Page 31 of Cage Me

My wolf is quiet but present, and I lean into her strength that has become my own in the years since I was old enough to understand that I would never be alone, not truly.

Am I really going to be someone’s mate? Allow the need to protect him to come before everything else?

Instead of a direct answer, I hear Lia’s words repeat inside my head.

Once you quit running, you just might find that you’ve attracted all the right people into your life.

There have been brief moments over the last couple of months being in Crossroads that I’ve considered staying right here, bringing my mother and brother here and building a home within this town instead of hiding away from the world.

Have I already stopped running and didn’t realize it? And if I have, are those who I’ve disregarded as annoying or as having ulterior motives the ones I should have been trusting all along?

I’ve always had one foot out the door even when I’ve been stationary, but after today, I’m over it. There’s a possibility in the morning that I’ll go back to being the distrusting shifter I’ve been for years, but as the essence of Drake beats inside my cold heart, warming it from the inside out, I don’t want to go back to that dark and lonely place I’ve been hiding in.

Today, my world was turned upside down. I can keep fighting against literally everyone in my life, or for the first time ever, I can put trust in someone other than myself and start really fighting for the people I care about most.

I realize now that I’ve been telling myself that I’ve been doing everything I can to save my family, but really, I couldn’t stand the thought of living alone for the rest of my life.

I needed them more than they ever needed me.

Minutes pass, and I stay right where I am on the couch, unmoving with my eyes still closed. The sounds of Peter’s laughter begin to fade, as do the voices of the other adults in the house until there is only silence.

I begin to think that I’m on the verge of falling asleep right where I sit, but as time continues to tick by, I find myself in a state of suspended being that I’ve never experienced before.

I’m free of all my worries. There’s nothing I need to fix or acquire. There’s nobody waiting on me. There’s just me and my peace.

Yet, I’m not alone.

It takes more concentration to sort out who’s with me, but the more I search for the presence of others waiting for me just beyond the wall of my own mind, the brighter their lights become.

Mom and Peter appear to me first, likely because they’re most familiar to me, but Drake is an immediate third. The second his essence is recognized, his glow intensifies in my mind even more than my own family. I want to reject that notion, but I stop myself. The more I just let things be instead of trying to control them, the calmer my heart is.

Next—and this surprises me—is Kasha. Her light is dim, but she’s there, waiting. She’s followed by Natalia and even Corvin, the alpha whose pack I’ve rejected more times than he deserves. His kindness is something I’ve shunned like a disease, but I’m starting to see that I’ve been wrong.

I don’t know what any of this means or how I even got to this state of being, but now that I’m here, I don’t ever want to leave. This is the happiness I’ve been fighting for, and if I open my eyes, I’m afraid it will all slip away.

The shape of a wolf appears next, her light as white as my own wolf’s natural fur. It isn’t until she’s closer and I can see her eyes through the brightness that I realize it is my wolf.

What are you doing here? I ask, the calmness in my voice not sounding at all like the woman I’ve been for too long now.

Our fight is far from over, but this peace you feel? We can have that and so much more, she replies with reverence, though her mouth never moves. Hearing her voice, a softer version of my own, makes my heart race. She’s never spoken to me with words, only growls and through my own intuition, which I very well could have been getting wrong for some time now.

She continues, not acknowledging my shock. Just because you’ve resisted doesn’t mean you’ve lost. Keep your heart open, Spencer. Listen to those around you and we’ll be home before you even realize it.

I try to ask her how this is possible, but as I think the words, no sounds reiterate them and the space I’ve only just found begins to fade away.

The harder I try to grasp it, the quicker the light dims until it’s gone completely and I’m back on the couch, alone in the living room of a hybrid I don’t really know. Though, my interest in changing that has increased tenfold.

Voices from the kitchen filter back into my thoughts, and I catch Drake say “Kel.” That’s all it takes to have me standing up, but I move too fast and the room spins.

I reach out for the couch to steady me, and my stomach churns, forcing me to close my eyes. The action immediately calms me, and I hear the faint echo of my wolf’s rumblings.

Think before I act.

That’s not anything she’s just said, but it’s also not something I often do. I’m always triggered to deflect and run, right into or away from things. Maybe it’s time I pause first.

With that notion at the forefront of my mind, I walk calmly into the kitchen, no longer feeling weak. In fact, I’m the complete opposite. My heart beats with a renewed purpose, my breathing is deeper, and my eyes are seeing things in a whole new way.

Hell, even my skin seems brighter than ever before, just like the glow I was seeing of those I’ve been trying to push away.

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