Page 34 of Mayhem

“You are a game, Serena. A prize to win. A bet that I want to win.” His eyes gleam with malice. At this moment, I can see why people fear him.

I close my eyes and turn my head to the side, trying to prevent the tears that threaten to fall. I feel so embarrassed and hurt. A bet? That’s all I am to them?

I feel his warm, wet tongue lick from my collarbone up to my jaw. He nips on it, and a whimper escapes me. I keep my eyes closed. Refusing to let him see how much he hurt me.

“Don’t worry, angel. I may want to win, but not tonight.” I feel the air whip around me as he pushes away. I open my eyes finally and see him retreating into the darkness. I want to fall to the ground and break, but he won’t ever make me feel like this again.

Evan destroyed me long ago, and I am finally building myself back up. I won’t break for him or any of the Kings. I hold my head up high as I walk back home. The cool, fresh air is the only thing keeping me in the moment. A game to them. A prize to win.

I am pathetic thinking any of them had any real feelings for me. They played their games, and they played them well. I fell for every line they gave me. Every act of kindness. Everything. Now I know the truth, and I won’t let them fool me anymore.

Their bet ends tonight, and so does my involvement with them. They all can fuck right off and never speak to me again. Midas may have been drunk, but I could see the honesty in his words. It’s probably the first time he has ever been honest with me.

The tattoo on my shoulder suddenly tingles. I touch it and remember why I got it. I am a queen. No man, not even a king, will make me feel small and worthless again.

I finally make it back to my street. I walk, ignoring that they all live beside me. I notice Odin sitting on his front porch, smoking a joint. His face lights up when he sees me. He gets up from his chair and walks down the few steps, ready to talk to me. I give him a deadly glare that stops him in his tracks. I walk up to the front door and turn around to see Odin at the end of my laneway.

I open the door and take a step inside. He tries to follow me, but I slam the door and lock it, cutting him off.

I lean against the door and slide to the ground, finally letting the tears out. I may say I am done with them, but I know that’s not true. They may have lied about their feelings, but I didn’t.

Serena

On Monday morning, the last thing I feel like doing is going to school.

I spent the weekend in bed, just thinking about everything. I never imagined my life would be this bizarre.

The conversation I had with Midas is the main thing I have been focusing on. I am a game to them, a prize to win. None of them cared about me. I think of Odin and Zeus and how they treated me. I want to refuse what Midas said. That there is no way they could fake how they acted to me, but why would Midas say that if it wasn’t true?

I feel so broken-hearted. I truly believed that there was something between us, but I was naïve. I let the first boys that made me feel something into my heart. I gave them a piece of me, and they destroyed it. Never again. I am not a pawn in their messed-up games. I don’t deserve that.

Mom pokes her head into my room before she leaves for work. I’m still in a ball on my bed. She walks over and kisses my head before leaving. I talked to her this weekend about what happened with the Kings. I told her about their bet, and I thought she was going to go on a killing spree.

The silence in the house is deafening. All I can hear are the thoughts in my head, the hurt and pain. The overwhelming urge to get this feeling out of me is drowning me. I walk into my bathroom and sit in front of the toilet. Tears falling down my face, my body shaking.I can’t let them do this to me, too.I repeatedly recite that mantra until I feel the strength to leave the bathroom.

I crawl back into bed and cry. I cry until I fall asleep.

I wake up from my not-so-great nap when my phone beeps.

Three dots show up and disappear. Reappear and disappear again. He’s gone.Good.I walk into the living space and turn on the TV. There isn’t much to watch during the day, so I turn on an old movie that my mom and I used to watch together. A Knight’s Tale with Heath Ledger was one of my mom’s favorite movies. We watched it so many times that I can practically recite every line.

I wrap a blanket around myself and curl into a ball on the couch.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

What the fuck? I get up and open the door to three very pissed-off faces. I slam the door shut before anyone can react and lock it.

“Open the door, Serena!” Midas yells through the door. I ignore him and sit back down on the couch, turning the volume up loud enough that I can’t hear his words anymore.

Nothing is ever so simple, and my phone continuously goes off. All three are texting me. Midas, being his usual demanding self, telling me to open the door. Odin asks me nicely to open the door. Zeus is asking what is wrong.

He is good. I will give him that. The nice guy act is something he has perfected. I open a new message and add all three of them to it.

I hit send and waited a few minutes. The banging on my door starts. I can hear screaming, but I have no clue what they are saying. They could be yelling at each other or me. I don’t know and don’t care. I make a mental note to change my number today. I’ll head out when they leave and go see my mom. Get her to change it so I don’t have to deal with them anymore. I know I could block them, but knowing them, they would find a way around that. At least if I have a new number, no one can contact me anymore.

There is one last bang on the door and then silence. I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding in. I hate that it has come to this, but it is what it is. At least they know that I know the truth. I won’t play their stupid games. My phone dings and the name that pops up is the last person I want to talk to.

I turn my phone on silent and toss it on the table. At least I won’t be tempted to text back if I can’t reach it. I curl up on the couch under a blanket and continue watching my movie.

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