Page 98 of The Island Villa

She slapped her hand over her mouth. Love you. Love you? Where had that come from? Had she really just said that? And did she even mean it?

She let her hand drop, stunned.

Yes, she did. She loved Oliver.

Not as a friend. As something so much more.

Her breathing felt shallow and unsteady. For years, she’d been waiting for a love like her parents’ to come along and all the time love had been right under her nose and she hadn’t recognized it. She’d been waiting for something different. Looking for something different. And she’d missed the real thing.

Oliver.

She thought about the way he made her laugh, and how he stayed up late listening to her if she was upset even if he had to get up early the next morning,

And then she thought about how her life might be if she found a small apartment of her own as her mother had suggested. No more long lazy evenings sprawled in the garden sharing a bottle of wine, surrounded by the sweet smell of grass and the hum of bees. No more waking in the morning to find a mug of tea by her bed where he’d left it before going to work. No more arguing about who was cooking dinner, and who was choosing what they were watching on TV.

A life without Oliver would be like a pizza with no cheese. A swimming pool with no water. It would always feel as if something important was missing.

She felt a tiny buzzing in her brain and a swelling in her chest and then an explosion of something that could have been panic.

She’d always thought it was friendship. But now she knew it was so much more than that. It was love.

She was so focused on her shocking discovery that it took her a minute to realize he was silent.

“I meant that I love you as a friend, obviously.” She croaked out the words, tried to inject some laughter, hoping that she hadn’t ruined everything, and was relieved when he responded.

“Sure.” His voice sounded strange. “I know what you meant.”

She’d freaked him out. And it wasn’t surprising. She was freaked out too.

Oliver. All this time.

He cleared his throat. “Do you want me to come, Cass? I can fly out if you need me.”

Her insides warmed. She needed him badly, and he was offering to come so why not?

She opened her mouth to say, Yes, I need you, and then she heard a sound in the background.

“Is someone there? Do you have company?”

There was a pause. “Suzy,” he said. “Suzy came over.”

Suzy. Suzy with the hair like silk and perfect teeth.

If her heart had felt bruised before, it was crushed now.

What was she going to do? What was going to happen when she was back home? She and Oliver shared a house. They ate meals together, went for drinks together. He’d be with Suzy and she’d have to smile when she bumped into Suzy in the bathroom in the mornings, and say good morning in a cheery voice, and not mind when she dried her skimpy underwear on the washing line in the garden.

“Hey, Cass?” Oliver’s voice came down the phone. “You still there?”

“Yes.” Her voice was a croak. “Still here.”

“And sounding weird. Did you swallow a bee?”

“No.”

“You’ve taken to smoking fifty a day?”

“Still no.”

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