Page 22 of Damaged

Forgot that I’d be facing another long day of pain and bitterness. There’d be no more dangerous missions to execute to keep my country safe, no guys to fuck, and no brothers-in-arms to reminisce with.

Luckily, that last part hadn’t been much of an issue since I’d rarely left my house to begin with. I’d spent nearly every cent of the savings I’d had at the time to buy the twenty-five acres of land that included what could barely be called a small two-bedroom house with a large shed that could have been swept over by a stiff wind. But the crowning glory of the place I’d finally come to truly accept as mine was the little gem of a boat that had come with the property. The boat, which actually wasn’t all that small, may not have been much to look at but the cabin cruiser had been and still was my saving grace. In short, I didn’t have to worry about nosy neighbors showing up on my doorstep unannounced and even if they did, the boat provided me with a quick escape as well as the only true peace I’d ever really had.

And now I’d brought a stranger into my sanctuary.

A young man I knew next to nothing about.

A young man who kissed like a dream and deserved a man who knew how lucky he was to wake up next to Silver every morning and fall asleep with him wrapped in his arms every night.

A young man I’d agreed to “pay” for the pleasure of his company for an entire night.

God, the things I could show him.

The things he could do to me…

“Fuck,” I grumbled under my breath as I shuffled to the porch steps. Steps were a particular enemy of mine but at the moment I was kind of grateful for them because not only did they require all of my focus, they eliminated all thoughts of pleasure as the pain once again took hold.

“Do you need help?” I heard someone ask from behind me.

Yes.

“No,” I snapped.

Despite my protest, which would have been enough to stop most men from coming anywhere near me, a slim but strong arm went around my waist. Silver took advantage of my surprise and ducked his head under my arm so that he was bracing my left side.

“I don’t need?—”

“Yeah, I heard you,” Silver returned, his voice even and patient. I could have pushed him away, but the reality was that his support meant that there was less strain on my back as I lifted my right foot.

Humiliation swamped my entire system and by the time we reached the top steps, I just wanted to crawl into my bed and hide my shame in pills and alcohol.

“I’m fine,” I growled as I extricated my body from Silver’s.

I didn’t look at him because I told myself I didn’t give a shit if I’d hurt his feelings or whatever. Let him go wander off somewhere and lick his wounds. That would definitely make my life easier.

I began to fish the house keys out of my jacket pocket, but I was amazed to see that they were already in Silver’s hand, and he was working the lock on the ratty-looking front door. By the time I reached it, he had it wide open. I ignored the need to rip him a new one for basically picking my pocket and instead focused every ounce of strength I had left on getting my feet over the threshold. I wanted to cry because my bedroom still seemed like it was miles away, but then Silver’s arm was around my waist again.

“We’re almost there, Dalton,” he said softly. “Just focus on the sound of my voice, okay?”

So that was what I did. I had no clue what he was actually saying, but the lyrical notes in his voice fascinated me and I clung to them just like Silver had told me to. Moments later, I was crossing the threshold of my bedroom.

I didn’t complain when Silver eased me on the bed and began working my shoes off. Instead, I reached for the bottle of whiskey sitting on my nightstand and took several healthy swigs. Next, I snagged the bottle of pills that were calling my name and offering me the peace I was so desperate for. I dumped enough pills in my hand to fill the smallest part of my palm, but I didn’t bother counting them before I threw them down my throat and chased them with another swig of whiskey.

The alcohol warmed my body, but I knew it would be a little while before the oxycontin did its job. For my trip to Vermont, I’d only allowed myself to take a different, milder painkiller. But oxycontin was my saving grace. As more and more warmth filled my body, I was only slightly aware that Silver was talking to me. His voice sounded muffled, but I did my best to listen.

“Lift up,” he ordered.

I wasn’t sure what he wanted me to lift but when he tugged at my jeans, I had my answer. I should have told him I’d be fine with the pants on but something inside me had me following his order.

The drugs, probably.

It was too soon for them to be taking effect, so it was probably the alcohol. With that thought in my mind, I took another long drag of the amber-colored liquid before setting the bottle on the nightstand.

After the jeans were gone, my shirt was next. The whiskey had dulled my senses but not enough to ignore things like Silver’s fingertips grazing my shoulders or his neck pressing against mine as he leaned into to me so he could slide the button-down shirt off my back.

“Smell good,” I heard myself whisper under my breath. Thankfully, Silver didn’t hear me because he didn’t respond in any kind of way.

“Lie down on your stomach.” If Silver’s hands hadn’t been urging me to do just that, I would have thought the drugs had finally started to kick in and I was hearing things. But no, Silver’s warm hands gently eased me so that I was lying face down on the bed. I expected him to leave at that point, and I wanted to tell him to take the money I’d promised him from my wallet and go, but he surprised me again when his fully clothed body straddled my ass.

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