Page 20 of Alexander's Heart

“Yeah, good idea, Cuddy, I want you to coordinate the team, step up while I’m needed here, you’re in charge once you’re rested.”

“Roger that, Chief.”

I look to Doc and ask, “You all good, Doc?”

“Yes, Chief, go get cleaned up, eat and spend some time with your girls. I got this.”

I nod and leave the cold sterile environment, walking along the corridor I run through what I managed to get out of Trickle. It seems as if he and his cousin were groomed by their fathers and grandfather to choose Elizabeth and Caroline. It makes me fucking sick; some people have warped fucking perceptions on who should be included in society and what their legacy should be, it makes my blood boil.

It doesn’t excuse Jay or his cousin Rob’s behavior, they’re weak for continuing on this path their family elders mapped out for them. People can choose a different path in life; they can step away from toxic family and create a life of their own and choose a better way to live.

For all I’ve seen in the worst parts of the world, this type of thing happening in my own country is horrifying and pisses me the fuck off.

Standing under the hot water feels like heaven, on my hellish soul. My mind is twisting like a tornado over all that’s happened in the last three days, and it’s one of the toughest missions I’ve ever had to endure.

When it’s your own family being threatened, held captive and hurt, it hits you like a freight train when everything goes quiet.

I used to appreciate the silence when I returned home from missions, now my home is filled with the voices of my girls, which is my driving worse when deployed, to come home to the sound of my girls living life... happily.

All I want is to hear Lily’s voice, to know she is truly okay, to have her giggling with Alexa, reading my princess bedtime stories in her melodic reading voice. To have her back doing what she loves, baking her treats for everyone to enjoy, walking in Central Park and reading. My girl loves the simple things in life and the universe couldn’t have sent me a more perfect love, an all-consuming love, one I would never recover from if my angel doesn’t pull through this.

Then there’s my babies, two of them tucked safely in their amazing Mommy’s tummy, I can’t wait to tell Lily the welcome news when she wakes up. Alexa is going to be so excited; my little girl has always wanted a brother or sister. She used to tell me to hurry Andrew up. I allow myself a genuine calm smile because I feel it in my heart that Lily will be okay and wake as soon as she can. My angel has only just begun living, and our story has many more chapters to enjoy.

I’m dressing when I hear the faint voice of Alexa speaking with Lily.

‘Mommy, it’s me, Alexa. I dwawed you a pictuaw today. It’s a wainbow with wots of cowows! I hopes it keeps you heaw with me on da gwound and not in da stars. Daddy said you wiww wake up as soon as you can and then you wiww see it. I miss you; I’s want to cuddle in bed weading a stowy. I just… miss you so, so much. Can you heaw me, Mommy? I wuvs you to da moon and back.’

Listening to Alexa’s one sided conversation with Lily has pain filling my chest, because I know she’s worried about her going to the stars like her parents, and that alone breaks me. I step out of the bathroom quietly and walk to Alexa sitting on the edge of Lily’s bed. Lily looks better visually, she’s not sheet white anymore because her face has some color back, her beautiful ivory complexion.

I gather Alexa in my arms and sit on the chair next to the bed and she slowly turns in my arms and grabs my face.

“Hi, Daddy, I was just tawking to Mommy.”

Alexa leans in and smells me, “you smewws so good now, and I’s gwad the icky face haiw is gone.”

I chuckle, because my princess really hates when I have a beard and isn’t shy about speaking her opinion.

Alexa’s smile grows. “Do you think Mommy can heaw me tawking to her?” She asks with a concerned look on her sweet face.

I lean in and kiss Alexa’s forehead, “Yes, Princess, I do, she may not remember all of what is said when she wakes up but she can hear you my little love.”

“Good, I’s keep her company. I’s not touching Mommy, I’s vewy caweful.”

“I see that, how do feel? Is your pain, okay?” It’s been a good twelve hours since her last morphine injection.

Alexa nods enthusiastically, “Much bettaw, Daddy. I’s just having the runny medichin now and my chwest feels not so twight.”

I smile and kiss her forehead once more, “That is very good, it means your body is healing and will be back to normal soon. How about we go get some clothes and have a special lunch?”

Alexa turns her head to look at Lily, “I don’t wants to leave Mommy, she needs me here.”

I turn her back to face me and cup her little face with my hands this time.

“Mommy knows that you need to eat, play, and watch a movie, read. Doing the normal things, you enjoy and being a kid because that’s how you make Mommy happy baby girl.”

“Okay, but can we’s come back heaw aftaw, I think Mommy woud wike to watch Fwozen with me.”

“I reckon she would too, let’s go have something decent to eat and grab some supplies. Then we can come back and spend time with Mommy, how does that sound?”

---