Page 48 of Gabriel's Salvation

“Don't get me wrong, Gabe can be the greatest person in the world. I've told you about the shit I went through, right?” he asks Tucker, who affirmatively nods at him. Both me and Harper give each other a ‘do you know anything’ look before we both shake our heads.

“Yeah, well, without him I wouldn't have survived.” Nate sighs and I can tell he isn't just talking hypothetically. “He saw and did a lot of bad shit, probably more than even I realize.” A visible shudder runs through Nate’s body and he has this glazed over look like he’s remembering things that weren’t pleasant to experience.

“That doesn’t...” Tucker begins but is cut off by Nate. “You don't understand,” Nate snaps as he tugs on the root of his hair. “He had it hard. Really goddamn hard. I was lucky, I got to know love and kindness with the Jacksons when I moved away. He didn't get that. He spent his time alone in the house where our father abused us. You can’t even begin to imagine how much that shit fucks you up. Hell, I don’t even know and I was there for most of it,” Nate says as his voice begins to shake.

Again, me and Harper share an ‘oh shit, I don't think we should be hearing this’ kind of look.

“He’s got a big heart, bigger than anyone I know. And he will put his life on the line to save you if he cares for you. But dude, that side is buried deep behind hundreds and hundreds of walls. He doesn't know how to love or be loved. Even with me he struggles to connect.” Nate turns his attention to me now, “I'm not saying forgive him, Riley. What he did to you, it is unforgivable. But know that I honestly don't think he meant to hurt you.”

“Can we talk about something else, I just can't do this now.” I sigh as I rub at my temple. I can't stand listening to this. I don't know what the future holds for me or Gabe but I know that I can't deal with it now. It's taking all my energy not to either sit and cry or run after him.

“Of course,” Nate replies with a sympathetic half smile.

“I got ice cream,” Izzy calls and instantly a weight seems lifted from Nate because when he hears her voice, his whole face lights up and he gets a goofy grin on his face.

“And that's why we're going to keep all this to ourselves,” I whisper.

“What? Why?” Tucker asks.

I nod my head in the direction of Izzy and Nate who are giggling just a few feet away. “Do you want to be the one who makes either of them choose between the loyalty they have for their best friends and family, and the loyalty they have towards each other?”

“Good point,” Tucker says, nodding in agreement.

“What are you guys whispering about?” Ava asks, as she wraps her hands around Tucker's waist.

“Well, it wouldn't be much of a surprise if we told you,” Harper answers without missing a beat.

“My birthday? Aww babe, you're the greatest,” she says leaping into his arms and kissing him.

“You do realize we're gonna have to help Tucker find the perfect gift now,” I laugh with Harper as Ava and Tucker begin making out.

“Who are you kidding? You know we would have had to anyway. If we left it to Tucker he'd get her a football or something,” Harper giggles in return as we walk away.

Chapter Eighteen

Gabe

Climbing on my bike, I rev the engine and take off. I don’t have a destination in mind; I just know I have to leave. I have to get out of here before I march back down that beach, beat the shit out of her new boyfriend, and throw Riley over my shoulder. The way I'm feeling right now, I'm more than happy to be arrested for kidnapping if it means I get to keep her.

The street signs whiz past me as I get faster and faster. Part of me is tempted to call Kelly and let her work out some of my tension, but since she's the cause, well maybe not the cause, but she's at least partly to blame, I decide against it. Instead, I turn off and drive out onto the open road. I continue driving until I spot a little bar in the middle of nowhere. Pulling up to it, I make my way inside.

“I'll take a beer and a whisky,” I say to the woman behind the bar.

She brings the beer and then comes over to pour my whiskey. “Leave the bottle,” I say as I reach out and pour myself a larger serving.

“But sir,” the shy blond behind the bar tries saying.

“I said, leave the fucking bottle!” I snap. She leaves the bottle and scurries away. I keep drinking and drinking and drinking until the bottle is almost gone.

“Drinking to celebrate or forget?” a woman beside me leans over and asks.

“Both. Drinking to celebrate escaping jail and to forget the things I had to do when inside,” I deadpan. I barely manage to keep a straight face when the stupid bitch almost falls off her chair in shock as she scurries to leave. I take out a wad of cash from my wallet and throw it on the counter, grabbing the rest of my bottle on my way out. As soon as the air hits me it almost knocks me off my feet. Fuck, there’s no way I can drive back in this state.

Staggering back inside I find the quiet bartender again. “Where's the nearest motel?” I slur the words at her.

“Err, turn left, head to the bottom of the road. It's about ten or so minutes walk and then you'll see a side road. It's just down there, you can't miss it.”

I throw another $20 on the bar, although I have no idea what for, and head back outside. I do the best I can to follow the instructions but I swear the roads keep moving around me. Or maybe it's the rest of the whiskey I drink as I'm walking. Finally, I find what I'm looking for. I bang on the door, expecting it to be closed, but fall straight through when I realize it's open.

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