Page 101 of Best Served Cold

Dammit.

River called it. I was attracted to Noah.

I liked his big body and stupid piercings and annoying personality. I was attracted to his fluffy hair and strong hands and that mouth that drove me crazy every time he opened it. That same mouth that could bring me to my knees and gave me more pleasure than I’d ever thought possible.

“Is that the only reason?” I asked, needing to derail that train of thought.

“Yeah.” He sighed again. “I just don’t get hungry when I’m like this.”

“Like what?”

“Depressed.”

The inflection he put on the word was the same as someone might describe a mystery turd they’d found in their bed.

“You have depression?”

“And anxiety.” He snorted, but it was devoid of humor. “My brain is all sorts of fucked up.”

“No, it’s not.”

“It is.” He hiccupped. “I’m so fucked up.”

“Depression and anxiety are mental health disorders. You’re not fucked up for having them.”

“Are they mental health disorders? Or is it because I have the devil in me?”

“Unless you have a plug called ‘the devil’ up your ass, then you can knock that shit off.”

He howled with laughter. I had to stop walking to keep him on his feet.

“I’m weak,” he wheezed. “I’m gonna get a butt plug and call it the devil just so I can say I have the devil in me the next time I go home.”

My car was less than thirty feet away. I just had to get Noah to it without dropping him.

“Oh yeah,” he said, his voice laced with pain. “I can’t go home.”

I didn’t ask what he meant because I didn’t want to upset him any more than he already was. I suspected it had something to do with whatever had driven him to drink so much tonight.

“Have you been sleeping?” I asked, my eyes on my car as we inched closer.

“Not really,” he mumbled. “I thought you hated me?”

“I thought I did too.”

“But you don’t?”

“No. I don’t.”

He beamed at me, his smile transforming his face. He was…radiant.

I couldn’t look away. Something about that smile, the pure joy behind it, hit me right in the feels. Flutters and bubbles exploded in my stomach, then trickled up into my chest, and finally to my throat, tightening it to a point I could barely breathe.

Was that what River had been talking about? That startled, on-edge feeling that meant he was into someone?

I’d already accepted that I was attracted to Noah, but did I like him, too?

Gray had said as much, so had River and Nick.

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