Page 72 of I Stop Somewhere Waiting For You

My fingers flex, desperate to hold on, though my brain wills them to reluctantly release her. Jonsie steps back in response, placing more space than I’d prefer between us, but allowing me to take in her full form.

Fuck.

The fabric of her red summer dress clings to her in all the right places, accentuating the swell of her breasts, cinching at the waist before falling loosely at her hips and ending just below her ass. Her light-wash distressed denim jacket hangs open more so on the left side, exposing the delicate spaghetti strap on her shoulder. My gaze rakes over her and I almost crack a smile at the sight of her slip-on Vans, bright white with fine line images of little aliens and UFOs all over them.

I say ‘almost’ because it’s too hard to smile when I’m mourning the loss of the life I could have had with the siren standing before me. Everything about her is perfect. And it was mine once upon a time.

“Well,” she speaks, and I’m suddenly aware I’m just awkwardly gaping at her, “I should be going.”

I panic. It’s not enough time. My brain frantically scans some way to stall her, some impossible way to freeze time so I can just stare at her a moment longer. Then it happens. She turns to the right, and I catch a glimpse of the bishop behind her ear.

I crack, my whole body screaming to lay claim to her. My arm snaps forward, wrapping around her tiny waist and spinning her into me. Her chest slams into mine as I lock her against me in an act of sheer desperation, preparing for her resistance.

But she doesn’t pull away.

I feel her body relax against me and I decide to press my luck, raising my other hand to stroke her face. She leans into it, her eyes slipping closed as she focuses on my touch. I forgot how soft she is. I’m staring at the spot on her cheek where my thumb is caressing her skin when her name involuntarily slips free.

“Jones,” I sigh in relief, unable to believe she’s actually in my arms right now.

Her eyes flutter open, glancing up at me from under those long dark lashes, and I’m transported back to that first night in the apartment. The night I told her I loved her.

Take her and run, the voice inside me screams and, for a moment, I seriously consider it.

But like all good things in my life, it comes crashing down.

My phone rings, sabotaging the only moment resembling anything close to happiness I’ve experienced in the past four years. J’s gaze breaks from mine, her eyes casting downward. Mine follow, wincing at the sight of the name on the screen.

Shit.

I release her just as she plants her hands against my chest, taking a giant step back. I shudder at the loss of her body pressed against me, my breath hitching sharp on an exhale.

“You should get that. Don’t wanna keep ‘Wifey’ waiting upstairs for you.” Shoving off me, she spins to fall in step with the foot traffic of the sidewalk.

“Jonsie!” I find my voice a moment too late. She’s already gone, lost to me all over again.

The phone rings once more and I grit my teeth as I bend over this time to pick it up. “What?!” I bite out as I bring it to my ear.

“Well, hello to you too, Maverick.” Her voice makes my fucking skin crawl.

“I’m busy, Amber. What is it?” I make my way toward the building to head upstairs.

“Are you coming home today?”

“I am home. I just got in,” I respond, though I know it’s not what she means.

“No,” she scoffs, “I mean to Hydetown.”

“No. I am not coming to the Cathedral today.” I make it a point to refer to my house in Hydetown by name, rather than as ‘home.’ I’ve always been upfront with Amber about this shit, but sometimes she needs a reminder.

“Mav, I haven’t seen you in days.”

“Is there a point to this conversation?” My question comes out cold.

“Apparently not,” she sighs. “Bye—”

I disconnect the call before she can finish.

I don’t know why she even acts like this shit bothers her. Amber’s always been about the status, and that’s what she got out of this deal. She gets to be recognized as my girlfriend and assumes the perks that come with it—a car, an allowance, living at the Cathedral. However, I explained the rules when this started. This is a transaction, nothing more.

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