Page 12 of Close Quarters

Grandma T…dead? Fuck, she had been the only person to believe in me when I was younger. Even when I kept getting into trouble, she had always talked me down and tried to make me realize I could do better, that I could be better. Even when I’d been arrested for the final time, she had still talked to me whenever she could, sending me letters and visiting.

And this place…when I was given the offer, she had been so excited. In her mind, it was the perfect opportunity for me to take what had happened and turn it into something good. It was my chance to turn my life around and do something that didn’t involve barely scraping by and not getting into serious trouble. Both her and Mara had pushed me to accept, to see if this place could finally be where my life took a turn for the better. I had done it to make them proud, and now she was gone and would never get to see it.

Shouts and heckling pulled my attention to the crowd I’d passed earlier. The number of guys had grown and formed a circle in the clearing, all looking excited. Something in my mind pushed through the fog, and curiosity made me walk over as a round of wrestling ended. Maybe that was what I needed, to drown myself in something so I could forget what had just happened for a moment.

“Hey, look who showed up,” someone called. “You’re up next, Reno.”

“What?” I asked, senses clearing. “What? With who?”

“Hmmm, hey, new boy!”

“Uh…yeah? Me?”

“You’re the new one, so?—”

A face peered out of the crowd and I wasn’t surprised to see it was Riley. He looked me over, showing no apprehension or concern, just curiosity. After a moment, he smiled and shrugged. “Sure, why not? I could do with a workout.”

A workout? I mean, fuck, I knew the guy had landed himself in prison just like the rest of us, but…I doubted it was for anything dangerous. He seemed like the kind of idiot who’d probably fallen into a money laundering scheme or some other stupid white-collar choice. The guy was full of so much optimism and happiness. What the fuck had he possibly gone through? He had every right to be worried about going toe to toe with me, even in a casual wrestling match.

“Fine,” I all but spat, stepping through the crowd into the ring. “Call it.”

My patience was a thin, fragile wire, but I didn’t have to wait long before the match began. I wasn’t going to waste any time, the new guy was enjoying this far too much as it was, and I was going to make sure he regretted that. I wasn’t going to hurt him, not too badly, but maybe I could get away with roughing him up a bit.

It didn’t take long before I realized I wasn’t going to get my way. Whenever I tried to get a good grip on him, he found a way to evade me. Even throwing myself into it entirely, using my full strength, he managed to stay free of my grip.

Which only made me more pissed and fight even harder. It didn’t matter how pissed I got or how hard I fought, Riley was more evasive and slippery than I would have guessed. It wasn’t until it was too late that I realized I was steadily wearing myself down. After all the hard work I’d done earlier, my strength was rapidly draining, but there was nothing I could do but give the last of my strength to try to bring him down.

Ultimately, I stood no chance, and the last of my strength faded, leaving me open to be pinned in the dirt. The call rang out to announce his victory, and I felt the haze inside me begin to heat again. This was supposed to be a way for me to safely lash out, to take everything inside and put it on something pointless but cathartic. Now, I was left to lie in the dirt, humiliated, spent, and with the ache inside my chest that was full of teeth and claws.

“Fuck this,” I snarled, pushing myself off the ground, ignoring the offered hand from Riley.

“Hey, woah!” Riley said, holding his hands up in an obvious gesture of surrender. “It was all in good fun, right? It was a good match, something to be proud of for both of us.”

Pride? What the ever-living fuck did I have to be proud of? All I’d done was constantly fuck up my life whenever it showed even a glimmer of getting better. Now, when I had the chance to feel good about something, even something as stupid as taking that ridiculous smile off his face, I was left to feel humiliated on top of the guilt, shame, and heartbreak pounding inside me.

And why? All because the absolute fucker cheated his way through the match. He hadn’t once tried to meet me on even ground, resorting to wearing me down and making me look like a dumbass in the process. The pain inside became a roar, and before I knew it, I stepped forward and swung hard.

Fist connected with face, and his smile finally disappeared. In fact, all expression disappeared as he crumpled. A blur came out of nowhere, shoving me aside and catching Riley before he hit the ground. All I could do was stare at the group of guys around me, all staring with wide eyes, some with shock, some with horror, and some with anger.

My hand throbbed as I looked down at it and then back up to see Riley cradled carefully in Max’s arms. It was such a surprisingly tender gesture from someone as rough and mean as Max, and it pierced through the haze. I had lost my temper completely, taken a cheap shot at someone who wasn’t even trying to fight me, and might have just severely hurt someone who hadn’t meant me any harm.

Oh fuck.

ELLIOT

I couldn’t believe what happened or how fast it had gone down. One minute, everything was fine, and the next, Reno completely snapped. It was probably a good thing Max had been there because no one else had the sense to keep Riley from bashing his head on the ground as he fell. Now, all I could do was feel relief as Riley began to stir to life, his eyes looking around blearily as Max softly tried to talk to him.

Before I could understand how the entire disaster left me feeling, Leon was there, and Max had Riley on his feet. The whole thing had unnerved me completely, and I was as shocked as everyone else. No one had seen it coming. I’d heard of fights happening on the ranch, but there hadn’t been an incident the entire time I’d been here, and now this?

It reminded me all too much of the robbery I had stupidly let myself get involved with. The whole thing was supposed to be a quick in and out, scare the guy behind the counter, grab the cash, and get the fuck out. No one was supposed to get caught, and no one was supposed to be hurt.

The first had been ruined because the second was. One of the guys, some asshole called Lee, had decided the old man behind the counter was taking too long. It didn’t matter that the guy was really old and scared out of his wits, his hands shaking so much he’d dumped the cash all over the counter. Lee had driven the butt of his gun between the guy’s eyes, sending him falling in a heap behind the counter.

I would have stood there, feeling the dawning horror of what had just happened, until the cops arrived. But my friend dragged me away, snapping me out of it and making me go. He had almost convinced me to ignore the whole thing until I saw it on the news later. The old guy wasn’t fine. He was in critical condition, having taken the blow to the front of the head and then the back when he’d fallen.

It took me three days after that, three days I was ashamed of before I did what needed to be done. I turned myself and everyone else in the group in. The robbery and assault were bad enough, but they tacked on attempted murder as well. The last was dropped for me because I’d agreed to have my testimony used, and it turned out the old guy was up and kicking, even now, a few years later.

Things could get out of control so fucking quickly sometimes. I knew that better than anyone. And yet, despite everyone moving away from the group and the rage I felt, I hadn’t missed the way Reno had just…stared. There had been no triumph or more anger, no horror or sadness. There was just a blank stare as he looked down at what he’d done.

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