Page 92 of Meet Me in Berlin

‘Today. I was going to meet you at Heathrow, bring you here and tell you the truth.’

‘Here? So you were going to fuck me first and then tell me?’

Shock flashes in her eyes. ‘God, Holly, no. Of course not. I didn’t want to tell you over the phone with you in Berlin and me here.’

‘Anyway, none of this matters because I’m going home tomorrow.’

Casey’s eyes widen. ‘To Melbourne?’

I nod.

Her swallow is audible. ‘Please don’t.’

‘I have to.’ My voice cracks, and I take a deep breath to get through the next sentence. ‘Mum had a stroke and she’s in hospital.’

Casey slumps back in the chair, defeated.

My heart aches for us, for what we could’ve been. I want to pull her close. To kiss her lovely mouth. To wrap my arms and legs around her and stay like that until the morning. But that would be too painful because once I’m home, I don’t know that I’ll ever come back.

She wipes a tear from her cheek. ‘I guess it’s too soon to ask if there’s any chance of you coming back?’

‘I don’t know. I need to be there for Mum.’

Casey nods, a deep sadness etched on her face.

I stand, needing her to leave before I relent. ‘I have to be up early, so you should go.’

She stands too and fixes me with an intense stare, like she senses my urge to hold her one last time. ‘Let me stay. I’ll go with you to Heathrow in the morning.’

I hesitate, desperate for that, but no, we were never meant to be. I can’t trust her, this stranger I thought I could love, this fantasy I’d created and built in my head. ‘No, Casey. This is over.’ I force myself to walk to the door and hold it open.

She steps in front of me and cups my cheek, and I instinctively lean into her palm.

‘Please try and forgive me,’ she says. ‘I am so, so sorry I hurt you. I’ll always regret it and I’ve always loved you.’

Those words about love again. I squeeze my eyes shut as a tear escapes. When I open them, she’s still there, so close. I tilt my head forward, and then her lips are on mine, sweet and warm. I let out a sob and clutch her face as our kiss deepens.

She rests her forehead against mine and places her hand flat against my chest. ‘I know you feel the same.’

‘Goodbye, Casey,’ I choke.

But she doesn’t respond, just kisses me one last time and jogs down the stairs.

I race to the window, waiting for her to appear. She steps out onto the footpath and glances up, gives me a sad smile, and disappears around the corner. And for a second time, my heart collapses as I watch her walk away.

Chapter 32

Casey, London

Iround the corner and slump against the side of the end terrace, the deep pang of regret anchoring me to the spot. How could I fuck this up so badly? I’m desperate to roll back time and tell Holly the truth that first night. It would have been so easy. As soon as she closed the space between us, all I had to say was, ‘There’s something I need you to know.’ She would’ve stepped away, looked out over the river, asked questions, and I would’ve said, I don’t love Eva. It’s over between us. I need to call her right now to tell her, but once I’ve done that, please give me a chance because you’ve always been in my heart and now here you are.

I lean my head back against the brick and choke out a sob.

‘You all right, love?’ a man says, approaching me.

I wipe my face. ‘Yeah.’

‘You’re not hurt?’ He stops in front of me. He has kind eyes and a gentle voice like my dad.

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