Page 61 of Darkest Sin

He keeps going until he’s fully seated inside of me, and as he finally starts to fuck me, he holds on to me as though the idea of ever letting me go is simply unheard of. It’s everything, yet excruciatingly heartbreaking at the same time.

He moves in and out, every thrust of his thick cock working me to the edge, and when he reaches down between us and gently rubs his fingers over my clit, my whole body begins to shake. I throw my head back as my chest heaves for sweet oxygen.

His other hand grips my waist, his fingers digging into me as he holds on for dear life. “Chiara,” he murmurs.

“Don’t stop,” I gasp, feeling the familiar tightening deep inside of me, building like a coil preparing to spring. “Don’t ever stop.”

He gives me everything I need, just as he always has, and as that coil gets tighter and tighter, the intensity builds. I can’t hold on to it a moment longer, and as he thrusts inside of me again, stretching me so damn wide, I explode in a dazzling mess around him.

My pussy wildly convulses, squeezing him so damn tight that he comes with me, shooting his hot load deep inside of me. His hold tightens on my waist, but he doesn’t stop moving as my high consumes me, fucking me like his one and only queen.

My chest rises and falls with rapid movement, desperately trying to catch my breath as I finally begin to come back down to earth. My world is shattered like glass as I come undone, knowing that this part of me will always belong to him.

It was barely a month spent together, but it was enough to leave a scar right in the center of my chest, and I know without a doubt that I will never be the same.

Killian’s body stills, but he leaves his cock seated deep inside of me, caging his arms around my body and rolling us until he’s sitting against the headboard with me straddled over his strong thighs.

“You must know that it was never my intention to hurt you.”

“Whether it was your intention or not, that’s exactly what you did.”

“I know, Angel. And I will live my life with the weight of your pain on my shoulders.”

I nod, more than okay for him to have to carry around the guilt for how this went down as I desperately try to hold back the tears that threaten to spill. “You don’t get to do this, Killian,” I tell him. “You don’t get to waltz back into my life whenever you want. If you’re letting me go, then let me go. Give me a chance to try and find some kind of normalcy. You’ve broken me, and if I don’t get to have you, then you don’t get to have any part of me.”

“It’s not that simple,” he says. “Letting go . . . It’s not something I know how to do. I know I was the one to push you away, and despite how I feel, I have no choice but to stand by that. For your sake and for mine. This cannot work between us, not without consequence, and I refuse to put your life at risk for my own selfish desires. But for you, I will try. I will let go and give you the chance to rebuild your life.”

My brows furrow, really taking in his words. “You told me this morning that we couldn’t work because our relationship had progressed to a point where it was no longer beneficial for you, but that’s not true, is it?” I ask, sitting up a little straighter. “This is because of Monica. Because she hired some asshole to try and take me out.”

He nods. “Partly.”

Anger burns through me, and I pull myself back from him, scrambling off the bed and grabbing the blanket to wrap around my naked body. “That’s bullshit. Be honest for a change. You told me you were a man of your word, so give it to me straight for once. Why did you send me away?”

“Because I can’t protect you like this, Chiara,” he growls, throwing himself to his feet and reaching for his pants. He quickly pulls them on, does up the fly, but leaves the button hanging free. “This world . . . You’re not suitable for it. You’re a fighter, and you’re everything that I need, but it’s not enough. This world will destroy you. Just standing at my side automatically paints a target on your back, and I thought I could handle it. I thought I was okay knowing that at any time you could be taken from me, but I’m not. I can’t do it. The thought of losing you like that . . . I can’t fucking do it, Chiara.”

He’s losing it, the panic quickly overwhelming him, and I make my way toward him, gripping his arms and forcing him to meet my eyes. “I’m right here, Killian. Nobody can get to me here. I’m okay.”

He presses his lips into a tight line as he pulls me against his chest and holds me tight. “I can’t protect you. I’m sorry, Sweet Angel. If there were a way I could guarantee your safety, I would, but I just can’t do it to you. I need you to distance yourself. Take off and start a new life, far away from me and my enemies. You have the world at your feet. You can do anything you want.”

“But all I want is you.”

Killian lets out a heavy breath and sits on the edge of my bed as I stand between his legs, holding on to his strong shoulders. “You deserve a life that isn’t like mine. A life of massacres and hitmen isn’t what I want for you. You shouldn’t have to learn to fear the man you love, and I should never have asked you for that.”

Silence pulses between us as I feel that invisible string between us begin to burn, and as the heaviness weighs down on us, he pulls me onto his lap. “I will leave you alone, Angel. I will give you the freedom to start over, but just know that if you call me, I will come. If you feel unsafe, I will be here, but I cannot guarantee that I will be capable of walking away from you again. If you call, be sure.”

I swallow over the lump in my throat and nod, the weight of his words resting on my soul. “You know, when you told me last night that you wanted me to truly be your wife, I’ve never wanted anything more. I thought we were really starting our lives together.”

“You don’t know how badly I wish it could have been so,” he tells me. “There’s just one thing I need from you.” My brows furrow, and I meet his stare as I wait for him to continue. “Tell me, Chiara. Tell me what it is you’ve been so afraid of where Monica is concerned. I know you’ve been hesitant to share, but I don’t understand why. There’s more to this than you’ve disclosed.”

A spark of fear catches light inside my chest, and I lean into him, brushing my lips over his, wishing I was able to tell him what he needs to know, but just because I no longer live in his home doesn’t mean I’m free from Sergiu’s threats, and that’s not a risk I’m willing to take. Especially now that I’m out here on my own.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, hating to let him down again, but if I could give him the tools to discover for himself, maybe everything might be okay. “I wish I could tell you, but it’s too much of a risk. All I can say is that perhaps it’s time for a review of your surveillance footage. That should give you the answers you’re looking for.”

His brows furrow and he reluctantly nods. “Okay, Angel,” he says, standing and balancing me back on my feet. “Let’s not drag this out. I need to leave.”

I can’t hold on a second longer as the tears finally win the battle and begin rolling down my cheeks, and all I can do is watch as he leans in and kisses me one last time. “Goodbye, my love,” he murmurs as those dark eyes capture mine, and then just like that, he turns and walks away, closing the door behind him.

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