Page 81 of Whistleblower

I nod. “Seize the moment, if you will.”

“Right. When I look back on the past few years of my life and think about what I've lost… I’d handle Empress just the same. But I wish I could turn back time and go with Dad to Italy and eat some damn gelato. I wish I would’ve read War and Peace and talked to him about why he likes that boring-ass book so much. I should’ve asked him more questions about my mom before it was too late.”

“Your mother?” Eden hasn’t mentioned her mother before. I assumed, like with my own mom, it was a less than pleasant memory.

“She died when I was little. I was barely two when they told her she had Stage IV ovarian cancer.” She shrugs quickly. “We had a little time after that…but not enough.”

“Eden, this is too fucking much.”

Her eyes widen, then freeze in alarm. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to unload on you.”

I spin in my chair and pull her between my legs. “No, sweet girl, I mean you’ve gone through far too much. How are you still standing? Why do you still smile all the time?”

She rolls her eyes. “I’m not that impressive, Linc. I cry in private. I have a timer…it’s a whole thing.” She tries to wave me off.

“Give yourself credit. I’ve seen people turn bad because of far less than what you’ve gone through.” I stare into her eyes until she looks uncomfortable but I don’t break my gaze. I have a question I desperately need answered—a truth that needs uncovering before we go any further. “What’s the secret? Why are you so good, kind, and forgiving in the midst of this fucked up world?”

“Am I?”

“Also humble,” I add. Squeezing her hip bones gently, I wait for her answer. I’m not letting go until she helps me understand the Eden Essence—the very reason I am obsessed with this unicorn of a human being.

“You want a lie?” she asks.

“Sure.”

“It’s all a cover. I’m a hardened assassin. You’ve met your match, Lincoln Abraham, and I’ve got you right where I want you.”

I blink at her ridiculous statement. Although, I do feel like I’ve finally met my match. She just happens to be my polar opposite. “Great. Now, the truth.”

“I don’t know, Linc. I am who I am…who I’ve always been,” she whispers. “If I have to choose between anger and sadness, I prefer sadness. If I have to choose between hurting and hurting someone else, the first is less burdensome to me. I’m trying to lead by example I suppose. We should go through life being mindful of each other, not by validating our pain and insecurities by criticizing and terrorizing others. We have to stop acting like starting war is easier than starting conversations. I want to live in a world where—”

She stops abruptly, her eyes landing on her toes.

“Where what?” I ask.

“Where your job isn’t necessary. Where people who don’t like guns and violence…people who don’t want to fight…don’t have to be so goddamn scared.”

Me too.

“Speaking of which,” I say, hopping up to retrieve the little box I left on the TV stand. “I forgot to give you your present last night.” I didn’t forget, I never forget. I knew this present would start a conversation, and there were more pressing matters last night to attend to.

By the time I’m back, Eden has stolen my chair. I hand her the little box.

“What’s this for?”

“Because you’re pretty, and because I’m your sugar daddy and like to buy you nice things.” Was that sarcasm? Since when am I sarcastic?

She rolls her eyes. “We’ll call it an early birthday gift then.”

“When’s your birthday?”

“The fifth. So, Thursday.”

I feel my brows furrow and she notices my face pull in concern. Setting the box aside, Eden peers at me quizzically. She must misunderstand my confused expression. “What’s the problem, Linc? Is thirty too old for you?” She shoots me a playfully daring smile that tells me she’s joking...but I should also choose my words carefully.

“I’ve never been a boyfriend before, let alone during a birthday. Should I… What should I do?”

“Oh.” She laughs and exhales in relief. “With me, it’s easy. As my boyfriend, all you need to do is leave me alone.” She scrunches her nose, trying to be adorable.