Page 62 of Gabriel's Salvation

“No!” Riley shouts as she pushes me away forcefully.

“You don't change do you?” she snaps angrily. “You think that after everything you can just kiss me, make me fall for you all over again, just to get what you want. Well, that's not me!” I can feel the anger and frustration radiating from her.

“Well kinda, but it's not like that. I mean yeah, I wanted to make us both feel better. But not in the way you think,” I stutter. What the fuck do I say? I can feel my anger creeping up within me. She’s acting like I was wrong to kiss her, to try to take things a step further. She was into that just as much as me!

I attempt to take a step forward, hoping she’ll let me inside since I don't really want to air my feelings to the whole street, but she pushes me back again, this time closing the door behind us both.

“Shit, are your parents home?” I say in a hushed voice.

“No, they're at a function,” she says, shaking her head. “But that's not the point, you're still not coming inside.”

“Why?” I ask, feeling confused. What is she hiding?

“Because if you come in we both know how this will end,” she says as she places her hand on her hips and gives me that sassy look of hers.

Would that be so bad? I mean, the best way to settle an argument is in the bedroom right? We do our best talking in the bedroom. She usually forgives me when we are alone in the bedroom.

I don’t fuck things up there. I know exactly what to do and say to make her smile then.

Riley’s words bring me back to the situation at hand. “What do you want from me, Gabe? Do you want to be my boyfriend? Hold hands in the park, go on fancy dates? Or do you just want to fuck?”

“Err, I don't date. Fuck maybe? No, I don't wanna just fuck, I want…”

“What? You want what, Gabe?” Riley snaps.

“I don't fucking know!” I snap back.

“Well, then there’s your fucking problem. Until you do know, you gotta leave me alone. Let me heal. Let me move on.” I see the tears making another appearance in her eyes.

“I want YOU, okay. I don't know what that means, but I want you. I can't stop thinking about you.” I shout back honestly.

“Fine, then let's go tell the world we're a couple. You call Kelly up right now and tell her you're no longer single, and you don't want to ever see her again.”

“I don't care about her. She's a whore, but…”

“But nothing! You've said everything you need to. If you're not ready to shout it to the world, then I'm not willing to be anything more. I've been the secret girlfriend and the long distance girlfriend. I'm not willing to do it again. Either you stand up and proudly tell the world we're together. Or you leave right now.”

“It's not that easy. I don't know how to do this. I've never done the whole dating thing before. It's gonna take time. My head is fifty shades of fucked up.” I again attempt to reach out and touch her, praying that our bodies can say what my words cannot, but she slaps my hand away.

“No, Gabe, this isn’t about fucking sex. I need more!” she cries.

“I don't fucking know how to have a normal relationship,” I implore but it's clearly falling on deaf ears. Why can’t this be enough for her? Why aren’t I enough for her?

“Well then I suggest you learn. I suggest you go get some fucking help to deal with whatever the fuck is broken in you and come back to me when you know how to deal with a relationship that’s not solely based on sex!” she shouts.

“Don't cry,” I beg, as I see the tears begin to run down her beautiful cheeks.

“I'm not crying! I'm just angry!” she screams back, this time so loudly it causes her voice to crack. “Just go!” she says sadly as she turns to walk back inside.

I don't want to, but I know if I don't leave now my own temper is gonna force me to say something, anything to hurt her just so she doesn't see the hurt inside me. I know that if I say or do anything else to hurt her, I'll never win her back.

“Fine!” I snap back as I turn and finally allow her to slam the door behind me.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Riley

Six Months Later