Page 55 of My Fake Fiancé

Juliana

Seeing Kurt in front of me, asking to talk, is shocking. I hadn’t expected to see him so soon. I look over at Tatyana and see her quickly getting up.

“I’ll just get out of your way. I should probably go into the office today. I’ll just go get lunch with Mike before.” She grabs her bag and pauses at the door, she looks at both of us and then at me again. She pats my arm, giving me a look to ask, are you going to be okay? I nod my head and she smiles. “Okay, I’ll see y’all around.” She gives a quick wave and then heads out the door, leaving us alone.

I stand there awkwardly, not really knowing what to do. “Well, are you going to let me in?” He asks, teasing me a bit.

“Oh, yeah, sorry.” I step back and let him into the apartment then I shut the door behind him. I follow him over to the couch and he sits down on one end, leaving enough room for me but I sit down in the single chair, further away from him. “So, you wanted to talk?” I push, not knowing what else to say.

I did not want to bring up what I saw happen last night and I couldn’t figure out why he was here. Maybe he had gotten his fix so he was ready to spend more time with the virgin. I curse the words at myself and wrap my arms around my chest. I had thought that I was doing enough to keep him interested. I was doing everything I was comfortable with and I thought that we were both enjoying ourselves, but maybe it wasn’t enough.

He sits forward on the couch, his hands folded, resting between his knees. “Yes,” he says but then he just stares at the ground, not saying anything else. I wait patiently, not wanting to be the first to speak. He bounces his knees and I clear my throat. “Sorry,” he says and stops bouncing then shifts in his seat. “You shouldn’t have walked away.” He starts.

“Okay, I didn’t actually walk away. You left. I was in your apartment for hours, you knew where I was, you could have come back.” I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself down and let him speak.

The images of Ashley on top of him keep flashing in my head. I close my eyes and rub my hands on my thighs. I gesture for him to continue talking.

“You’re right,” he says and I look up at him. He looks like he really means it like he just realized that what I said is true. “I shouldn’t have started this conversation by saying that because I know it was more than that. I should have stayed or at least come back.” I nod, agreeing with him. “We could have talked it out.” He offers. “I’m sorry. I just freaked out. Everything was built up inside me, all of the guilt and stress, and then I saw that dress and I just couldn’t deal with it anymore.”

“I’m sorry,” I tell him because I am. I understand this whole situation has been so complicated and I feel even guiltier dragging him and his family into this. “Look, Callum hasn’t bothered me, since that run-in at the dress shop. So, I think you were right, we can stop this. This can be the end. We don’t have to pretend anymore.”

“I am so sorry that I said that, Juliana. I said some things that I didn’t mean. I wasn’t pretending. I mean at first I was, but then it became real and I wasn’t pretending. Were you?” His words hurt me and I want to tell him I wasn’t pretending either, that I had fallen for him but I can’t. Not after what I saw last night.

“I was. I was pretending,” I say without looking at him because if I look at him, I won’t be able to do this to him. It might be a lie but it’s what he needs to hear. I can’t let him throw away his life because of me. “I might have overindulged and I apologize. Callum didn’t treat me well and I guess I was just enjoying how well you treated me and how you made me feel.” It isn’t a complete lie, but the truth is so much more than that. I stare at the door and hear him shift in his seat, he clears his throat.

“Okay, then I should go.” I can hear the hurt in his voice but he isn’t fighting for me or us so I just nod, still unable to look at him. It’s better if he thinks I was pretending, then he can go back to Ashley, and forget about me. I stand up and he follows suit. “Well, I’m glad this worked out for you. And I am glad that I was able to show you what a good relationship should look like. You deserve one, you deserve everything and I hope you get that.”

He looks at me and I still can’t look at him. He finally gives up and walks to the door. I follow him and open it for him. He looks at me one last time and I allow myself to look up at him. He looks sad and dejected. I quickly look away. “Well, goodbye. I’ll see you around I guess.” I nod and he starts to leave the apartment.

Before he can leave, I remember something, “Wait, Kurt…” He turns around, hope written on his face and I feel like I am about to vomit. It makes me sick to think of hurting him this much. I quickly slip the ring off my finger and hold it out to him. “Don’t forget this…” He looks down at my hand and his face quickly falls again. He reaches for it and our fingers brush for a few seconds before I pull away, uncomfortable with the spark I get from his touch. “I’m sorry…” I say quietly, looking down at the ground.

He doesn’t say anything but eventually, I see his feet turn and walk away. I close the door to the apartment and go back to the couch. I text Tatyana letting her know that he left and that he probably wouldn’t be back any time soon. She texts me back saying that we are going to go out tonight, no more staying in. I agree, then put my phone aside. I go into the bathroom and take a long, hot shower.

I immediately regret my decision to shower because I spend too much time thinking about Kurt. I get out of the shower and realize I still have a few hours before any place fun opens for the night so, I decide to go for a walk. I put on leggings, a sports bra, and a T-shirt, and then I grab my headphones and head out the door.

Once outside the building, I decide to start jogging. I hate running, I really do but it hurts my body and I need a distraction from the pain inside my heart so I pick up my pace. I run around the corner and slam into a firm body, knocking me to the floor and the other person stumbling a bit.

“Shit, I am so sorry. Are you okay?” I hop up and immediately apologize to the person I ran into. I hear a chuckle.

“You’re so small, love. You could never hurt me.” I roll my eyes at the nickname I am no longer fond of.

Chapter 50

Juliana

“Hi, Callum. Sorry, I ran into you.” I turn to start my run again even though I am quickly losing the desire to run but he steps in front of me.

“Wait.” He doesn’t touch me but I automatically move back, away from him. “I won’t touch you, don’t worry. So, how have you been, Juli?” He asks, tucking his hands in his pockets, looking genuinely interested in the answer. I eye him up and down.

“I’m alright,” I say but don’t elaborate, confused as to why he is being so civil when only a week ago he was harassing me.

“Cool. Cool. So, I was wondering. Would you want to grab a cup of coffee? Talk about some things? It doesn’t have to be coffee. I know you’re not a huge coffee drinker, but I just thought it would be good to sit down and talk.” He finishes and waits for my response.

My jaw hangs open slightly, this is the politest I have ever seen him and I have never heard him ramble before. It catches me off guard and I nod my head automatically before I can fully process what he said. A smile grows on his face and he looks excited by my response.

“Sure,” I say when my voice finally comes back to me.

“I’m free right now if you’ve got some time.” I nod again, even though I probably look wrecked from trying to exercise.

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