Page 144 of Every Beautiful Mile

“Of course.” I roll my eyes on reflex before stopping myself. I refuse to be petty. “I’m sorry. I’m happy for you.”

He ignores me.

“Wait, that’s not actually when I met her. This is kind of embarrassing Nel, but she kind of stalked me first.” He holds up his hands as if to say let me explain. “She contacted me under the guise of needing help, but I know better.”

When he smirks, I take a gulp of my wine then press my lips into a tight line, trying to hide how much I do not want to hear anymore.

“Then she came into the restaurant. On my worst night, actually. I had to work behind the bar, which, before that night, as you know, was my least favorite area to be. I swore to myself I was going to list the damn place for sale the next day because I was so miserable.”

My chin pulls back—behind the bar?

“But in walks this woman, wearing a ridiculous t-shirt and rubber boots that squeaked like ducks, offering to help me.”

At this, he grins, and I instantly feel my heartbeat at every surface point of my body.

“Being at my worst night, I was not in my best mood, but I was mesmerized as she marched around and made everyone around the bar fall in love with her as she made drinks and put me in my place.”

Wait—what?

I’m so still I don’t know if I’m even breathing. Because what he's saying…

“Then, for some reason, she took pity on me and agreed to go out with me on a date.” He leans back in his chair, blue eyes dancing. “I went out on a limb and took her to a farmers market, somewhere I’d been hundreds of times, but I had never seen it quite like that. When I watched her talk to farmers and get excited about herbs, I was a goner. Stupid right? Forty-three years on this planet, and I just needed to find the one woman who giggled about mint. I fell so hard that night I knew I was never going to be the same again. I bought every painting by an artist she liked just so I would have glimpses of life the way she saw it when she wasn’t with me.”

Oh. My. God. My eyes burn like the winter wind is blowing straight through them.

“I knew when I kissed her, I never wanted to kiss another woman for the rest of my life. Even ones who do very naughty things to straws couldn’t compare.” Smug smile in place, he reaches his hand across the table to grab mine, which is trembling.

“Ethan…” I can’t find my tongue.

“Please, Nel, this is getting to the good part. It’s rude to interrupt.”

He shakes his head solemnly as the first tear drips down my cheek.

“Then, I left. Honestly, I was scared. Really scared. That’s not who I was. I went on late-night dates and kept things casual, and this woman screamed serious. But she found me again. This time, wearing this green dress—very similar to the one you wore in the magazine, actually.” He licks his bottom lip slowly before a small smile makes his mouth curve upward. “Between the way she looked in that damn dress and how she once again put me in my place in a room full of people, I was ruined.”

I barely hear the words he’s saying from the sound of my pulse pounding in my ears. Another tear falls and another.

But he doesn’t stop.

“Nel, she has this ability to always tell me exactly what’s on her mind, without reservation or concern over consequences. The things she’s said to me make me feel like I’ve only ever had relationships that never went below the surface. They were all tattoos on the skin until she came in like a blood transfusion and infiltrated every single part of me.”

The graceful single tears are gone, and I am now full-blown ugly crying.

Ethan is here.

The person he’s serious about is me.

He waited for messy, broken, babbling me.

In one quick move, he’s out of his chair, on both knees, on the floor in front of me. When he bumps the table and his glass of wine spills, he doesn’t turn to look.

His hands rest on my thighs, but his eyes are glued to mine.

“I looked up plane tickets to Miami a hundred times since you left, starting the day you flew away. Once, I made it all the way there before deciding you still weren’t ready and flying back home. I wanted to give you a year to figure things out on your own, but when I saw you in that magazine, I knew I couldn’t wait any longer. I would have loved you if you hadn’t left, Nel, but it turns out I loved you even when you did.”

I smile through the tears that keep falling.

“Yes.” My voice is in a thousand pieces. “Yes. To you and this and all the messy work that comes with it.” I run my fingers through his thick hair, smiling deliriously. “I love you, Ethan.”

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