I turn to find Laurel leaning against the wall with her arms crossed, eyebrows raised above her dark-framed glasses, disappointment lining her face.
“I’m sorry.”
She turns to head back into the storefront of her bakery. “I told you that you should’ve fled town for the day.”
I follow her and sit on one of the stools. The bakery and coffeehouse are completely desolate due to the King of Willowbrook’s arrival. “I just wanted to catch a glimpse of him. In person.”
“And cause yourself more heartbreak?” She puts a smiley face cookie on a plate and slides it over to me.
“The last thing I need is sugar.” I push the plate away, but I’m fooling myself. I’m going to eat the cookie and probably a cupcake too.
“Sugar makes the heart hurt less.” She rearranges her case of baked goods.
“You should put that on the window.” She gives me a look, and I relent. “I’m not heartbroken. It’s been a long time.”
She peeks at me under her glasses through the glass case. “But you snuck out to catch a sighting of him?”
“I’m not sixteen sneaking out of my bedroom window. I’m a grown woman who just wanted to see what her ex-boyfriend looked like. It’s not that weird.”
“Except most women’s high school sweethearts weren’t professional football players they could watch every Sunday for more than a decade. Not to mention, with this new invention called the internet, you can actually search him.” She closes the glass case and puts some cookies in a box that I guarantee she’s going to tell me to take home to Clayton.
“Nowadays you can google anyone. I just…”
There’s no explanation as to why I didn’t stay holed up in Laurel’s bakery. I told myself a thousand times to ignore all the hype surrounding Ben’s return. That I’d moved on. I told myself I didn’t care. They’re all lies, though, because I do care.
I swear, the minute his dad’s truck rolled past the county line, my throat closed up, and those butterflies I thought had died reemerged. Ben rarely returns to Willowbrook, and the small number of times he has, he has never left their ranch. I’d hear one of his cousins or brothers remark casually about how he’d been home and always in the past tense. Eventually, I became numb to the pain when I realized I wasn’t important enough on Ben’s list to see. Then again, I can’t blame him. Not after all that went down between us.
“Do you think he googled you?” Laurel’s eyes light up so bright, my next words almost kill me.
“Have you seen the women he’s dated?”
She stops with the purple iced cupcake she was putting in a box in the air and glares. “Don’t you dare do that.”
I love Laurel. She’s a girl’s girl. The funny thing is, we weren’t that close in high school. She was a cheerleader, and I was… well, not. But we went to the same community college and have been friends ever since.
“I’m not… I’m confident and happy where I am. But thank God we started that kickboxing class this year.”
“Gillian.” She sighs and shakes her head. She stops what she’s doing and rounds the counter before sitting on the stool next to me. “I get it. I do.”
Her hand lands on my forearm, and I don’t dare look up. I’d rather have her yell at me than this. The pity.
I’ve been on the receiving end of everyone in Willowbrook’s pitying expressions for the past fourteen years.
There’s Gillian, the girl Ben Noughton left behind.
Can’t believe she actually thought they’d make it.
Can you believe what she did?
I’ve heard the whispers and the rumors. The first few years were harder than they are now. I think our past moved to the back of people’s minds until Bruce Noughton made the big announcement at bingo that his middle son was returning home. Then all the whispers started again. Hell, I’m pretty sure three-quarters of this town thinks Clayton is actually Ben’s son.
“Gillian?”
I blink and smile at Laurel, picking her hand off my arm. “I’m good. Fine. I mean… I don’t want to talk about it.”
She opens her mouth, but the bell on the door rings. We both look, surprised to have a customer while the parade is going on.
“It’s ridiculous.” My son, Clayton, grabs a chair and sits at a table near the window.