Page 114 of A Deal with the Shadow King

One fiddles with a crank at the bottom of a star-shaped music box and sets it down to the floor. “Dance with me.” He offers me his hand, and I take it without hesitation.

His mask is gone. His gold irises are almost black in the night as he pulls me to the center of the balcony, and we start to waltz together. Music seeps through the air, and it’s the same mournful melody I danced with the king. The same tune. The same pace. The same confident hand at my waist…

“Say my name, kitten.”

“I—One.”

“My real name.” He twirls me around, our hands raised into the air, and I curtsy out of habit.

As we come to a halt, my heart hammers. “I don’t know your name.”

The corner of his mouth twitches. “I think you know. I think you’ve known for a while.”

I close my lids for a moment. Is he saying?—

When the truth hurts too much, or scares you senseless, you bury it. You dig a grave deep enough to conceal it with rubble of denial. I’ve shoveled quite a bit of monstrous truths over the years.

My father’s a cruel drunk, and a cowardly king.

Back when my mother was alive, she let him beat her.

Demeter is a wretched place to live. The entire religious system that praises good over evil—all the while denying us the chance to look at ourselves in the mirror—is a lie.

In my defense, One’s true name hadn’t been obvious from the start. He’s a master at deflection. The signs had been piling up—especially the last few days—but I’d buried them all.

“Say my name,” he asks again, his lips inches from mine. “Say it with disgust if you have to, but I need to hear it from your lips.”

Hot tears roll down my cheeks. “Damian.”

He closes his eyes in a mix of awe and gratitude before opening them again. “I love you, kitten.”

My clenched fists collide with his chest. “I didn’t know—I hoped it wasn’t true.”

A destructive wave of anger topples me over, and the undertow of his revelation pulls me under. Drowning me.

It makes so much sense now. One was stronger than the absentee king. It didn’t add up, but I couldn’t bring myself?—

A sob bubbles up my lungs. “I wanted to believe you wouldn’t have lied to me for so long.”

If One is the king, then everything he’s ever said to me was tainted. Everything I feel for him is based on a lie. For the longest time, I thought he was holding me at arm’s length to please the king. I worried about being forced into bed or into marriage…

“You tricked me!” I punch his chest, but he holds me closer to his torso to keep me from hitting him again.

“I’m sorry, kitten. I had to protect my secret.”

“You pretended to be someone else to gain my trust. You and your brothers. You each take turns playing the role of king, but it’s really you, isn’t it? You’re the one who made the deal with my father.”

“Yes.” He holds me tighter, my body trapped between the hard planes of his chest and his unforgiving grip.

How could I believe our love was real? He’s the reason I’m here. The reason Cece and I are separated. The reason I can’t bear the thought of going home?—

“I’m dying, kitten. We all are.”

The certainty in his tone steals my ire, and I shake my head. “No.”

A soft breath ghosts over my lips. “Our magic is dwindling, and despite the hope I nurtured the last couple of days, the curse still holds strong. But the others are not pretending to be the king.”

“How can you say they’re not pretending? If you are the king,” I breathe.

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