Page 65 of Without You, Scotch and Sammy 2

For the second time in my life, Sammy Ricardo makes me sick. “Don’t bullshit a bullshitter, Samantha. You think I don’t know the Romeo and Juliet laws? Did you forget I went to law school? Do you think I didn’t look this shit up myself? Your flimsy excuse doesn’t fix shit. I’m not a slave to you anymore.”

“No, I know about the law now! But I didn’t know when I was eighteen and scared. He was really fucking convincing, Sam. He told me he’d have your dad kicked off the force, because his son will be charged with sex offenses. He said he’d have Marc and Kari removed from your home, because their foster brother would be charged with sex offenses.”

“What?”

She nods her head victoriously, as though finally getting me to stop and listen is a war won. “I was eighteen and I took the weight of you all on my shoulders. I didn’t want your dad to lose his job. I didn’t want Kari and Marc uprooted again. I was trading myself for them. I thought I was doing the right thing! And then the next thing I know, the baby is gone and my daddy was still threatening you. What else was I supposed to do?”

“You were supposed to stick to the plan!” I roar. “We had a plan and you went and took it all out of my hands! That’s not fair, Ricci. You fucked me over and you broke my fucking heart!”

“I broke my heart too,” she cries. “We both lost each other. We both lost the baby. We both lost that future. But you know what? You still had your family. You still had the guys. Your sister is still ready to throw down in the street for you even after all this time. But what do I have?” She slams her fist down on my chest. “I was alone, Sam! I lost all the family I knew. And I don’t mean my parents. I mean the family you promised me. I’ve spent the last thirteen years alone and miserable because I gave my heart to a boy who promised to cherish it, but when I needed it again, he never gave it back. I sat alone for years wallowing in my own guilt and loneliness. Yeah, you had a shitty time too, but you had someone there to hold your hand. I had no one!”

“You had your parents.”

“I had no one!” Tears roll down her cheeks and over cherry red lips. “I had the vows a teenage boy made to a teenage girl, a promise ring on one hand and a wedding band on the other. Then I had nothing but the echoes of something I’ll never be able to replicate.”

“Sammy--”

“I hated this town.” She hits me in the chest again. “I told you that from the start, but I was still giving you my everything. I wanted it all with you, Sam. I know I left. I know it was all my fault. I know I ruined your life. Shit! I ruined mine too.” She looks up at me with devastatingly sad eyes. “But my actions were never malicious. I was doing the best I could in a shitty situation, and I don’t deserve the hate. I don’t deserve to have my head kicked in in the street by your sister, or for Marc to be ready to crush me under his shoe. Everything I did was for you assholes.” She slams her fist down on my chest again. “I don’t deserve the hate, Sam. I deserve a fucking hug, because in thirteen years, the only man to even do that much was Angelo, and that was just this week.”

“Oh, Ricci--”

Tears stream down over her quivering lips. “I didn’t leave because I didn’t love you, Sam. I left because I did. I loved you with my whole heart, and I was trying to protect you.”

She pulls her hand back to hit me again, but I stop her, pinning her hand against my heart, then before I chicken out, I bend my neck and kiss her. She cries out in shock, her eyes pop wide with fear, but the salty tears on her tongue infiltrate my mouth instantly. I push her back and slam her against the fridge, jiggling glass jars on the top as the fridge literally moves from our momentum.

She whimpers in pleasure and pain, but when my hands go to her ass and lift, she moves with me without hesitation. I’ve wanted this for as long as I can remember, and even if it’s just one time, it’s more than I had a day ago.

I unlatch my mouth from hers for the quickest moment, and I use my hips to press her against the fridge. I roughly drag the pretty sweater over her head, catching her earrings and hair in the material, dragging out a quick cry of pain, but then my lips close over her bra covered nipples and she cries out for an entirely different reason.

My dick thickens and throbs between us, pressing against her warm core where I can feel the heat she’s putting out even through her jeans and mine.

I lift her from the fridge and spin us around, and walk half a dozen steps while kissing her with frenzied lips and teeth, but when she begins fumbling with my shirt, I slam her up against the wall just inside my living room. Her nails scrape along my stomach and ribs, pulling my shirt up and over my head, then with frantic breaths, she just stops and watches me.

Her chest rises and falls frantically, then her fingertips slowly trace along my collarbone, over my shoulders, then down onto my pecs. My skin breaks out in goosebumps from her touch. I was so sure I’d never have this again.

Fresh tears well in her eyes as her fingers brush over the chain that hangs in the center of my chest. She slips her finger through the loop of my wedding band, then looks up at me with that wobbling lip. I can’t talk about it, I can’t go back there, so I slam my lips over hers, tasting her tears and suckling on her tongue, and I begin walking.

“Sam--”

I shake my head. “Please don’t talk right now, Ricci. I don’t wanna rehash the past. I just wanna love you. Give me an hour before you rip my heart out again.”

I step into my room and toss her down roughly. The chain between her breasts bounces and taunts me. The light peeking through my curtains glints off her shiny gold band, and my heart hammers inside my chest.

I crawl on top of her and drag my jeaned leg along her most sensitive areas, and she whimpers and presses down for more friction. I run my hand slowly along her sensitized skin, ready to weep when I find those freckles on her chest – freckles that I’ve seen every night as I lay in the dark and think of her, but I was so sure I’d never see again in real life.

I kiss the tiny smattering of marked skin, then trail my lips across her chest until I find the ink that’s almost killed me with curiosity this past week. “I didn’t think you’d ever get ink, Ricci. You didn’t seem the type.”

I lave my tongue along her skin until I finally reach her collarbone. What I thought was a tiny wispy tattoo design turns into the very tips of soft wings. I lift her shoulder to get a closer look, even as her breath hitches and escapes sporadically. I follow the lines around and over her shoulder until I find the bird in flight, it’s wings made of musical notes, its body made up of the words ‘forever and ever.’

“Ricci…”

“Please kiss me again. I don’t wanna talk about it.”

I nod jerkily, swallowing to lubricate my suddenly parched throat, then my hand comes back to her shiny chain, pulling on it gently to bring her to me, then my teeth move to her lips in a desperate plea to the universe. Why is it so unfair? Why did it have to hurt us?

I mark her skin with my lips and teeth, scratching my stubble along her delicate flesh. My spare hand moves around her slim waist and comes up to tug at the clasp of her bra. My hips drop against her core, and we both groan at the contact.

We’ve been waiting more than a decade to find this again.

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