Page 48 of Midlife Woes (Ex)

I’ve known for a long time that she’d come up with a lot of crazy stories to explain away our broken engagement, and I just never cared to fix the story because I wasn’t about to drag my mother through that bullshit. So, she’s probably having a hard time explaining my words to her friends. After all these years, I doubt anyone really cares.

There was a drunken text from Kevin claiming that he’d had the best years of her life and I was only good enough for his leftovers. I simply told him he knew her when she was a child and didn’t understand the first thing about true love, which she now had with me.

I thought since it was so late that jackass would be asleep, but nope, he answered me almost immediately, claiming that she had given him four kids, so he would always have me beat there because she was too old to give me the same.

That kinda stung because I’m a competitive bastard, but not as much as he expected it to, I guess. I just reminded him that I had the money and resources to actually be there with her and my kid, unlike him, who I was told was a mediocre parent at best, who was hardly around to help her with the kids because he was too busy building his business.

I did tell him that I was going to make sure to be a better Dad to his kids than he was before turning off my phone, which I knew would burn his ass. Actually, that was fun. I’ll have to remember to do it more often; at least, that would keep him the hell away from my wife.

She has no idea why I rushed to get married. It had nothing to do with her being pregnant. I wanted to do it sooner because husband has more power than boyfriend or even fiancé. Now that jackass can’t pull that husband card out his ass.

JOLENE

“Do you know what superfetation is?” We were sitting in the doctor’s office, stunned after the ultrasound. We both had a grip on each other’s hands, and I’m not sure either of us had breathed in the last ten minutes, but for different reasons. “Are you saying there’s more?” My voice came out in a squeak.

“Um, this is very rare. Are you sure you didn’t have IVF or take some kind of pregnancy hormone or anything like that?” Look at it; even she’s nervous as hell.

“No, I started perimenopause. Could that have anything to do with it?”

“Um, okay, let’s backtrack. We know there are six, but there’s something else.”

“Yeah, this superfetation thing, but what is it?”

“It’s when you get pregnant twice, at two separate times. There are very few cases of this in the world, and they’re usually found in artificial insemination; I’ve never heard of either of these cases happening naturally.”

“Doc, save all your scientific mumbo jumbo for your research papers; just tell me, are my kids okay?” Those were the first words Damon had spoken since we sat in these chairs.

“Yes, they’re all healthy, heartbeats are fine, measurements are in line with what we have.” I looked down at the little black-and-white image in my hand and down at my stomach. No wonder I’m shaped like a suppository capsule.

I was looking at that image in wonder when she went and said the wrong fricking thing. “I think we should put you on bed rest until you give birth.”

“I don’t feel ill.”

“She’ll be on bed rest, so don’t worry.” I just side-eyed him and wished I could jump the desk and cover her damn mouth because she just kept going and going.

Lady, do you have any idea what you’ve just subjected me to? I’m barely allowed to move around the room as it is. I put my foot down when we got back to the car, and there were more pillows back there.

“I’m not laying down.”

“No, those are to cushion you from any bumps in the road. Why are you mad at me?”

“This is all your fault, you and your womb fucks. Don’t think I can’t see you trying not to laugh; this is not funny.”

The doctor explained the superfetation nonsense as getting pregnant a month apart. One embryo attached to the uterine wall one month, and the next, for some reason, another occurred but not only that, both attachments were carrying three each.

“You know what number I played, right?”

“No, I never watched your stupid games.” I did after we met. I went back and looked at highlights on YouTube, but he didn’t need to know that.

“Number seven, that means we need one more.” I wonder where he planned on getting that one from.

* * *

I didn’t speakto him all the way home; I needed support, so I texted Sheila to get her ass to the house now. The kids were going to be home this weekend as well, but that was still a few days away.

That idiot doctor wanted to make me a test study, but thankfully, Damon shut that down and threatened her with a lawsuit if she even thought of sharing my medical history without my approval.

The poor woman was so excited she was all but jumping out of her skin, but he was right, I needed time to get used to this idea myself. I was still looking at the picture, trying to see where the mistake was, but there was no mistake.

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