Page 61 of Close Quarters

“True. That’s why I call him chipmunk brain.”

“Well, if he can get his chipmunk brain to focus on something long enough, then it means something to him. Hell, the fact that he’s stuck around doing his thing with you for more than a couple of weeks is pretty impressive for him. Maybe he’s learned some focus while he’s been here…or the meds are working.”

“Probably the meds.”

“Maybe. All I know is when he focuses on something, he focuses. And it’s because it means something to him. It’s not just some…new, fancy thing he can play with and throw away. He talks a lot, but when he does shit constantly, without moving away, that’s when he gives a shit, really gives a shit. And he’s been keeping to what he told me from the moment I met him, and he hasn’t stopped since.”

I didn’t want to admit it, but his words left me a little…uncomfortable. I didn’t know if he intended to, but his insistence that Elliot stuck with things he truly cared about also extended to me. It wasn’t like we had sat down and talked about what was happening or what it meant, but that felt unnecessary. We were two guys who happened to be pushed together and discovered a mutual attraction. Sure, there had been some more bonding, but when you lived and slept together, there was bound to be some easing of barriers.

And once it was over? Once we were separated because we got out of this weird probational period, or he was inevitably moved up a tier. Or even when he ended up graduating while I inevitably got left behind? He would go out into the world, restart his life, and there wouldn’t be a need for what we had.

Maybe he cared about it now. I could accept that much as true. But when it came time for him to leave this place behind, to leave me behind, he would find something far better than we had now. I didn’t feel bitter about it…not really. Enough that I envied him that inevitability, knowing damn well that if I achieved anything, it would probably be half as good.

But that’s all we were, convenience and coincidence packaged into one small setting.

“You know,” Dom said, crossing his arms again. “You’re not supposed to ask this sorta shit, but considering what’s going on, I’m breaking that rule…what did you do to get locked up?”

I could have avoided the question, and I had every right to. That was something you didn’t ask, and it wasn’t something I’d gone into detail even with Elliot. Even being asked now sent a flare of anger rippling through me as I stared at him, trying to decide whether I should let the question hang in the air or answer it.

“You’re worried about him still,” I said after a moment.

“Yeah, you still got your temper, even if you’ve got it under control.”

“And if I told you I got here because of my temper?”

“How?”

I stared at him for a moment before clearing my throat. “Beating the shit out of my ex and his best friend.”

Dom leaned back, and I hated that he didn’t even try to look surprised by the news. Instead he looked me over, shaking his head. “Alright…did they deserve it?”

It was the first time someone had ever addressed what I’d done in those terms, and I had to take a moment to take stock. Apparently, it wasn’t only Elliot who was full of surprises. Perhaps something about Dom had drawn him to Elliot and not just Elliot himself.

“They got less than they deserved,” I told him finally, meaning it. “You don’t beat two people like I did and get as small a sentence as I did because the victims were good people.”

“Hey, some people can.”

“Not when you’re some poor kid from a shitty neighborhood. And not when all you did was beat some middle-class assholes who had it coming.”

“True enough. I guess I’ll have to believe you.”

“Believe me, don’t believe me, I don’t give a shit. You can give Elliot shit about it if you want. See how far that gets you.”

“I told him I wasn’t going to start any shit, and I meant it.”

“Alright. Fine…are we done?”

“Sure, I guess I got as good an answer as I’m going to get for now. Just?—”

“Spare me the threats. I’m well aware that if I seriously hurt him, I probably won’t have a chance to walk out of here on my own two legs. Yeah, I got it, big brother, strong, angry man. Gotcha.”

His face wrinkled. “You’ve been spending too much time around E.”

“Yeah, well, I live with the idiot, so what do you expect? Take it up with Mona and Leon. They’re the ones who set things up this way.”

“Yeah, don’t think I’ll be doing that, thanks.”

“So, do you think he’s been lurking around listening to us the whole time, or is he back with the group?”

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