Page 26 of Floored

She laughed too. "Of course."

The day our nephew was born was so clear in my mind. But in our strange little family tree, he felt like our little brother. Logan and Paige had been married for a year when she got pregnant, and even though Logan had been the legal guardian to four girls, adding a fifth into the mix felt as natural as breathing. We anticipated the birth of their baby like it was the freaking second coming or something.

Claire and I were thirteen at the time, Isabel fifteen, and Molly was seventeen. The four of us stood in that hospital hallway, ears pressed against the door, waiting for the beautiful wailing sound of what we just knew would be another girl. We'd spoil her rotten, the fifth Ward girl, and it was going to be a glorious addition to our girl gang.

Except he didn't emit a wild, loud wail when he was born. He came out clear-eyed and calm. The most peaceful baby that ever existed. When Logan opened the door to let us in, we crowded around Paige—sweat-soaked and wild-haired and holding a tiny little bundle—only to hear the words, "It's a boy."

I looked up at my big brother, and said, "Oh bullshit, it is not."

But the moment I held him, that perfect, scrunched-up, red-faced baby boy, I fell head over heels in love. We all did. He was our baby boy, and the most loved child in existence.

"Remember how we used to fight over who got to hold him?"

Claire smiled. "I got so mad at Isabel that one time she tricked me into setting him down. Didn't she tell me that someone caught sight of Justin Bieber in our neighborhood?"

I laughed, feeling strangely calm. Probably denial, but whatever. "What a bitch."

"She had him for hours that day too. Ate dinner one-handed so no one could take him." Claire fell quiet, and her eyes were heavy on me. "Why the trip down memory lane?"

Have you ever felt like someone shoved a ball of yarn down your throat? That was the closest thing it felt like when I tried to swallow.

"I'm twenty-two with a big, loving family, and a healthy savings account."

"That's all very true."

"I'm going to keep it," I said quietly. There was time to figure everything else out. But if anyone could count on their family to help them through something like this, it was us. Each one of them would walk through fire for me. Just like I'd do for them.

Her eyes filled. "Okay."

"But I still have to talk to Jude."

Claire wiped at her face. "Yeah, you probably do."

"And," I said slowly, "I need to tell Logan. And Paige. Oh my gosh, Paige is gonna fly here like, tomorrow, isn't she?"

My sister smiled. "She might."

Fingers drumming on my leg, I made a split-second decision. "Can I ask you a massive, horrible favor where you don't say a word to any of them?"

"Lia," she said in a warning tone. "You have to tell them.

"I will! Just let me talk to Jude first. I can't handle them all freaking out and asking me what I need and what I'm going to do. I won't have answers to any of their questions."

She conceded with a reluctant nod.

"Thank you. I love you."

"I love you too." She sighed. "Do you want to keep talking?"

"No. I should text him and see if he can get together in the next couple of days."

We said our goodbyes shortly after, and I remained sitting on my bathroom floor for a few minutes longer. How did you even properly try to absorb the magnitude of that discovery?

In one moment, all the choices in my life had shifted, like the clicking letters on a train station arrival board.

My life would quite literally never be the same after this.

Neither would Jude's. I didn't even know if he had any other kids. Or a hidden girlfriend. Or maybe he was crazy. Regardless, he should know. If he chose not to step up, then I gave him the option, and the responsibility was on him.

---