and went to where she could see the entryway. Cam walked into the room like the sun rose into the sky. He was radiating good vibes.

“I take it he didn’t try to send you to the bottom of the ocean then?” Emma asked humorously.

Cam grinned and boy did it melt her insides and erase that previous thought of loneliness. Great, she thought. She wouldn’t become one of those codependent people in a relationship. Not that this was a real relationship.

“If it wasn’t for all the ones he reeled in there at the end, he just might’ve considered it.”

---