Page 34 of Fatal Vengeance

Later, though, we're talking. In private, where he can have a full break down and tell me about his parents. It's something we haven't actually spoken about yet, but not because I don't want to know. I just figured with my rocky parental history, and learning Asher and Griffin's parents suck fucking ass, that it was better not to ask Creed about his. I knew they had passed, but I didn't really know how he felt about that. Now, seeing the way he reacted to Asher's words earlier, I know he loved them and maybe talking about them with me will be healing in some way.

We keep walking, just stupid circles around the property because Asher's worries have sunk into my bones and I will not be treading into the thick forest and offering myself up as Celestial bait. Even thinking that has my skin breaking out in goosebumps, so I shove any and all thoughts of that fucking cult far from my mind. We're safe outside. Asher had the best security put into place.

Genevieve must sense where my thoughts are taking me because she frowns at me and then blurts out, "So should I revisit the idea of taking my bat to Asher? How upset are you that he kept those secrets for weeks? Because I can definitely teach him a lesson in honesty if you want me to." She says it so casually, with a totally neutral face, that I have to do a double take. She's joking, isn't she?

Christ, Asher better watch himself around my sister.

My lips curl up into a grin, and hers follow. With a shake of my head, I mutter, "No, keep your bat locked away. I'm… processing. It's a lot to work through, but being out here in the fresh air is helping me not feel so suffocated." I pause to take a deep breath, watching a flock of blackbirds race across the sky. "What he told me about— Well, I understand why he sat on that information for so long. Was it shitty of him? Definitely. But I'm not mad at him. I just wish… I wish none of it had happened, and then there wouldn't have been such terrible truths to uncover in the first place."

Genevieve blinks at me, reminding me a bit of an owl. "So you forgive him? Just like that?"

"There's nothing to forgive," I admit softly. Creed releases my hand and wraps his arm around my shoulders while I add, "Griffin reminded me that all this pain, this constant battle we're in, and all the horrors of my mom's past, it's all The Celestials' doing. If I'm going to be pissed at anyone, it's them, not Asher. Besides, I'm sure he agonized enough by holding all of that information in and trying to figure out how to tell us. That wouldn't have been easy, and I don't pity him. The fact that he came clean is enough for me. The Asher I met months ago, the resident asshole at Blackwood, he wouldn't have told me. That guy would have kept that information to himself just because he knew I wanted it… That I needed to know what happened to my mom." My lips tug down in a severe frown as I think about my poor mom. So tortured, so twisted up for all those years. I only wish she was still around to watch me take The Celestials down.

Creed kisses my head and whispers, "Asher lied earlier. He said I was the strongest person he knew, but that's not true. That's you, Prudence. And your mom would be so fucking proud of you."

Tears sting in my eyes all over again, my throat tight with emotion. I came outside to clear my head and separate myself from the weight of my mom's loss and all she suffered through for a while, but with Creed's soft words, I'm slipping right back into that endless sadness.

I'd like to think my mom is proud of me, watching over me still, and hopefully giving the stars a big middle finger every night. The thought makes me breathe out a sad laugh, but Genevieve and Creed don't comment on it, they just stand on either side of me and offer silent support while we walk and I try not to dissolve into a sobbing mess.

I'm just so tired of crying.

After another ten minutes or so, all of us just enjoying the peace of nature, I mumble, "I'd like my mom's ashes spread near water. The ocean or a nice lake. Or maybe even a peaceful creek that doesn't get too many visitors. Actually, yeah… I think she'd like that. Some peace and privacy as her final resting place." I pause to swallow through the knot in my throat, peering up at Creed, who looks down at me the moment my gaze is on him. "Will you make sure she gets that?" I whisper in a moment of utter weakness, choked up and struggling to get the words out. I hadn't thought about spreading my mom's ashes when I made my plans of sneaking away to The Celestials, and now it's hitting me that I won't get the chance. But my guys will do it for me. I know they will.

Creed's brows furrow, his eyes flicking across my face. His jaw ticks with frustration, as if he's piecing a puzzle together and not liking the image it's making. He stops walking, drawing me and Genevieve to an abrupt stop. "You'll do it, Prudence. You'll spread her ashes and say a proper goodbye."

I nod numbly. "I'll try." My words are nothing but a breeze on the wind, so small that I don't think Creed hears me at first, but then he's shaking his head and cupping my face in his hands, staring down at me like he can see straight through into my very soul.

"Prudence," he rumbles dangerously, stepping into me so there's no space between us. His chest is heaving, his eyes a storm of so many emotions that I can't keep track of them. I'm vaguely aware of Genevieve stepping up to my side, probably ready to fight Creed off of me if I asked her to.

Such a fierce big sister she's turning out to be. She doesn't say anything, though, trusting me to handle this situation for now.

"Creed," I murmur back to him, my voice cracking as I grab his wrists and lean into his touch. He drops his forehead to mine, our noses almost touching. His hands tremble against my face, something I've been noticing more the past few days. I hadn't been too concerned, but now it almost seems like something totally out of his control. Add to it his words from earlier, how he said he wasn't okay, that he's been slipping away… The realization slams into me in a sudden horrifying moment. I lean back a few inches so I can look into his eyes properly.

I don't say a single thing, but I can see it in his eyes, the second he knows I'm putting it all together. With a sad smile, he strokes his thumbs across my cheeks and rasps, "I'm not okay, baby. I haven't been for days, and hearing about my parents' deaths, the fire that wasn't actually an accident… That was the moment my mind fractured. Losing them, smelling their burnt skin lingering in the air days later when a social worker walked me through the home to see if anything could be salvaged. But nothing could… Not my things and not my head. Their deaths triggered so many horrible fucking things — my stay in that asylum, the drugs, the comatose state they forced me in — and Asher bringing it up again? It's tipping me right over. I'm losing myself. So I need you to tell me you're not going anywhere and I need you to mean it. For me." His eyes are brimming with tears once more while he bites his bottom lip and takes a lock of my red hair, gently weaving it through his fingers. "I can't lose your colors. I can't lose you, Prudence. Not ever, but especially not now. Please."

Ah, fuck.

It's the broken, terrified please that cracks my chest wide open and lets it all out. All my fears, my anger, and my damn plans. My breath hitches as I stumble back a step, losing that physical connection to him. Genevieve comes into view, standing beside me with wide eyes, and my words just vomit out of me.

Shaking my head, I stammer out, "What if it's the only way? You'd be okay, Creed. You all would, you'd move on. I just have to make sure you live long enough to do it. This has to end with me. I'm the reason there's been so much bloodshed, and if I can stop that, I have to try."

Creed's face transforms into something possessively angry, and I have the feeling he'd fight me right now if it meant he'd get to keep me. The only thing that's stopping him from lashing out is his devotion to me, his constant care. He'd never hurt me, even if he's thinking about it after my admission.

Well… Shit, he might chain me to the bed and spank me, actually. The flare of mine screaming in his eyes tells me that's a very real possibility now.

Thankfully, before Creed can make good on the threat in his eyes, my sister has caught up to what's been said. She shoots me an almost betrayed expression, crossing her arms over her chest like she's guarding herself. "You were planning on, what? Running off and making yourself a damn martyr?"

I sniffle, shrugging because I'm out of words. I won't lie. I was going to do just that. The least I can do now is not pretend otherwise.

Suddenly, Genevieve is right up in my face, clutching my wrist to make sure I don't scramble away like a scared animal or something. "I'm sorry, Prudence, but no," she grits out, Creed scowling and nodding his agreement from just behind her. "You don't get to barge into my life, give me hope that you and I could be close one day, and then decide to go out on a suicide mission. You do not get to take yourself away from me, and I have a feeling that Asher and Griffin would say the same thing. In fact, why don't I go fetch them? I think Asher's broody and dark nature would get through to you quite nicely."

"I'll do it," Creed drawls, walking backward a few steps, holding my gaze while he rubs his jaw like he's thinking of ways to punish me.

"Creed, don't," I warn desperately. "Please. Don't worry them. I just… You have to know this is the only way to—"

"No!" he shouts, startling me and Genevieve, who jumps a little and blinks at him in surprise. Creed shoves a hand through his hair, tugging on the raven locks. He stalks forward and my sister, the traitor, releases me and steps aside just as Creed closes in, lifting me before I can stop it and tossing me over his shoulder. I squeal and smack his back with my hands, not trying to hurt him, but trying to get free. Creed snarls, slapping his palm down on my ass. "Do not test me right now, Prudence Cate. My monsters are far too close to the surface to be fucked with."

Oh hell, he middle-named me.

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