Page 35 of Fractured Devotion

The doctor placed his bag down with a sense of purpose, beginning a methodical examination. Just as he wrapped up, the familiar click of claws against wood filled the room. Falcon, loyal as ever, nosed his way to my side.

“Hey, buddy,” I greeted, ruffling his fur affectionately as his tongue played across my face in a sloppy canine kiss. “I missed you, too. Have you been a good boy?”

Massimo’s laughter broke through the moment. “That ‘damn dog’ hasn’t left your side once,” he said, the term of endearment hidden under his mock annoyance. “Took a bribe to get him to even consider a walk with Vincenzo.”

“Thank goodness you’re awake.” Vincenzo dropped into a chair with an exaggerated sigh. “That ‘demon dog’ isn’t going home with me, no chance in hell.”

“You’re doing well, but take it easy for now.” The doctor, all professional, interjected with a cautionary note. “No adventures, no driving until we run some more tests.”

But my mind was elsewhere, already racing ahead.

“That’s not on the cards. I need to get dressed, need to see Carmela,” I declared, turning to Catarina with a questioning look. “What happened to send her off the deep end?”

“Why don’t you tell him, Doc?” Catarina deferred to the doctor. “You’ll be better at handling the barrage of questions I’m sure he’ll have.”

The doctor’s eyes met mine, measured and serious. “What did they already tell you?”

“Nothing,” I replied, shaking my head. “I know nothing.”

“Carmela was dosed multiple times with heroin laced with fentanyl. It’s amazing it didn’t kill her. As you know it made her lash out without fully comprehending what was happening. In addition, she had multiple lacerations on her body—cuts made with the intention to maim, not kill her. We treated her for the drugs ingested and stitched up the wounds that needed it.”

“Okay… but how does this account for her current state?”

“We ran several tests, Alex. For her sake and yours, we needed to know if she’d been exposed to anything. Fortunately, she hadn’t been sexually violated—and according to her, you were the only man she’d been having unprotected sex with… Shocking as it was, Andrei Sloski was paranoid and always wore a condom. When the results came back, Carmela refused to acknowledge them. She was in extreme denial. Not that her refusal to accept her physical state had anything to do with what happened a week ago. That was a direct result of the drugs.”

“She couldn’t face the idea of a blessing amidst the tragedy.” Celestina’s touch was a tender anchor on my leg. “She thought if she dismissed it, it would somehow be less real because you were still lost to us,” she explained, her eyes brimming with empathy.

In a reflex of confusion, I tangled my fingers in my hair, squeezing my eyes shut against the looming revelation. “For the love of— just say it,” I pleaded, my voice a tortured whisper.

Catarina’s voice broke as she delivered the truth, a heavy tremor in each word. “Carmela was expecting Alex. She was carrying your child.”

The word ‘pregnant’ hung in the air, a beacon of lost hope as I fixated on Catarina. “You said ‘was,’” I echoed hollowly, a sinking feeling in my gut.

“The drugs, the ordeal—it was just too much. She lost the baby,” she said, the finality of her words cutting through the room.

As tears blurred my vision, I looked at their faces, etched with shared sorrow.

“And she’s shouldering the guilt,” I murmured, more to myself than to anyone else.

“Yes, she is,” Celestina confirmed, her voice barely a sigh. “She’s torturing herself, believing the miscarriage was a retribution for what she endured, for the dire measures she took to stay alive. When she lost the baby, it was as if she lost a part of her soul. You weren’t there, and the one piece of you she had left slipped away, a piece she never let herself believe in. In her heart, she’s convinced she deserved this pain.”

“That’s insane.” I wiped my face, “She did what she did to stay alive.”

The realization that Carmela had been grappling with all of this in solitude cut through me. She’d already fought through a nightmare that most people couldn’t even imagine, and now, here she was, shouldering the burden of another dark and twisted ordeal. It was a catastrophe beyond her control, one she couldn’t have halted, even if she had seen it coming from miles away.

“Where is she now?” The urgency was raw in my voice.

Massimo looked uncomfortable for a moment before responding, “She’s at Harlen’s place.”

The response struck a nerve, and anger surged through me like a firestorm. “What the fuck?” I barked, my body reacting before my mind caught up, propelling me to my feet.

“Ease up,” Massimo interjected, raising his hand as if to physically dampen the tempest of my reaction. “I get where your mind’s going, but you should know Harlen was the one who got her out to you guys. Whatever went down at that place… well, they’ve kept it to themselves. But it’s him she sought refuge with, him she trusted enough to turn to when she couldn’t handle being here anymore.”

“She was running from me,” I said, a bitter realization dawning, my hand instinctively raking through my hair in frustration. “I have to see her.”

“Go shower and change into something clean.” Massimo’s suggestion was directive, simple, and to the point. “I’ll wait,” he said, rising to his full height with a purposeful nod toward the bathroom.

“Falcon… we should bring him along,” Massimo added, a thoughtful tilt to his voice. “Carmela became attached to him while she sat with you, and from what I could tell, the feeling was mutual. Might make things easier for her, seeing a friendly face.”

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