Page 79 of Meet Me in Berlin

‘I’m on Instagram – with my full name, and the profile pic at the mo is a photo of the Sappho and Erinna painting.’

‘Ah, a painting.’ I shake my head. ‘Never thought to look for a painting as your profile pic.’

‘I’ll take you to the Tate next week to see it.’ She pulls open the door. ‘See you in London town,’ she says with a wink.

The door clicks shut, and an emptiness consumes me. I open Instagram and search for her. Her account is private, so I send a request and hop out of bed. By the time I make coffee and hop back in bed, my phone pings with a notification that she’s accepted. I send a message.

Miss you already x

She replies with a quick video clip. ‘Miss you more,’ she says to the camera and blows me a kiss.

Chapter 26

Casey, Berlin

Once my bag is checked, I pass through security, grab a double-strength black coffee and head for gate C7. Eva hasn’t responded to my messages asking after her dad, so I assume she’s occupied at the hospital. I take a seat by the window with a view of planes parked along the tarmac. My eyes feel dry from little sleep. After Holly drifted off, I tossed and turned, unable to ignore the tightening in my chest and the thoughts racing around my head. I hate that I’ve lied to Holly, I hate that I’ve lied to Eva, and I hate the worst part that’s still to come – breaking up with Eva while her dad is in hospital. I attempt to rehearse the speech I put together in the middle of the night, but a knot of anxiety forms in my stomach, so I call Jaz instead.

‘All right, mate,’ she says. ‘Can’t chat long, got a big meeting with a potential new account in a bit. Where are you?’

‘At Brandenburg Airport.’

‘Ah, you’re coming home.’

‘Yep. Eva finally called me back last night. I was just about to tell her when she says her dad’s in hospital, had a car accident.’

‘Shit. Is he okay?’

‘She didn’t know anything at the time, and I haven’t heard from her since. But she wanted me to come home, and well, obviously I couldn’t tell her then, could I?’

‘No. That would’ve been a bit rough.’

A sigh slips out. ‘It’s killing me doing this to Holly.’

I hear Jaz choke on a drink. ‘Whoa. You haven’t told Holly yet?’

‘No,’ I say in a small voice.

‘Fucking hell, Case. I told you not to mess this up. That meant you needed to tell Holly as soon as.’

My defences rise. ‘It was never the right time.’

‘There must have been one time. You’ve literally been stuck together since Friday night, that’s…’ She pauses and I imagine her counting the days on her fingers. ‘Five nights. There must have been a moment to slip it in. What, did you just shag the whole time and not speak?’

‘Erm … we shagged a lot, yeah.’ I huff. ‘And I’ve been working full-time since Sunday, so we haven’t had that much time together.’

She tuts. ‘You didn’t talk about your pasts at all? What you’ve both been up to for eleven years?’

‘We did, just not a lot about relationships. More family and jobs, and … us, I guess, and what was I going to say after I’d already had sex with her? “That was amazing, but I have a fiancée in London who I don’t plan on marrying because I’m going to break it off and it’s not because of you, I was actually going to break it off anyway; you just happened to turn up at the same time”?’

‘Yeah. Exactly that,’ Jaz says.

I groan. ‘It’s not that simple.’

‘Fuck, Casey. Does all anyone need to do with you is shove their pussy in your face and you’re a mess?’

‘Um…’

‘Jesus Christ. Don’t answer that.’ She sighs. ‘Look, I’m hardly one to lecture on stable relationships, but?—’

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