Page 30 of Breaker

When I get home, I strip out of my clothes, grab Breaker's black shirt, put it on, then climb in bed, wishing I could forget. My tears fall.

Such a crappy, crappy day.

I grab my phone and flip it around for a few minutes before sobbing, knowing this is the best way.

I can't fall the way my mother did, I just can't.

Wiping my tears, I write out the message, knowing if I heard his voice, I'd bottle it. Hesitating for a moment, my heart breaks as I press send, then throw my phone on the floor, hoping it smashes. I lie down and throw the sheets over my head, wishing for the ever-growing pain to stop but knowing it would have been a lot worse, like Momma worse, if I stayed any longer.

I squeeze my eyes shut as I sob myself to sleep.

Me: I've been thinking, and I know it's for the best. I'm sorry, but we're over; we never should have been together. I won't change how I am with Noah, but I think it's best if you keep your distance so we don't confuse him. I'm sorry.

12

Breaker

My Goldie: I've been thinking, and I know it's for the best. I'm sorry, but we're over; we never should have been together. I won't change how I am with Noah, but I think it's best if you keep your distance so we don't confuse him. I'm sorry.

For the tenth time, I re-read the message I received a few days ago, not knowing what to do now. I need to smash something while also wanting to get flat-out drunk.

How in the fuck am I going to rectify this?

I knew she was going to use what happened as an excuse; I fucking knew it, yet I was still shocked when I received the text, and now even Noah won't speak to me after Quinn explained that she and I were no longer together—oh, and that the fucker, Andrew, will be in her class every day.

I can't fucking express the pain I feel right now. Noah won't speak to me, because he’s bright enough to know I unintentionally caused the problem, and my girl has ended things.

Life fucking sucks!

"Alright, I'm here. What was so important I had to drop everything at the garage to rush here?"

I ignore Jack’s words and I re-read the text one.

Fuck, I miss her.

"Breaker?" he prods, grunting when I don't answer him. He grabs my phone and makes me sigh.

Reading the text, he growls, "Fuck, she didn't believe the footage?"

I snort, replying, "I think she did, but the problem is that she was already skittish beforehand."

He sighs. "Is this what you wanted to talk to me about? Honestly, man, she hasn't spoken to me since, and before that, it was months since we had a conversation. And, honestly, I can’t explain the reasons why she’s like she is without losing her completely."

I smile but shake my head as I take my phone back, ready to drink myself stupid.

I state, "Actually, despite you punching me," he winces, “I've decided to sponsor you as a prospect." His eyes widen, and I half smile. “It's going to take a lot of work. A prospect has to do grunt work for a year and prove themselves as a brother, but I have faith in you."

He nods, happiness shining in his eyes as he states, "Thank you, Breaker, I, fuck…."

I grin and pat his back as I grab the prospect cut. "You don't need to thank me. How you protected your sister against a brother and just now, not wanting to explain her issues, shows your loyalty. Put this on and get back to work, prospect."

He grins wide as he takes the cut and puts it on, causing the brothers behind me to cheer and make him laugh. He looks at me again and says, "She's stubborn…. Don't give up if you truly love her like I think you do."

He leaves. I sigh, looking at Timmy tipping his chin to the bottle of whiskey, ready to forget for a little while. Noah is at my momma’s tonight—his fucking idea.

Just as Timmy hands me the glass, Lola stops near me and clears her throat.

I snap, "Not now, Lola!"

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