I sit down and breathe deeply, pick up the tossed box from the floor beside the toilet, pull out one of the three foil packets and read the instructions three times over.

This can’t be happening to me.

This can’t be happening to us.

My phone continues to vibrate on the floor, but I can’t take his call. I can’t change his life until I know for sure if my life is changing.

I rip open the packaging holding the pregnancy test, then shakily shove it between my legs.

I cry and pee… and I wait.

***

“Samantha! What have you done?”

My head whips up at my mom’s shrill screaming voice, and my stomach jumps and flips with nausea. She literally storms toward me like she wants to kick me while I’m down, but catches herself before she does, then screams some more.

Snot leaks from my nose, tears create rivers on my face until they join with the snot. It all washes over my lips and into my mouth, and then the taste on my tongue has me sobbing and vomiting more.

I want Sam.

I want him to come and get me now.

He can fix everything, even this.

And he’d never stand over me, crushing the box of leftover tests beneath his feet as he spits on me while I cry and spew. He’d sweep me up, kiss my brow and bring me warm towels. He’d serve me on his knees until I was better, then I’d return the favor anytime he needed it.

“You’re still in high school, Samantha! How could you be so stupid?”

“I graduate tomorrow,” I choke out past the dry retching I’ve been reduced to.

“You’re a teenager!” she shrieks. “You were seventeen, and he was eighteen. That’s statutory rape.”

My head snaps up, no longer tired and defeated, but sure and ready to tear her apart. He’s my mate, and she’s threatening him. “It was not rape, Mother! Sam and I love each other, and I’m eighteen!”

“You turned eighteen three days ago. A pregnancy test does not show up three days after sex, which means he was an adult having sex with a minor!” She turns on her heel again, uncaring that the person she claims to care for is still on the floor as her world crashes around her. “I’m going to talk to your father, then your boyfriend will be getting a visit from the police. And not his daddy, but real police who actually know how to do their damn job.”

I jump up so quickly, my stomach revolts and my head swims, but I grab her arm and tug her around so hard she almost slams into the cabinets. I’ve never touched my mother in anger before, and I’ve never spoken to her this way, but I’m not a meek little girl, I’m a woman with a lot to lose. I won’t give it up without a fight. “You will not hurt him! He’s not my boyfriend, he’s my husband! And he’s the man I choose to live my life with.”

“I don’t care what you think your reasoning for this nonsense is, it’s wrong and illegal. We’re going to see your father, we’re going to the police, then you’re going for an abortion. He’s trailer trash, and I won’t let him ruin your life like this.”

My hand swings out so fast, I don’t even realize my actions until the sting fires through my hand and up my arm. My mother’s face spins from the impact of my slap, and her own hand comes up to hold the injury as her wild eyes skitter around my face. “Samantha--”

“I will not abort my baby! I will not abort Sam’s baby. And I will not lose him.”

I spin on my heel and race out of my bathroom, grabbing my backpack and stuffing jeans and a stick of deodorant in, since those are the first two things I see. I race out of my room and down the hall and stairs, through the living room and out the front door.

I’ve left my phone in my bathroom, forgot my shoes, and I still have vomit in my mouth, but I’m going to find Sam, because he can fix anything.

Even an unplanned teenage pregnancy. This won’t break us. We’ll be fine.

The summer sun beats high overhead, and though it’s still mid-morning and I should already be at school, I head that way because I know he’ll be there. Even without shoes.

My running quickly turns to walking, and my walking turns to vomiting in the bushes and blisters on my feet. My tears continue to fall, because despite my confidence in Sam and me, I’m still terrified of the unknown. I have two-thousand three-hundred, and seventy-six dollars to my name. Well over half of that came from Sam’s overgenerous tipping, the rest from Dixies. My map is still sitting under Sam’s pillow at his house, because he said he wanted to study where we were going. I don’t need it anymore anyway. I remember every tiny little detail I ever marked out on it, and no matter what, I’m going where he goes.

I have my wedding band on my finger and my bank card in my back pocket... and apparently, I have a baby in my belly.

A soft tooting from behind scares me so much, I jump a foot into the air. When I turn around, I burst into a fresh bout of tears as Angelo’s beat up car idles beside me. His smile quickly turns to worry, and ripping off his seatbelt, he jumps out and runs to me.