Page 44 of Boarded Hearts

I chuckle, feeling my shoulders relax just a little. Instead of running for the hills, she appreciates my openness with her. Fucking incredible.“I told you, I’ll always be honest with you, so yes, the feedback I’ve received over the years leads me to believe I’m decent in bed.”

“H-How much feedback have you had?” I don’t need to be a genius to work out that’s a loaded question. She’s asking me for my number and suddenly, the eased tension returns tenfold.

I grip the back of my neck, trying to soothe away some of the discomfort.“A lot… More than I can count.” Which is the truth. I have no idea how many women I’ve been with. If I averaged hookups twice a week, which is conservative given my rookie years, then we’d be looking at a big number, but that doesn’t account for the fact that on occasion I’d find myself with more than one woman at a time. Especially during my darker moments before I started seeing Ben and was drinking more than I should.

I desperately want to change the topic of conversation but work through the pained silence, giving her an opportunity to ask anything more.

But she doesn’t push me any further, and for that I’m grateful.

“I’ve only ever slept with one man.”

My jaw nearly hits the floor. Christ, our pasts couldn’t be any more different, but it means so much that she’s offered up a part of herself in return for my candidness and it fills my chest with warmth.Once again, my mind is taken back to that poor excuse of a man she calls her ex-husband. “Elliott,” I grit out, jaw clenched.

“Yeah.” She blanches slightly, and I wonder if it’s at the mention of his name. “We met at university. I fell pregnant with Jack and by twenty-two, I was married with two children. Darcy followed not long after Jack.”

It’s my turn to blanch. “So, you had two children while still in college?” I try to keep my tone as even as possible, desperate for her not to think I’m judging, which I in no way am.

“Yeah. Elliott said I should just quit school and focus on bringing up the children. In fact, he was determined for me to, but my mum and dad stepped in and helped care for them both, so I could continue studying and finish my degree.”

They sound like amazing parents. The opposite of her douchebag ex.“What about his parents? What about him?”

She scoffs at the mere suggestion. “Oh, no. His parents were high-flying professionals, no time for me. They didn’t like the fact I’d had Jack, never mind Darcy. They thought I’d gotten pregnant to ensnare their perfect son who was bound for great things in finance. They never stopped to think that Elliott was responsible for his actions.In fact, he was—” she hurries out and then stops.

“He was what, Felicity?” My tone is way sharper than I wanted, but the way this is going, I know I’m not going to like it.

She frustratedly gathers her beautiful chocolate wavy hair into a messy bun, securing it with the black elastic band around her wrist.“He told me he wanted more children. He said he wanted to have them young so we could concentrate on our careers. He told me I was it for him, and at such a young age I fell for it. I mean, I guess I was it for him, but not in the way I hoped. Not in a romantic way. As the years passed by, it became clear that I was responsible for bringing up the children, and he was the sole breadwinner.” Her voice is shaky and laced with emotion, and I can tell she’s trying to keep herself together. A lone tear pools in the corner of her eye.

My heart cracks open. I can’t bear to hear or see her upset. On instinct, I pull her into my side so her head is resting on my chest, and it’s then I feel more dampness.

I think she’s finished talking, but then she continues.

“Don’t get me wrong. He isn’t a bad dad; in fact, he’s got a great relationship with Darcy. They’re close. Jack not so much, but he’s always been good to them, providing everything they need. But our marriage? Well, we were on very different paths. I wanted to be a human rights lawyer, and he wanted me to drop my career and be the perfect wife.” She says the last bit in a mocking tone.“There’s nothing wrong with raising children and staying at home if that’s what you want to do. But I wanted something for me. I love Jack and Darcy with all my heart, but women can have it all. The career and the kids if that’s what they want. When it became clear that I was going to continue working, he started setting up interviews for me with his connections. I got shoe-horned into being a PA for Mark Preston. It’s a decent job and the salary is okay, but it isn’t my dream.”

So, he’s a controlling mother fucker, keeping her right where he wants her, and over time, it looks like he wore her down. From time to time, I’ve witnessed that spunk in Felicity, the spark I know she has when she gives me shit. I saw it the moment I laid eyes on her at the stadium, but it’s offset by a woman who lacks confidence in herself and her amazing capabilities. It’s clear she’s incredibly smart. If I had my best guess, I’d say she threatened his superiority. His position as the main breadwinner and head of the house. So instead of helping her with her dreams, he controlled her and clipped her wings.

Dick.

Zach was spot on that night at his place.

“What does he do for a living?” I know he works in finance, but if one cent of my money is invested and benefiting this fucker, then I want out. I want him out of our lives, out of hers. My gut tells me what she’s shared tonight is only the tip of the iceberg.

“An equity fund manager.” Her voice is a little steadier as I trace my fingers up and down her arm. In the last couple of minutes, she’s gone from being tucked into my side to my arm around her back, pinned between her and the headboard as my fingertips dance across her goose-pimpled skin.“One of the best in the UK, but more recently, he’s moved to head of the US equity team, and that’s what brought us to Seattle. He’s been working on a new fund launch. Well, more like overseeing its progress.”

“And then you divorced him, and he moved back home?” I ask cautiously.

“Yes. We divorced eight months ago and that’s when I moved out and into this apartment.”

I look around. Seattle is expensive, but if the financial settlement has been completed, I’d expect her to have a nicer place given the money he earns.

As if reading my mind she clarifies. “This is rented, and I could afford better based on the settlement I got from Elliott, but I want to keep hold of that money, not eat into it too much. My life is so upside down, and with two children still in education, Darcy about to start university next summer, I want to pull my weight. I don’t know what’s going to happen with my job or if my living in Seattle will work out. I could find myself unemployed at some point, so I need to hang onto the savings I have. Besides, the settlement from Elliott was okay, but it wasn’t great.”

I pull back and peek down at her. Anger swelling in my gut once again. “Wasn’t great how?”

She puffs out a breath, staring straight ahead at the cream-colored wall in front of us. “He didn’t want to divorce; I drove the breakup. I hadn’t any real grounds to divorce him other than on no-fault terms, so finally, after years of me growing more distant from him, he agreed on the basis that I settle on a smaller proportion. I wasn’t prepared to go through a battle over money. As long as I had enough to get by and support the kids, I was happy. Money never has and never will mean much to me. Unlike Elliott who is obsessed with it. My freedom and happiness meant more than a higher share of his estate.”

There’s so much for me to unpack and process in what she’s told me. Felicity has given me a window into her life over the last fifteen minutes and since I got into her bed, she’s shared with me details that make so much sense. Why she is like she is, nervous about another relationship. Constantly keeping me at a safe distance. Here’s this playboy NHL hockey star pursuing her, asking for her number, asking her on dates, flirting like hell on nights out. Another successful man with deep pockets.

It all makes so much sense.

---