Page 87 of Pawn

“You mean after I actually graduate?”

“And I’m still in school and Nate’s in university and Allie goes off to New York with Lea?” I blink. “Who will you have?”

I know what she’s getting at but I’m not saying it. I can’t trust him when all we have is drama, more trauma and dead bodies.

“Who will you have to love?” Willow asks.

Rolling my eyes, my head drops to the side. “You gonna say it?”

She takes my other hand, looking taller and poised and while Willow was a mess when we pulled into Eden, she’s ten times the girl she was back then.

“I’m saying, I’ve seen you moping around school and the Perez house for the last few weeks like Damien died.”

“What?” My brows scrunch, a pang in my heart. “Why would you say that?”

“See? You care about him and if he did die you’d regret whatever it is you’re doing.” My sister widens her big brown eyes, waiting for me to protest but she’s right. The thought of King dying kills me. That doesn’t change what he did. “I know we’ve had a rough go.” Willow reaches behind her, picking up sparkling bronze powder. She pats at my cheeks with a pink sponge. “But you don’t have to keep punishing yourself for everything. Just because Damien isn’t easy, doesn’t mean he’s not exactly what you need.”

She glances at my eyes to see if I’m listening. “And what’s that, Low?”

Ignoring my sass she continues, “Someone that doesn’t take your BS. Someone that’s there for you no matter what, even if it’s not always in the most conventional of ways.” She smiles at her work before meeting my eyes, bopping my nose with the sponge. “And someone that puts that smile back on my sister’s face.”

“I can’t believe we’re going to prom,” Allie leaves the bathroom with Lea behind her, breaking Willow out of her monologue.

“I can’t believe I’m going to prom with you,” Lea says, eyeing Allie in a purple velvet suit. “In that. You look like you fell out of a Prince album.” Lea looks down at her gold poofy dress with a huge smile. “While I look like the belle of the ball.”

Allie snorts. “You look like a gold cotton ball. While my outfit is a showstopper.”

“You’re a showstopper.” A compliment from Lea surprises me, even if it is to her girlfriend. Allie blinks, surprised too before she bites her lip, pulling Lea’s arm over her shoulder. “We’ll be right back.”

Lea squeals as the door slams. “My dress!”

“C’mon Jameson,” I say to the bottle in my hand. “It’s time for us to get some alone time too.” My phone buzzes on Allie’s dresser, Damien’s name lighting up the phone.

Willow rolls her eyes. “Life doesn’t have to be depressing for you.” She spritzes some perfume on me and I’m not sure why. Not like I’ll be dancing with anyone tonight. The minute I get to prom, I plan on finding Isaac to loan me some weed. Okay, give me some weed. I don’t have any more money after I bought this outfit. Not until I get a summer job anyway. And not at Cindy’s.

“You don’t have to drown on your own,” Willow says, something wiser than her years. I’ve been doubting her this entire time. My sister can hold her own. She holds out her pinky. “Promise me you’ll have fun tonight.”

Linking my pinky with hers I smile. “I promise I love you.”

“I love you too, Jo,” she says with another eye roll. She points to my mouth. “Red gloss. The cherry on the pie. I’ll be right back.”

Ignoring the whispers, giggles and moans from the bathroom, I do the stupid thing and look at my phone.

Damien: 11:11. I’ll be waiting.

Twenty-Two

Damien

Prom is a joke.

Hell, everything is a joke without Jo.

But I’m standing by my words.

If she’s not in the library tonight, I’m toppling my pieces. Calling it quits.

“Dude, this is prom,” Christian says, his new girl fixing his tie in a green dress that matches his suit. It’s been a new girl every week with him lately, this one I recognize from a hookup freshman year. “It’s not a funeral.”

---