Page 71 of The One I Left Behind

He shakes his head and laughs, pulling down a track that’s just two tire marks through a line of trees.

A clearing comes into view, and I smile, seeing the stacks of lumber on the ground. I turn to look at him, but he doesn’t react, instead parking next to the area where I assume he’ll be building his house.

Laurel told me at the softball game that rumors were spreading about the two of us and that everyone thinks that Ben buying lumber means he’ll be sticking around. But I didn’t want to ask him and put him on the spot. I figured he’d share when he wanted to, and now I think he is.

He puts the truck in park and looks at me. “As you probably guessed, this is my house that’s going to be built.”

I step out of the truck, and he meets me by the stacks of wood. “Sick of waking up to your dad and his dates?”

He wraps his arms around my waist, resting his chin on my head. “Part of it, but”—his hands land on my hips and he turns me to face him—“I want a permanent place here.”

I smile. I’ve waited a long time for him to say he wants to stay in Willowbrook, but now I’m at a loss for words.

“Before you say anything, I know you have the bar exam results coming, and you said before that you wanted to interview in big cities. That you wanted to leave Willowbrook.”

I don’t tell him I’m questioning all that now. “I?—”

“I’m not asking you to give up any of that. I just want you to know that I want us. I want a future together, and me building this house hopefully helps you trust that I’m not going anywhere. I’m right where I want to be.”

I step away from him, and his hands fall to his sides. Turning away to gather my thoughts, I stare at the lumber. This is everything I’ve ever wanted to hear from him. But a part of me is still afraid something better will come along—a job, an opportunity, something.

“What about the football analyst job?”

“I can do that from anywhere. Fly in and out. But, as crazy as it sounds, I’m really enjoying coaching. So much is up in the air with Coach Marks. He’s doing well, but he brought up retirement to me last week. I got to thinking…”

“Are you telling me you want to stay in Willowbrook and coach football?”

He shrugs. “I’m saying I enjoy coaching way more than I thought I would.” He steps up to me and takes my hand, pulling me in. “Talk to me. What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking it’s a pretty big change in your way of thinking. I’m wondering if I went to law school for nothing. I’m thinking how much I love everything you’re saying.”

His cocky grin emerges. “First of all, it is a change, but it’s always been you. I lost my way once, and I’ll never do it again. Second, you didn’t go to law school for nothing. I can find a coaching position wherever you land. Third, I love you.”

“Oh, Ben.” I sigh, unable to process those three words falling from his mouth.

“I went out and lived my dream of becoming a pro. But I never felt fulfilled. It was because of you. So much of me was still in Willowbrook with you. You’re my future. Location doesn’t matter as long as I’m with you. If this house has to be where we stay when we visit my family, so be it.”

Unable to say anything, I push up on my toes and kiss him. He grips my waist and tugs me to him, deepening the kiss. It’s not until he pulls back and his thumb runs along my cheek that I realize I’m crying.

“This is a good thing.” He laughs, brushing away more tears.

“I know. It is. But we have an uphill battle. We have Clayton, for one. Plus, I mean, you just got back. I don’t want to be the reason you leave. Your family…”

I know how happy they are to have him back.

“And we’ll deal with it all. Together. But tonight…” He takes my hand and leads me down a path past where his house will be built.

I hear the trickling of water before we arrive at the river’s edge.

“Ben.”

He smiles.

He re-created the scene from our last night together. The pillows. The blankets. The tealights sprinkled around.

He turns to me and takes my hands. “I want a do-over. I know we can’t rewind time, and we wouldn’t want to anyway. You wouldn’t have Clayton, and we were two naive kids the last time we were here. But I feel it, Gillian. This is our time. I want to put the past behind us and look toward the future, starting tonight.”

My chest feels as if it might burst from happiness. More tears stream down my face, and I use my palm to wipe them away. “Jeez.”

---