Page 44 of Every Beautiful Mile

I’ve always wanted to see Maine, and while it isn’t happening this summer, someday. Maybe.

Maybe someday, I’ll be ready to go somewhere I want to see and think of what it means to want a man to be flirting with me.

When that time comes, I can only hope it takes more than a stranger in a magazine sending a friendly email to get me worked up.

God, I’m pathetic.

***

The kids return, plus three.

“Mom, this is Donny, Garret, and Mike. They’re up from San Francisco for the weekend,” Finn says, introducing them as I stand up.

“I’m Nel.” I smile, shaking their hands. “You boys should stay for dinner. I made enough to feed the state of Oregon.”

I lift the lid of the Dutch oven, and wafts of chili billow out. I know enough about traveling in college to know that money is tight and the food mediocre.

“I won’t turn down any mom’s cooking,” Donny says with a lazy smile.

He has a mop of blonde curly hair and looks every bit the California boy he is.

Around the table with bowls of food, the boys entertain us with stories of their freshman year of college.

“What about you, Ms. C? What kind of stories do you have from your heyday?” Garret asks between bites.

Finn eyes me with doubtful curiosity. Like I won’t be able to deliver because I can’t possibly have had a heyday.

I know youthful secrets are supposed to be locked away with youth—it’s the responsible place to keep them. But the look on Finn’s face says it all—he thinks I’m boring.

I have no choice—I have to prove him wrong.

“Thursday nights always had the best drink specials around USF, and as a poor college kid, I wasn’t one to pass up a bargain,” I tell them, taking a sip of my beer. “One Thursday, 10PM turned into 1AM, and somehow, my best friend and I decided we needed to go to the fountain on campus. It was this shallow pool with these big bull statues. Anyway, she bet me $50 I wouldn’t get into the fountain and sit on one of the bulls for a full minute. Naked.”

Finn groans. “Tell me you did not do this.”

I nod solemnly. “Sadly, I did.”

“Oh, Mom!” Finn groans again at the same time Mike says, “Get it, Ms. C!”

“So, what happened?” Marin asks.

“I was ten seconds away from the minute mark when blue lights start flashing across my naked bull-riding body.”

“Oh my God, Mom, the cops?” Marin gasps, putting a hand over her mouth.

I nod.

“The cops. I got arrested for indecent exposure. Poppy and Grandpa had to come bail me out the next morning because your stupid Uncle Gabe wouldn’t answer his phone. I had to do volunteer hours picking up trash on the side of the road in a neon vest and everything.” I smile at how ridiculous it all was.

“Thanks for ruining my appetite,” Finn says, pushing his bowl away with a shake of his head that makes the California boys laugh harder.

“Your ole mom used to be pretty lit, huh, Finn?”

He covers his now red face with his hands, and everyone howls.

The conversation sets the tone for the rest of the night. Us sitting around the table, laughing, and playing cards.

When I grab the ring hanging around my neck, I think of how much Travis would have loved this. The kids, the stories, the food made over the fire. He would have loved it all. Well, Nel, I imagine him saying, looks like all the hot days you whined about were worth it.

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