Page 35 of Breaking the Ice

“I'm sorry, my dear, but I have to go to work,” I purr, skillfully evading his arm that tries to pull me back.

“Now? To work? But it's only half past seven.”

“Yes, but before that I have to go home and take a shower.”

“You can also shower here,” he says, watching me as I gather my clothes, leaning on his arm for support. “I promise you; I will wash you very thoroughly.”

“Tempting offer. I'll consider it.” And I mean it. Just the thought of Caleb and me in the shower... our naked, soapy bodies. His hands, exploring and caressing every inch of my body just like last night. A shiver of pleasure runs through me. I have to hold back from climbing into bed with him. “Now I need to get a taxi before I'm late.” With these words, I pick up my black dress from the floor. When Caleb sees it, he sits up abruptly.

“Wait, you want to get into a taxi wearing that?” I look from my dress to Caleb.

“Of course, why not? I did the same last night.”

“That's out of the question.” In one fluid motion, he's on his feet, pulling out one of his Devil's sports suits from the closet. Then he takes me home on his racing bike. The ride is almost as sexy as our morning play. The motorcycle is designed in a way that I'm almost on him. My upper body and breasts are pressed firmly against his back, igniting my libido. I have no idea if he feels the same way, but it really gets me going. Just the scent of his leather jacket drives me wild. As he drops me off in front of our apartment building, I bid him farewell with a kiss infused with my desire. This forces a throaty groan from Caleb, pulling me closer to him. My lips are swollen when he finally releases me and swings back onto his bike. I look into his eyes, seeing raw desire shimmering within them, before he dons his helmet, the dark visor separating our gazes.

Then he starts his engine, letting it roar, and rides away. I stand by the road like an enamored teenager, watching him disappear. It's only when my phone, signaling its low battery, jolts me back to reality that I realize I should hurry. So, I rush up to our apartment, shower, and hastily get ready for work. Just as I'm searching for the car keys, I hear the apartment door. Odd, Dad's first treatment isn't until eleven, I think, making my way to the hallway. There, I spot my father, attempting to quietly lock the door. What's with all this secrecy?

“Dad?” I say, making him jump.

“Heavens, Emma, you startled me.”

“What's going on with you? Where were you so early in the morning?” And then it hits me like a ton of bricks; he's just now coming home. Shit, now I notice how worn out he looks. His shirt is buttoned wrong, and his hair is tousled. And do I smell a woman's perfume on him? No, please, not this. A sharp pain shoots through my chest.

“Dad,” I whisper, unbelievably taking a step back.

“I, well, I was with Bill. He and I...”

“Stop that, don't lie to me.” He sighs and looks at me with exhaustion in his dull eyes. “You were with another woman; I can smell her perfume.”

“Emma, I...”

“No, Dad. I don't want an apology. I want to finally know what's going on between Mom and you.” Again, he sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Alright, but not here. Let's go to the kitchen, I need a coffee.” I nod, leading him through the hallway and sitting at one of the chairs at the dining table. From there, I watch as he fills the kettle and pours himself an instant coffee. In the meantime, Mom's sad face at Christmas haunts me. The call to Dad - he had his phone off. I remember being puzzled by it, since he's usually always reachable. Finally, my father joins me. He can't bring himself to look me in the eyes, keeping his gaze lowered to his coffee cup.

“Your mother and I have a few problems,” he starts eventually. Oh yes, you certainly do, I think bitterly, and I'm pretty sure I know what those problems are. He runs his hand flat over his forehead. “I don't know how to say it...”

“Just say it straight. I'm a big girl and I'll handle it.” Handle the fact that you're cheating on Mom. Although I have to admit, I never would have thought it. Another sigh and then the truth spills out of him.

“Your mother cheated on me with Marco, her tennis instructor. They've been having an affair for about ten months.” My lips form a silent ‘O’. I can't believe what he's saying.

“But Marco... He's your friend...”

“He was my tennis partner and friend for years, yes. Then your mother started taking tennis lessons from him and...” He trails off, rubbing the corners of his mouth. “You can imagine the rest.” I can't believe it! She cheated on Dad, not the other way around! And then she has the audacity to sit in front of me with that mournful expression and whine. I just can't believe it.

“Your mother was my great love. When I found out what was going on between her and Marco, it broke my heart.” The pain in my father's voice brings tears to my eyes. I want to get up and hug him, but I want him to finish his story. “I tried to forgive her. Believe me, I tried. But I couldn't. She left Marco, did everything to make it right again.” He shakes his head, still looking down. “I didn't know what to do, only that I had to get out of Aberdeen. I couldn't bear the city with all the lies anymore. So, I called Bill.” His best friend from college, I think, and I can understand him completely. If I had such a problem, Riley would be the first person I'd call too. “I was lucky; just two days before my call, the masseur of his team broke his arm and the Devils needed someone. It was like a fortunate twist of fate.” I think of Caleb, wondering if it was destined for us to come here and meet him. If I'm honest, it feels that way. Even though the reason for us being here is terrible. “You know the rest of the story. I put my company on hold and moved to Portland with the most important thing left in my life: you.”

“Oh, Dad!” I can't take it anymore, I jump out of my chair and throw my arms around him, crying. “I'm so terribly sorry.” He says nothing, just raises a hand and holds me by the shoulder. I'm his anchor, all he has left, and I had no idea. “I'm here for you, Dad, always,” I promise, sniffling. He nods and rubs his nose with his free hand. I force myself back into my chair but reach across the table and hold his hand tight. Finally, he looks up with reddened eyes. “Bill tried to cheer me up. He took me out and signed me up on a dating app. But it's not for me. I need to find myself again and process the separation from your mother before I dive into something new.”

“And Mom? How is she dealing with all of this?”

Dad laughs bitterly. “She calls me incessantly, sends me texts, and begs me to come back. I had to turn off my phone because she was harassing me."

That's why he was unreachable during the holidays, and she was on the verge of tears. I'll have to talk to her, explain that there's no way back to Dad for her. Sometimes a relationship is irreversibly over. Maybe someone should explain that to that psycho girl Jessica.

“Your mother still holds on to the hope that I'll come back to Aberdeen. But, Emma, that's the last thing I want. I'm done with this city and its people.” Which ultimately means: We – meaning me, his anchor, and him – will never go back there. That's okay with me. I can still visit Mom and Riley on weekends if I feel like it. Besides, Portland offers more than one damn good reason to stay here forever.

We sit together at the table for a few more minutes before I reluctantly make my way to work. I arrive twenty minutes late to my massage room, where Parker is already waiting for his appointment. I claim to have overslept and am relieved that he doesn't hold my tardiness against me. As I warm up, the muscles of the winger for the weight room, the conversation with Dad goes through my head again. My heart is heavy with pity, and I decide to suggest to him that we start looking for a proper apartment. This two-room hole provided by the Devils shouldn't be more than a temporary solution. In a more spacious apartment, my father would surely feel more comfortable and at home. Yes, I think, that's a good idea. I'll get a bunch of newspapers today and go through the ads. After Parker, I have two more massages, which I use, among other things, to think about how we'll deal with Jessica. That issue is much trickier. Just as I'm setting up the table again, my phone chimes. I check and find a text from Caleb.

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