Page 35 of Impossible Thrills

“Your daughter …”

“Avalyn,” she supplied, even as she knew that wasn’t what he was asking. “She was stillborn. I was only two days from my due date. It was late at night, and I realized she hadn’t moved for a while. I knew something was wrong. I …” She was talking too fast now and not looking at him, her breath coming out in fast pants. She cleared her throat, hoping she could get the story out without sobbing.

“Darcy.” Nick gently guided her into the room and then shut the door behind him.

She stared up at him. What was he doing?

“Cameras,” he supplied. “They’re all over the ship, but not in the bedrooms. I wouldn’t want something personal to be recorded.”

“Oh. Thank you.”

He wrapped his arm around her and walked her over to the love seat. Sitting side by side, he turned to her. “You knew something was wrong?”

Leaning against the edge of the couch, she tucked her feet under her, spread the dress over her legs, set the towel on the floor, and turned to him. The locket was still in her hand. She set it on the side table. Was she going to share her pain with a man she didn’t know if she could trust?

She looked into his deep-brown eyes. How could she not trust him? Every part of him seemed sincere and invested in her. Johnny had originally given her the same impression. Was she setting herself up for a huge crash again?

“I called my husband; he was at a work party.” Now she knew he’d probably been with his current mistress, but she wasn’t sure how much dirty laundry she wanted to air.

Nick’s features tightened.

“I told him I had to go to the hospital and I couldn’t wait. He told me to wait; he didn’t want me driving in my condition. He promised he was on his way and he’d take me. I didn’t want to go alone, but after waiting almost an hour, calling every ten minutes and him promising he was coming, I gave up on him. I climbed in my car and drove myself to the hospital. Avalyn was already gone when I got there.”

No heartbeat. No hope.

Tears ran down her face at the memory. She’d been terrified and so alone. Then the long induced labor. Still mostly alone as for thirty-six hours she went through labor and Johnny was out in the hall on phone calls or sleeping in the chair. At least he hadn’t left her. He also had never apologized for taking so long that fateful night. The thought she always had to bury was if Avalyn might’ve survived if she hadn’t waited for him. She couldn’t let herself be consumed with anger or what-ifs.

Nick’s arms came around her and he cradled her against his chest. “I am so sorry, Darcy.”

She couldn’t even thank him. At his tender touch and words, the tears came more fiercely. A sob rose and then ripped from her throat. Nick held her and let her cry.

She had cried deeply and often in her house by herself after she lost Avalyn, but never while Johnny held her. He’d had a nice graveside service set up for Avalyn and he’d engraved the locket with a photo he must’ve taken in the hospital after Ava was born, when they let Darcy hold her and say her goodbyes. But he’d never held Darcy while she cried.

She didn’t know how much time passed as she cried and cried, cuddled against Nick’s warm flesh, never wanting to leave this spot. When her tears finally dried, Nick gently released her. She didn’t want to let him go, but she was grateful for the time she’d spent in his arms.

“Thank you,” she managed. “That was very healing.”

Nick studied her. “You are brave and very strong. To think you suffered a devastating loss and then you chose to help and love other children. Unreal.”

She felt unreal as he looked at her. She didn’t know how to respond. She could hardly admit she’d spent a month wallowing and then been stunned by the irrefutable proof of her husband cheating and gotten a quick divorce. Then she had spent another month aimlessly searching before she sold everything and packed her car and bravely or stupidly crossed the border.

He didn’t seem to expect her to answer, but graciously started asking her more questions about her baby and then that morphed into how she’d lost her mom and grandpa and her dad had deserted her. She told him about her lack of family, and her step-grandmother being so cold. In some ways he could relate, not having blood relations, but he’d had loads of love. Papa Pete and Mama Marie and all his siblings, in-laws, and nieces and nephews fascinated her. She was grateful he’d had a wonderful adoptive family. Her grandpa, her mom’s dad, had been the best, but his wife, Mrs. Peterson, had been stiff and cold. When Grandpa died, Darcy hadn’t received any love or hugs or kind words. She’d had a house and food and lots of freedom, but she’d craved love and a family and someone who cared if she stayed out too late.

They talked for a long time. He told her more about his family. They’d always treated him like he was theirs, and she loved them for that. The conversation morphed into her homes and her little ones and the hopes and dreams for each of them to find great adoptive families. Some had, but not enough. She told him story after story about impetuous and adorable Samuel, the sweetheart Izzy, and giggly Missy.

“I’d better go and let you get some rest,” Nick finally said, standing.

She stood as well. “How long do you think Jagger and Hays waited for us at the hot tub?”

Nick chuckled. “They didn’t. They had a plan to not show up and let us be alone.”

“My new brothers have turned into a pair of matchmakers, eh?”

He chuckled, but then he sobered and cupped her jawline with his palm. “Darcy … you’ve lumped me in with them as a brother.”

Her eyes widened.

“Do you think of me as a brother like Jagger and Hays?”