Page 48 of Shattered Vows

“You’re scaring me,” I admit once he’s seated across from me.

“I needed to make sure no one overhears what I’m about to tell you.”

“Still scared.” I chew on my bottom lip while I wait for him to fill me in.

“It’s about what you saw that Saturday night when I wouldn’t tell you what was going on.”

I exhale a sigh of relief though I really don’t know if I should. But just knowing the topic of our conversation alleviates some of my worries. “Alright.”

“I’m going to be blunt about it. I don’t know any other way to be, but what I tell you, you can’t share with anyone else. Ever. Understand?”

He’s serious. I don’t need to ask what the consequences will be if I do. It’s clear to me that they’ll be dire.

I nod. “I won’t say anything.”

He scrubs a hand over his face. “My brothers and I run a sex club out of the basement of the manor called the Ritual Room. It’s pretty much a meeting of the one-percenters of the world, and it runs one Saturday a month. That’s who you saw in the masks—some of our… guests. The club started by my father, and after he died, we carried it on because it gives us leverage and information on other wealthy families, which is never a bad thing if we need to use it.”

And here I thought it was a costume party he was embarrassed to bring me to. This is a whole other level. I sit stunned, trying to make sense of what he just said. He watches me silently while I sort through information and figure out what to say.

I probably shouldn’t be surprised that my mind snags on the fact that Kol is a member of a sex club. Kol has sex with other women in that club, right? The night I saw him…

“Do you… do you have sex at the club?”

He meets my eyes and doesn’t look away. “Yes.”

“Right, of course you do. I mean, look at you.” I motion to him while my stomach turns over on itself. “So the night I saw you, you…”

Jealousy rages like a beast in my chest, clawing to get out. I want to lash out and smack him, push him down onto the ground and pound away on his chest, but I have no right to.

He reaches for my hand, but I tug it away. Kol meets my gaze again with a frown. “I didn’t do anything that night. I tried. I wanted to, if just to prove to myself that you didn’t still have a hold on me, but I couldn’t do it. There’s a ceremony that happens every year, and I’m usually the one leading it, but this year…” He shakes his head almost as though he’s disappointed with himself. “I just couldn’t. Sid took over for me.”

My stomach settles with that knowledge, and I can think a little more clearly. “Everyone had masks on. Why?”

“Each color mask denotes something different. White is a watcher, red is a waiter, and black is a doer.”

“But the mask in your hand and Sid’s mask were gold.”

A small smile tilts up the corners of his lips. “We’re special. We’re the founders.”

I nod, putting all the information together. “I get the watcher thing, but what do the waiter and doer mean?”

“People in the red masks haven’t decided what they’re up for that night. It’ll depend on what opportunities present themselves. Anyone can suggest something to someone in a red mask, and they might decide to join in, maybe not. The people in black masks are down for anything. You don’t have to get their consent for each thing. They want people to do whatever they want to them. It’s part of what gets them off.”

“So which are you?” I hold my breath, waiting for him to answer. I haven’t even had sex. I don’t know what I would classify myself as. I’m so out of my league right now.

He tilts his head. “What do you mean?”

“You have a gold mask. Are you usually in a white, red, or black mood?”

“If you’re asking what I like to do when I’m down in the club, it’s simple. I like to fuck in front of everyone else. I want to be the one to put on a show. I’m an exhibitionist.”

It’s not what I expected him to say. Knowing Kol, I wouldn’t have thought he’d want to be the center of attention, but maybe that’s the only place he feels comfortable exploring that side of himself.

I try to push away the images of Kol having sex with other women while people watch. It’s nearly impossible. How will I ever think of anything else now?

“Why are you telling me all this? I’m glad you did, but I guess I don’t understand what it has to do with me asking you to take my virginity.”

“You should know the man you’re asking, that’s why.”

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