Page 75 of Meet Me in Berlin

‘Casey! Dad’s in hospital! Can’t you just support me?’

An ugly twist deep in my gut forces me to sit down. ‘Fine. I’ll come home tomorrow.’

She sniffs again and there’s a murmur as she talks to her mum. ‘I need to go. The doctor is calling us.’

My throat is scratchy and dry, blocked with the words I’d rehearsed all day. ‘Let me know how he is. I’ll sort a flight in the morning.’ I drop my phone onto the table and press the heels of my hands to my forehead. ‘Fuck.’ I throw my head back. ‘Fuuuck.’ I jump up and pace the office, hoping the movement will spark a solution to my dilemma. Then I stop short; it’s clear what I need to do – return to London and tell Eva the truth.

With a sick stomach, I head back out to the gallery. Holly is still chatting with Matias, the glow of the spotlight above giving her a golden aura. I have no idea what this is between us; all I know is that I can’t lose her again. I wanted to tell her the truth tonight. I planned to have the conversation with Eva and then tell Holly everything, but I can’t tell her now and then leave in the morning. The risk of her disappearing is too great.

I make my way over and Holly’s face brightens when she sees me. ‘There you are,’ she says.

I grab her hand and take her to the side. ‘Listen. I … erm.’ I take a breath. ‘I need to go home tomorrow.’

Her face falls and she places the wine glass on the table. ‘I thought you were here for a few more days at least.’

‘So did I. Something’s come up with … with a…’ I clear my throat. ‘A friend. Their family.’

‘Oh. Jaz?’

‘No, not Jaz.’

She releases herself from my grip and steps back, confusion and hurt in her eyes. ‘Please tell me this isn’t it for us.’

I grab her hand again. ‘God, no.’ I think fast. ‘Come to London when your Airbnb is up at the end of the week, yeah? Can you do that? I mean, do you want to do that?’

She softens. ‘You want me to be with you in London?’

‘Of course. If that’s what you want?’

She rolls her eyes. ‘I think I’ve made it very clear what I want.’

Even though I said it on the fly, now the offer is out there, it makes me realise it’s exactly what I want, too. ‘Brilliant. You’ve already paid until the end of the week, right?’

‘Yep, until Saturday.’

‘Then stay and enjoy your time here and come over on the weekend. I’ll be at work all week anyway and be working late every night to catch up after being away.’

She beams. ‘Okay, Berlin this week, London next.’

I clutch her face and kiss her. ‘And we still have tonight.’

She sighs against my mouth. ‘And we still have tonight.’

‘Hey, lovers,’ Felix says, approaching us. ‘We’re going to a bar afterwards if you want to join us?’

Holly and I exchange a questioning glance and both nod.

‘Felix and I will finish up and we’ll go enjoy the rest of our night, yeah?’ I say to Holly.

She picks up her glass, her eyes dancing and her cheeks flushed. ‘We will.’

I see out artists and guests, and peer over at Holly every now and then. She’s glowing even more since I asked her to come to London, but my head has started to throb with the stress of what the coming week might bring.

Half an hour later, the four of us are in a bar, nursing drinks and chatting about how well the night went, the artists and the most popular pieces. Holly talks about the photographs, telling us about techniques the photographers used. Felix, and Matias in particular, being a hobbyist photographer, are enthralled.

When Holly disappears to the bathroom and Matias goes to the bar, Felix gives me a wry smile across the table.

‘What?’ I ask, sensing what’s coming.