Page 18 of Shattered Mates

I’ve taken his strength for granted lately, but tomorrow will be a new day. Tomorrow, everything will be better. Showing my mate how much he means to me and always will is at the top of my to-do list.

Right after a few hours of sleep.

We wake to two teenagers screaming at each other and all we can do is shake our heads. We might be supernatural, but things like a big brother using all of his sister’s fancy conditioner don’t go unnoticed by anyone in the pack house.

I’m up first, but Cillian grabs my wrist. “I have this. Why don’t you go shower and I’ll meet you there?”

“Hmm, that sounds like heaven.” I push up onto my toes, give him a kiss, then smack his ass. “Put our pups in their place and hurry back to me.”

“Yes, Alpha.” He winks on his way out the door, and I’m practically skipping to our bathroom. Yes, this is going to be a better day than we’ve had in a long time. Nothing—not even shouting children—will ruin my reunion with my best friend and the start of being me again, not a stressed-out alpha.

I’m undressed and in the shower just as soon as the water is steaming. As I stand under the spray, I close my eyes and let the scalding water take away any lingering tension.

My pack is safe, my best friend is here, my family is happy and healthy. There’s not much more I could wish for.

Well, maybe a month’s vacation, but that’s not in the cards for an alpha. Some days I resent that, but most days, I love what I do. Being in East Texas, taking care of our people and protecting those who need it, there’s a sense of pride that nothing could ever replace.

Cillian finally joins me, stepping through the glass door of our shower, but before it’s even closed, I leap for him. My legs wrap around his waist, and I hold his face. “Love me.”

“Now and forever,” he whispers as he captures my mouth and presses my back against the tile wall.

Gods, I don’t think I could get any luckier than I feel right now.

Chapter Nine

Andie

After bringing River and Jules back to the pack, I leave as quickly as I can. I need Foster. I need space. I need…nothing, because I don’t deserve any sort of relief.

For the last five years, I’ve known the potion I gave River didn’t work as planned. I tried everything I could to fix the mess I created, but it was already too late.

I have no clue how Jules broke through to him—I can only guess I have the Moon Goddess to thank for that—but I was convinced that I’d ended his life.

The guilt has been choking me for so long that I can’t remember the last time I took a full breath or have been able to relax. Even on the days I’ve spent focused on the community’s needs, River has never been far from my mind.

Now, having seen the torture in his eyes personally, I don’t know how I’ll ever move past this.

I teleported back to LA, my intent originally to go find Foster, but when I arrive at the pack house and everything is dark, I decide otherwise.

The need to expel my frustrations, to unleash the pent-up magic within, is too strong to ignore. Lying in bed with my mate might make my heart feel better, but this tornado of chaos within is so much bigger than my heart.

Hurting River, even if unintentionally, had a ripple effect. I had to watch so many people worry over him that I’ve lost faith in myself. Not only that, but trust in my ability to help my mate lead his pack.

I’ve spent months slowly pulling away from everything that I might be able to destroy. I hoped that getting River back might alleviate my fears, but it seems seeing him has only amplified my remorse.

Soon, I find myself at the community that used to be my coven. Beatrix turned our home into a safe haven for all supernaturals. Though, it still leans heavily on the witch side, which is why I’m here.

The training center they have is the only place that I can fully release my powers without worrying about hurting anyone else. I need that right now.

Except as soon as the building comes into view, I sense a familiar presence behind me. My shoulders droop. I love this woman, but I’m not in the mood for her. I keep walking, hoping she’ll leave me be, but instead, she reappears in front of me.

“What are you doing here in the middle of the night?” Beatrix asks with a raised brow.

The woman might be leaning toward ancient in terms of age, but she is still a force to be reckoned with.

Her silver hair is braided over her shoulder, and she wears an all-black cotton outfit, the pants billowy on her smaller frame. When I don’t answer her right away, her green eyes darken. “Andie.”

“River is back in East Texas,” I tell her, hoping that will be enough. She knows how I’ve suffered, has even tried to help me through a lot of my worst days, but my magic, my mess.

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