Page 74 of The Summer Swap

“It was hard.” Cecilia took a deep breath. “And I can’t believe I just told you that. Your mother doesn’t know, and you must never tell her.”

“Why?”

“Because she simply adored her father. He could do no wrong in her eyes and I don’t want to be the one to change that, particularly now when it’s all in the past anyway. All she has is her memories. She has a right to keep those.”

It seemed from Todd’s expression that he didn’t agree, but he nodded anyway. “Whatever you want, Nanna. I’ll respect whatever you decide. Did my grandfather come back here?”

“I don’t know. For many months our relationship hovered on the brink. I couldn’t see past the betrayal. If I hadn’t loved him so much it wouldn’t have hurt so badly but I did love him, and the hurt was almost unbearable.”

Love, Lily thought. Who needs it?

“But you stayed together.”

“We did. And I don’t regret that. But for me the affair changed something. Before that I’d loved him totally. Unreservedly. But the affair took something away that never came back. If you break a pot there will always be a fracture line, even if you manage to glue it together again. There will always be that area of weakness. And I’m not sorry we stayed together, and I don’t regret the life we had—but it wasn’t the life it might have been.”

She glanced back at the cottage. “It was two losses. I lost him, and I lost this place that was very special to me. I remember wishing he’d had his affair in a faceless corporate hotel somewhere. Anywhere but here. He promised me he’d sold it but after he died I discovered he hadn’t. Another lie. At first I assumed he’d been using it, but then you told me no one had stayed here—” she glanced at Lily “—and I realized that whatever his reason for keeping it, it wasn’t that.”

“Maybe he thought that one day you might come back.”

“He knew I wouldn’t. Any mention of the place made me think of her. The cottage is forever associated with betrayal for me. I don’t want to feel that way, but I do.”

Lily felt her heart ache. “Perhaps he didn’t sell it, because he couldn’t. Because the place meant as much to him as it did to you.” She thought about it. “What if we were to get away from the past altogether? What if we could make it feel different? I mean really different, not just a few pots and a bookcase.”

“Different how?”

“This was your place, the two of you. It reminds you of your relationship. But what if we make it your place. What if it’s all about you?”

Cecilia’s eyes shimmered. “You’re kind, but a coat of paint isn’t going to erase the past.”

“I think Lily is intending to give the place much more than a coat of paint, Nanna.” Todd was on his feet, fingers in his hair. “I think it’s a brilliant idea. Let’s do a walk-through.”

“A walk-through?”

“See the place with fresh eyes. Decide what could be done.”

“But—”

“If you don’t like our ideas, you can say so. The position is spectacular, but the cottage is tired. It hasn’t changed at all, has it? So let’s change it.” He walked back into the living room and Lily followed.

She was excited that he agreed with her idea, but unsure how to proceed.

She glanced over her shoulder, but Cecilia was still standing on the porch looking at the ocean.

“Maybe we’re wrong to push her.”

“We’re not wrong. You saw what I saw. You saw how much she once loved this place.” Todd was restless, his gaze skimming over the building.

Lily thought about the paintings. “We need to make it feel different. But how?” She was starting to think she’d been a bit ambitious suggesting it. Cecilia was right that a coat of paint wasn’t going to be enough. “The walls look horribly bare. I suppose we could find more paintings. Different paintings.”

“Not paintings.” Todd tilted his head, measuring the distance to the ceiling. “Bookshelves.”

“Bookshelves?”

“Floor to ceiling. It will transform the place.” He walked the length of the room and back again, muttering to himself. He seemed to have forgotten she was there.

Lily cleared her throat and he turned.

“What?”

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