Page 85 of Every Beautiful Mile

The kids jump up, tossing insults at each other, and file inside in a bubble of laughter.

Once again, Ethan and I are left alone, this time in the dark.

“Alone again, Nel.” He rests his forearms on the railing as he bends slightly at the waist.

I mirror his position. “It appears so.”

“The boys like you.”

I smile. “I like the boys.”

He turns his head to face mine and our eyes hook. “If you weren’t getting in that time machine sitting in my yard and driving away tomorrow, what would you do about this?” He wiggles a finger between us.

“Umm.” My voice shakes. “I don’t know. I try not to think like that because, you know, those are our circumstances. I am leaving tomorrow, and I do live 1,723 miles away, not that I checked the exact distance from your house to mine.” I laugh softly. “I don’t know what I would do, but I know what I wouldn’t do. I wouldn’t let your lips just brush mine without finding out how it would taste to kiss you or fight wanting to lean my head on your shoulder when you sit next to me. And I wouldn’t shy away from looking at you because the fact it feels like you are looking straight into my soul wouldn’t be such a big deal. And I sure as hell wouldn’t be dreading waking up tomorrow because I wouldn’t be driving away and living the rest of my life not knowing any more about you.”

I turn away and fix my eyes on the dark river as forcefully as I feel his still fixed on me. The silence between us is so thick I could hold it in my hand.

“Well, say something already,” I blurt, forcing myself to look back at him.

He moves his face close to mine, so close I can feel his breath on my skin, shaking me to my core like aftershocks of an earthquake. My eyes drop to his lips, and the realization slams into me that I want to kiss him. I want him to kiss me.

I couldn’t summon the nerve to lean in last night, but dammit if I won’t regret it for the rest of my life if it doesn’t happen just once before I leave him.

I lick my lips.

Please move closer. Please. Please. Please.

My mind is chanting the words my mouth isn’t brave enough to say.

He’s close. So close, I smell the wine on his breath as it mixes with his woodsy scent I will forever associate with him, Maine, and summer.

I swallow.

He leans.

Close.

Closer.

My breath stops.

A ring slices through the air.

Once.

Twice.

My phone.

The moment is cut in half.

I close my eyes and pull it out of my back pocket. Poppy’s name flashes across the screen.

I look at Ethan desperately. “I’m so sorry.” Then I answer with a breathless, “Mom? Hey!”

“Penelope! I haven’t heard from you. How was your date?”

Her voice blares through the speaker loud enough for Ethan to hear.

---