Page 103 of The Summer Swap

“I’m just going to the edge of the beach, that’s all. Far enough so that I don’t wake everyone up. I’ll be out of reach of lobsters and sharks.”

“Fine, but I’ll wait for you on the porch anyway, just to be safe.”

He dressed quickly and together they crept downstairs.

Leaving Todd on the porch, Lily walked almost to the water’s edge, far from listening ears.

For the first time ever, she didn’t feel nervous about the call she was about to make. She knew what she wanted, and she knew what she had to say.

She couldn’t spend her life trying to be the person other people wanted her to be. It was exhausting and it made her miserable. She needed to live the life that felt right for her.

She’d been trying to work out how to fix the problem with her parents, but talking to Todd had made her finally realize that it wasn’t her problem to fix. It was theirs. They were the only ones who could change the way things were.

She pressed the button on her phone and waited until someone answered.

“Dad? It’s me.”

21

Cecilia

“Florence?” Kristen paused and anchored her hair against the breeze as she studied her mother. “You’re going to spend the winter in Florence?”

Above them the sky was a perfect azure, shot through with tiny wispy clouds. The sea sparkled in the sunlight, the surface calm and still.

“And Rome. Seth does it every winter. He rents somewhere and lives like an Italian for a few months. It sounds perfect.”

“Has he always done that?”

“Since his wife died. He told me that trying to live the life they’d lived together was too painful, like stumbling along being only half of yourself. So he built a new life. One that wasn’t full of things he’d once done with Sonya. His journey inspired me. And it gave me some of the answers I’d been looking for in my own life. This past year I feel as if I’ve been frozen in time. I had no idea how to move on.”

“I wish you’d told me.” Kristen looked tired, and it was obvious from her face that she hadn’t slept well. “But that was my fault. I didn’t make it easy. I should have asked. I wish I had.”

“And I wish I’d asked you about Theo.” The words needed to be said, but life was too short for regrets and guilt, she knew that now. Regrets were useful only when they provided a springboard for change. “Both of us were struggling. Let’s agree to forgive ourselves, and each other, and move on.”

“Yes.” Kristen looked startled by that suggestion and then relieved, as if that option hadn’t occurred to her. “I’m still adjusting to the fact that my father wasn’t the man I thought he was.”

“He was.” Cecilia slipped her arm into her daughter’s, and they strolled along the beach. “He was all the things you thought he was. But he was also human. He made mistakes and bad choices, as we all do. I think loving a person means accepting all of them, even the parts you wouldn’t choose.”

“I think you’re an impressive woman,” Kristen said. “You always have been. It’s just that I never really thought about it. It was just who you were. You get on with things, no matter how hard. You find a way through. You’re an inspiration. Dad was lucky to have you, but he obviously knew that.”

“Thank you.” Of all the things Kristen had ever said to her, this touched her the most.

“Still, it’s a lot to take in. But I will. Life doesn’t stand still, does it? As you say, we have to move on.” Kristen glanced over her shoulder to Dune Cottage. “What’s next for you, Mom?”

“I’m following Seth’s example and changing things.” She paused, unsure how her daughter would react to her next piece of news. “I’m going to sell Lapthorne Manor, Kristen. It’s too big for me, and it’s part of my old life, not my new life. When I’m there I can’t seem to envisage any life other than the one I lived with your father.”

“But what about your beloved gardens?”

“The gardens have been my life’s work, but I’m happy to hand them on to someone else to enjoy. It’s time.”

Kristen stopped walking. “Where will you live? Here on the Cape? At Dune Cottage?”

“I haven’t decided. Not Dune Cottage, although I have some ideas as to what I might do with that. I’m probably going to stay with Seth until winter and help him out in the gallery. Like him, I enjoy supporting new artists. It would make an interesting project for me. And when the season is finished, I’ll travel with him. After that—well I’ll see how I feel.” She was already excited about the possibilities. “Todd gave me a planner for my birthday, and I’ve already started to fill it with things I want to do. We’re going to visit galleries and gardens, drink good red wine and strong espresso. I’m going to improve my Italian. And we’re going to talk and enjoy each other’s company.” Cecilia hoped it hadn’t been a mistake to tell her daughter so soon. “Are you upset that I intend to sell the family home?”

“No. I’m a little surprised, that’s all.” Kristen pulled on the sweater she’d looped around her shoulders. It was early morning, and they had the beach to themselves. “It’s a lot to take in. This place. The truth about Dad. Meeting Seth. Todd and Lily. I feel as if my world has totally changed.”

“Todd and Lily.” Just thinking about them made her want to smile. “How do you feel about that development?”

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