Page 15 of The Summer Swap

Despite her loneliness and her confused feelings toward Theo, she knew she probably wouldn’t have let the relationship with Jeff develop into anything had he not pursued her so relentlessly. It had been flattering, at her age, to be irresistible to someone. And it wasn’t just that he was interested in her physically, he was interested in all of her. He encouraged her to talk about everything and anything. He wanted to know every detail of her childhood, particularly her memories of her father. No one else wanted to hear her memories of her father, but Jeff did. He listened attentively and asked endless questions until she’d ended up telling him things she’d never told anyone before, even Theo. And if occasionally she felt a brief shimmer of worry that he knew so much about her, she dismissed it. Trust was all part of intimacy, and true intimacy was a gift.

She read the message again.

I’ve arrived. Can’t wait to see you.

Their messages were usually neutral and safe, in case someone else caught a glimpse.

And what was he doing asking Winston about The Girl on the Shore? He’d already asked her about that painting, and she’d told him it didn’t exist. Presumably he’d been establishing his credentials to avert any suspicion.

Was she in love with Jeff? Maybe. Or maybe not, it was too soon to know. But she did know that he was exactly what she needed right now.

He’d started pushing to spend more time with her, which was flattering. But even if she could conjure up a plausible excuse for an overnight absence, where would they go? The idea of checking into a motel as Mr. and Mrs. Smith and paying cash didn’t appeal. It felt sordid, and Kristen was determined never to be sordid.

But that problem was for later. For now, she had an event to host.

She refreshed her lipstick, took another look at herself in the mirror and then almost jumped out of her skin when her phone rang.

Maybe she wasn’t cut out for this. She hadn’t actually embarked on an affair yet and already she felt alternately giddy and guilty. It was like the impulse you had to eat fast food, even though you knew it was bad for you.

She grabbed her phone and saw Theo’s name on the screen.

Theo never called when he was working and it was unsettling that he was calling now, when she’d been thinking of another man.

“Theo? I wasn’t expecting to hear from you. Have you been operating?”

“We lost the patient.”

“Oh.” Kristen had a momentary image of a patient running undetected around hospital corridors, even though she knew that wasn’t what he meant. “I’m sorry. I hope you’re not blaming yourself. If you couldn’t save the patient, no one could.” She believed that. The fact that Theo had turned out to be a semi-absent husband was in part due to the fact he was fully present in his job.

“His car was hit side on by another car. The driver was looking at his phone.”

She knew how difficult he found this part of his job. When someone died, no matter how severe the injuries, Theo felt a sense of personal failure. He’d told her once that he had to believe he’d succeed, or he wouldn’t have the confidence to try. But she also knew that he had a perfectionist trait that made him single-minded. Hannah shared that trait. It was both admirable and aggravating to those around them.

“Do you want to talk about it?” The question was a formality. She knew he wouldn’t want to talk about it. Theo never talked about it, just as he didn’t want to talk about how lost she felt without her father. Theo didn’t like talking about emotions, his or other people’s. His cure for a bad day was a large gin and tonic and half an hour on the sofa with his headphones and Brahms. “Theo?”

“Maybe.”

Maybe? Kristen couldn’t have been more surprised if he’d announced that he was giving up surgery and joining the church. “All right.” She trod cautiously on unfamiliar territory. “I’m listening.”

She tried not to think about Jeff waiting for her downstairs, or the other guests, or all the things she still had to do.

“Not over the phone. I’m on my way to you. I should be with you in an hour. We’ll talk then.”

On his way? “You’re coming here?” It was hard enough to get Theo to show up somewhere when he’d made a commitment, but in all their years together he’d never surprised her by showing up when he wasn’t expected. He hadn’t shown up when her father died.

“That’s why I’m calling. I know it’s not the perfect time, but I just want to be near you and the kids. If that has to be with a crowd around us, then that’s fine.”

Kristen’s shock (when had Theo ever said I just want to be near you and the kids?) was followed by a rush of panic as another message arrived on her phone.

Drinking champagne in the rose garden.

Jeff was drinking champagne in the rose garden. Jeff was waiting for her.

And her husband was about to leave the hospital and join them.

“I thought you couldn’t make it?” Kristen thought frantically. This was not a situation she’d anticipated. “You don’t have to come. I’ve already told my mother you won’t be here. We understand, Theo. Your work is important. More important than us.”

“That’s not true. And if ever I needed a reminder of that, I’ve had one.” His voice sounded strange. Thickened and distant and difficult to understand.

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