Page 60 of Beachside Kisses With My Enemy

“I guess so.”

“But are you happy, Blake? Surely your dad wanted success for you because he wanted you to be happy. He had his faults, sure, but he wasn’t a cruel man. He loved you guys.”

Am I happy? “I guess I haven’t really stopped to think much about happiness. The last decade of my life has been all about getting to the next thing, you know? Finishing one degree, then another. Apprenticing at the best restaurant I could. Becoming a manager so I could learn the ins and outs of the business. Putting together a business plan so I can reach the ultimate pinnacle—creating a successful restaurant. Maybe getting a cooking show. Dale said he knew some people, thought that could be a possibility.” I close my eyes, suddenly tired at the thought of all I’ve done and all I still have to do. “But it’ll all be worth it when I get there. When the dream is finally achieved.”

Gently taking my empty mug from me, Lucy leans forward and sets it along with hers on the ground beside the swing. Then she turns to face me, one leg tucked under her, one dangling over the swing’s edge. The moon and stars are streaming light onto her golden hair, and her blue eyes are reflecting their shine. “And that will make you happy?”

“You make me happy.” That’s what I want to say to her. The thought surprises me. Does being here with Lucy actually make me happier than the thought of achieving the dream I’ve had for more years than I can remember?

What would happen if I stopped striving? What if I just…stayed here in Hallmark Beach? Pursued something with Lucy? Gave up that “dream” of my own restaurant? Traded it in for something different?

Would I be happy then?

But Dad gave up his dreams for “happiness” and warned me against doing the same. Does that mean I’d have the same regrets?

My head starts to hurt. I blink the thoughts away. “Happy enough, I guess.” Then I tilt my head. “What about you? What makes you happy?”

She tilts her head, and her ponytail swings to the side. “I’m not like you. I’ve never had some grand dream for my life. No steps to follow. I mean, I did intend to go to college, but then your parents died and…”

“You stayed for Mare.”

Lucy shrugs. “And for me. I’m not sure I was going for the right reasons. I don’t even know what I would have studied, you know? It just felt like I was stuck, like I should go do something more.” Her fingers pick at a loose thread on the multi-patterned quilt. “Honestly, I’ve felt like that again lately. I mean, I’m doing my best to keep the restaurant going for Winona, but when she gets back, then what? I go back to being a waitress? But maybe that’s okay. I don’t know what else I’d do, anyway.” She breathes out a sigh. “Maybe it’s enough to just live my small-town life, love my people well, and enjoy the small quiet moments.”

“Small quiet moments, huh?” That actually sounds nice. And I can’t help but add, “Moments like this?”

She smiles, something soft and wistful and warm in it. “Just like this.”

And suddenly, I wish that I was the kind of guy who could enjoy this moment here with her, without worrying about what comes next or what’s expected of me or what I’d be giving up. Because Lucy deserves a guy like that—someone who will stay in the moment with her, soaking up every bit of sweetness and care she has to offer.

I want to be that guy.

I just don’t know how.

twenty

LUCY

Ah. I definitely made the right decision in coming today.

Easing back into my lounge chair on the Seaside Spa’s relaxation deck, I snuggle down into my white fluffy robe and sigh. “This is the life.”

“Right?” April’s in the seat beside me. Today, on Kelsey and Elisse’s birthday, the sky’s painted a vibrant blue, not a cloud marring its pristine surface.

On the other side of me, a spectacular view of Morro Bay opens up, the sparkling waters a deeper color than the world above but still shimmering like it holds a thousand winking secrets below its depths. A huge volcanic rock stands sentinel in the harbor, a guardian that makes this place both unique and beautiful.

My cousin shakes out her red hair and stretches her arms in a lazy way that reminds me of a cat. “That massage was probably one of the best experiences of my life.”

“And you guys had tiny women.” Across from us, Elisse cackles as she takes a sip of her champagne. “Imagine how Mare and I felt with our very brawny male massage therapists.” She nudges Marilee, whose cheeks redden as she pushes her glasses up on her nose. “I’m going to have delicious bruises for daaaaays.”

“Women can be strong too.” Kelsey’s quiet voice pipes up, a rare contradiction to her sister’s more boisterous ways. “My massage therapist was small but mighty.” Wincing, she rubs her shoulder and then tugs at one of the curls resting there.

“To strong women.” Chloe raises a glass of her cucumber water. Of all of us, she looks the most at home in this fancy place, positively regal in her white robe, her blonde, perfectly highlighted hair flowing around her like a crown. This little birthday gathering wouldn’t have been possible without her—she rented out the whole place and paid for every cent, claiming amidst our protests that it was her gift to us for being so kind when she first came to town and needed to throw a last-minute wedding for her brother.

I honestly think we made out like bandits in the bargain.

And hey, any excuse to try to forget my troubles for a day, right? To forget the pressure of the half-finished business plan waiting on my computer.

To forget the sweetness of that moment with Blake on the swing three nights ago. How I nearly begged him to stay—not just out there on the porch with me, but in Hallmark Beach.

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