Page 86 of Lost In London

Moving around the counter, I fully took her in and felt even more jaded for her. The last time I was here, Dove was glammed up from head to toe. This Dove was still beautiful but hiding behind her clothes. Hiding behind dark colors and baggy clothes. I remember this phase too. As wild and bountiful as her hair appeared to be there were small tangled knots on the ends of her coils. Mismatched socks. She was hanging on enough for her sanity.

Feeling a chill run up my spine, I turned around and sighed in relief seeing Quest and Quincey outside talking. Of course, he wouldn’t be too far from her.

“Probably a little over two months.” Damn. The same time when Elgin started harassing me. “It started with texts first.” She exhaled a shaky breath sitting next to me. “Then came the random calls from blocked numbers. Then came the emails with pictures of us from that night.” Her head dropped and her shoulders shook. “He’s deranged and I don’t want to run anymore. I don’t understand why he’s doing this.” I swallowed hard, blinking my tears away.

Everything she thought and felt, I knew her pain because the feeling never stopped.

Elgin and his brother had a death wish thinking they could harass their victims and get away with it.

“I-I know what happened to you, London.” Dove reached for my hand. “Quest told me and I can’t help but feel like it’s my fault because had I said something back then you wouldn’t know what Elgin’s torture and venom taste like. Stopping Donovan could have stopped Elgin. I’m so sorry, London. I really am.” She released the hardest sob I ever heard.

All I could do was hold her and do what had been done over me. Pray. Her sobs felt familiar because I used to cry that same soul-shattering cry that crippled you. Made you defenseless and hit the floor shaking.

“I got her, London.” Blinking my vision clear, Quest scooped her up in his arms and carried her to the back.

“Are you okay?” My protector had me in his arms before I could blink.

I wasn’t okay.

At all.

“Um, I know we planned to go back to your house after we left here but do you…”

He silenced me with a kiss. A kiss that was soft but firm and told me that he understood. “You don’t need to explain. Go where you need to go and then come back to me.”

In this moment I needed something, rather someone familiar because I felt myself about to lose my shit. Lose my shit the same way Dove just spiraled and as much as Quincey provided me with a safe space to be vulnerable and protected, I needed to see my other person. I needed to see Cassian. I needed to be around the girls and Cashton.

“Thank you. Thank you for understanding.” I hugged him as best as my shaking body allowed. I could tell he wanted to say and do more but because this situation was fragile, he gave me grace and I appreciated that.

Usually, I sat in the back whenever Benny drove me around. This time I was a sitting passenger anxiously bouncing my legs, rocking, and trying to keep it together. I’ve never felt anger so charged like this. Angry that these men were out here terrorizing women and living a grand life while we continued to suffer.

Lord, please forgive me for what I’m about to do.

I was tired of being a sitting duck. I know what God had asked me to do but seeing Dove barely hanging on. Knowing everything I knew. What if there were other women? What gave them the right to think they could continue to do this and not have to suffer consequences?

Enough was enough.

Me: I’M READY

There was no going back. I sent the text and things were about to fall in motion.

“Thank you, Benny.” He barely put the truck in park before I was hopping out. My hands started shaking trying to get my key in the lock to unlock the door. “Dammit.” I think that was the third time I dropped them before I finally got it unlocked, leaving the door wide open as I took off in the house in search of who I needed.

“Lolo, you’re back.”

“Papa is going to give you a pop-pop for running in the house.”

I’d have to greet Tai and Melly later.

He wasn’t sitting in his recliner downstairs or out on the back deck smoking. Taking the stairs two at a time, I ran in our bedroom and froze seeing him standing before the TV with Aladdin on pause. My bottom lip trembled, taking in the space he created. My favorite PJs were laid out on the bed. Favorite candles that I loved to smell when I was in a mood were lit. My lavender and oatmeal bath soap drifted in the air. He even ran me a bath.

“Cass. What…” I couldn’t even talk. My tongue was just as heavy as my shoulders and heart felt.

“I felt that you needed me, Lo. I told you. I got you forever. Come here.” His signature mug and creased brows broke the dam and my tears poured. Dear God, I didn’t know it would hurt so bad to suppress and hold in my own sobs when Dove broke down. But seeing Cassian, my person, I released.

By the time I made it to him my legs gave out and he caught me as he always had. “I got you, London.” And he did.

He had me and I had Dove.

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