Page 14 of Consorting with Romance

Someone whimpered. God. It was me. His lips moved; soft, slow, delicate. Barely a movement at all. They parted and my bottom lip was caught between his. Another whimper. God, it was me again. I let myself reach out; my fingertips brushing the side of his hip. He stepped closer. His lips no longer touched mine, and suddenly our foreheads were pressed together as we fought to catch our breath. Fuck. I could come. I didn’t.

I cried. I felt the tears threaten and I fought them. It was a battle I quickly lost. It was too much. I slowly pulled my head away from his. The golden, happy eyes that smiled into mine darkened instantly at what he saw. I shook my head as more tears fell. In his concern, those caramel eyes had become a deep, endless brown. He shifted his weight back, but his fingers never left my neck.

“Ash?” Was all he managed. Soft, and shaky, and questioning.

I wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anything. But I had no other skills. No way to make a living. Not enough money to retire. I had to keep my job.

“You don’t want me.”

There was confusion in his eyes now; hurt, desire. His eyes still wanted me.

“No one wants to come home to someone like me, Jess.” My whispered words were barely audible.

Honeyed eyes flashed brightly. There was almost anger there. No. Pity.Desire? I didn’t know. His fingers tightened around my neck, and he crushed his mouth to mine. It wasall-encompassing and more intimate than any sexual act I’d ever performed. There was nothing other than his lips andhis fingertips digging into my neck as he pulled me tight. I let my arms slip around his waist and pulled his body close, my mouth sliding away from his kiss as I buried my face in the bend of his neck. Both of his arms were around me, holding me close, fingertips wandering my back.

His whispered words rolled along my skin as he spoke against my shoulder.

“I want you. I’ve wanted you since you opened the door for my interview. I thought it was a crush. I thought I’d get over it. I didn’t. I told myself your friendship was enough. It’s not.”

He pulled away, locking his eyes to mine. Glowing, molten amber.

His fingers dug into my back as he rambled, “I can’t apologize enough if you don’t want this and I’ve ruined our friendship, but I think you might want me too. I didn’t know it was possible to want someone like this. You’re all I think about. In a sexual way, yes, but more than that.”

Fingers brushed along my temple to push back a stray lock of hair that had fallenacross my cheek.

“I want to talk to you about my day, every day. I want to brush this damn piece of hair back from your eyes a dozen times a day. Not because the way it’s always falling out of place isn’t sexy; it is.But because I want to touch you and it’s a reason to. I want to lay in your arms while I study. I want to hear about your day…”

He paused and chuckled a bit,“…ok not too much about your day, but I just want...you. I don’t care about your job. For Gods’ sakes I’m the one that changes the sheets, I know all too well what you do, and I don’t care. I want you. I want you. I can’t imagine ever wanting anyone else again. I know that is an insane thing to say to a boss and a friend, and I realize I might be fired and friendless now but I ...”

I believed him. I tightened my arms around his back and let my lips quiet his rambling. They moved gently; like either of us might break at anything more. I’d never known this before. Of all the people I’d held, all the lips I’d kissed, none felt the like his. When we finally parted, we were both panting deeply again.

I smiled softly. “I guess Cherie is going to miss our first date.”

His fingers wandered my jaw as his eyes smiled into mine. “She is indeed.”

Jesse

I’d kissed him.

God. I’d kissed him.

I’d tried not to. I knew he was lonely, and I didn’t want to take advantage of him. I knew he needed a friend. I hadn’t intended to say anything. I hadn’t intended to touch him…to kiss him.

His home was amazing. It was as if he’d taken everything he was; his hopes, his dreams, his personality and poured them into his rooms. They were quiet and understated and beautiful. It was complicated to grow berries and citrus in our region, even with the equipment available on a farm. It took time and care and patience. We had never attempted such a thing at home. Yet, Ash had berries and citrus trees in his back yard. The love and attention he gave them was more than obvious. He had so much to offer, so much no one seemed to notice. I don’t think he realized just how extraordinary he was.

How was I supposed to just stand there laughing with him at those burnt pieces of charcoal that used to be rolls and not stare at the way his head fell back and the wrinkles that appeared beside his jade green eyes? How was I supposed to ignore the heat that radiated from his body and sunk into my skin and the way his fingers hung loose beside his hip, curling and twitching lightly as if they wanted nothing other than to curl up in mine?

He’d kissed me back.

Ok, he’d cried when I kissed him, which isn’t really the response you want when you accidentally can’t stop yourself from kissing someone.

But then he stopped crying. He’d stopped and his arms had wrapped around me and pulled me so tightly into his body that it felt as if I closed my eyes and really tried, we might merge into one being.

He’d kissed me back. He’d kissed me and kissed me until nothing existed except the softness of his lips and the way his fingers dug into my hips. He’d surrounded me until nothing existed outside of the way his scent enveloped me, peppermint and sandalwood and salt mixed with the acrid remnants of burnt bread. In a single moment, he became everything.

When we eventually pulled apart to warm dinner,we found ourselves unwilling to stray too far from one another. Neither of us seemed entirely convinced that what had happened between us had been real, or that the other wouldn’t change his mind. It was several hours before we made it to dessert. As I pulled the last of my bags from the fridge, he leaned over my shoulder, and I reveled in the fact that he’d chosen to stand so close. If I’d leaned slightly, his body would have pressed against my back.

“I don’t usually do dessert, but I think today is most definitely an exception. What did you make?” His voice sounded light. Light and carefree and almost nervous. He sounded as if he were afraid his words might break the enchantment that had fallen over us.

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