Page 50 of Waiting to Love You

“Hands off,” I grumble, and grab the bag from her reach and open it. The scent of my favorite sandwich fills the room, making my stomach growl. “I guess I’ve gotten my appetite back.”

“Good. You need to take better care of yourself, Bri. We’re worried about you.”

“I know,” I whisper, reaching into the bag and grabbing a few fries before shoving them into my mouth.

I couldn’t stop the tears from falling when Seth handed me the bag of food with my favorite sandwich, which I only mentioned once a few days ago. He has been asking me anything and everything he can think of, and this tells me he’s been paying attention to my answers.

“Are you still planning to tell him about Rebekah?” Audrey’s voice brings me back to the present.

“I don’t know.” I sigh as I reach into the bag and pull out my sandwich. I unwrap it and moan as I take a huge bite. I didn’t even realize how hungry I was until this moment. “I’ll be surprised if I didn’t already send him running for the hills with my hot and cold behavior. He’ll probably never speak to me again.”

She shakes her head. “Yeah, like your tears could scare that man away. Besides, I consider sleep deprivation a valid reason for any erratic or emotional behavior.”

Rebekah’s awful night a few nights ago was just the beginning. She’s slowly getting better, but between her needing to be held most of the night in order to sleep and my having to run the studio, to say I’ve been in a bad mood is an understatement. I’ve barely slept over three hours a night since then.

“I’ve also been ignoring his calls. Honestly, I’m surprised he showed up here today. Most men would have written me off as a tease and moved on to the next person.”

“You and I know both know Seth isn’t like most men.”

“That we do.” Leia comes strolling into the room, a stern look on her face. “Why else would he come all the way over here to check on you?”

“I thought your dad had a doctor’s appointment in Nashville today?” I mumble, suddenly more interested in my food than looking any of my friends in the eye.

“He does, but Walker called and said Riggs was on his way to pick him up. Apparently, Seth texted and asked him to go out and celebrate.”

“Riggs?” Selina says, as she comes into the room and reaches into my bag, grabbing a handful of fries before winking at me. “Why isn’t Walker coming?”

“Walker has a shift at the station today.” Leia’s cheeks pink slightly as she walks around the table and plops into the only empty seat. “I guess Walker said something to Riggs about Dad’s appointment, and he offered to take him for me.”

Selina rolls her eyes, plopping down into the seat on my other side. “I think Riggs is trying to suck up to a certain someone. What better way to do that than to help take a few things off your plate?”

“There’s nothing going on between Riggs and me.”

“You keep telling yourself that, Leia. Maybe if you say it enough, you’ll believe it, too.” Selina pats her softly on the hand as we break out in fits of laughter at Leia’s expense.

I wrap my arms around my side as I try to control my laughter before I suddenly remember what Leia said. “Wait. Did you say Seth is celebrating something?”

My eyebrows pull down in confusion as I try to figure out what Seth would be celebrating. The last time we spoke, he told me about passing the civil service exam and his plans to become a deputy, but that’s the only thing I know of. I’m sure he’d have celebrated that before now, wouldn’t he? Or are the guys coming to take him out for another reason? A reason I don’t want to know about.

“I can see the wheels turning in your head, Bri.” Leia giggles. “There are no nefarious plans. Walker just said Seth got some good news, and Brady needed an excuse to stalk Emersyn.”

“He didn’t say anything when he was here,” I mumble, rubbing the spot on my chest over my heart.

Just the idea of Seth having something to celebrate and not being included sends my world into another tailspin. I want to know everything about him. I want to be the first person he calls when he has good news, the shoulder to cry on when someone upsets him. I want to be the first person he thinks about in the morning and the last person he sees when he goes to bed at night. It all hits me like a ton of bricks. What a fool I’ve been. I’ve been so worried about protecting my heart that I may have sabotaged my only chance at being happy.

Unimaginable pain shoots through my body at the idea of seeing Seth around town, knowing that I had my chance to be with him, but I let my own fears get in the way. My fear that he wouldn’t want Rebekah, but what I was worried about most was that he wouldn’t want me. The frayed edges of my heart rip open for the second time today.

“I just…” Tears pool in my eyes as all the emotions I’ve been trying desperately to keep in check come bubbling to the surface. “I’m so scared.”

Audrey, Leia, and Selina surround me, their arms wrapping around me in a warm hug as I let all my emotions free. Tears stream down my cheeks as I sob, wishing I could find some way out of this situation. A solution that will allow all three of us to have a happy ending where Seth, Rebekah, and I are a family. The way it all should’ve been from the start.

“I’ve ruined everything and don’t know how to fix it. He’s going to hate me.”

I clutch my friends tightly, biting down on my bottom lip, hoping to quiet the sobs bubbling from my throat. My heart feels as if it’s breaking in two. I want nothing more than to rush out of here and find Seth, to tell him everything, and then it will all be okay, but this is the real world. There’s no way Seth is going to easily forgive me for hiding his daughter from him. I should have told him the first night I saw him. Hell, I’ve had a million chances to tell him the truth, but I chose to keep it a secret. And that secret is going to ruin everything.

I’m just praying that I can hold on for just a little longer until the pain subsides. I yearn for numbness to cut me off from all these feelings that I’m so desperate to forget. “Tell me what to do,” I whine, wrapping my arms around my waist in an attempt to hold myself together.

“I’m going to go turn the closed sign on and call to cancel your classes this afternoon,” Audrey murmurs, pushing to her feet and heading back into the studio.

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