Page 44 of Maddest Temptation

“Shhh.” I widen my eyes commanding her to behave. My cheeks were already blazing, and I was mortified that I’d kissed Cassio when it was supposed to be the last thing we did. I was supposed to hate him!

I didn’t know where to start, there were parts of my life which Marie didn’t know. Parts like Arabella Moretti’s death, my engagement to Paolo, and my relationship with Cassio. I’d kept those things hidden in an attempt to lessen the hurt. Except four years had gone by and the wounds were still festering. Why couldn’t I move on?

“Cassio and I used to date… in secret,” I confessed.

Marie’s eyes widened. “Oh, GOD.” Her jaws dropped. “Wait, why in secret?”

“I was already promised to Paolo, our engagement had been set, but then I met Cassio, and I wasn’t going to be married for years, and I thought...” I sighed deeply. “I thought nothing was going to happen.”

Marie nodded in understanding. “Except it did.” She pointed out.

“We fell in love, or I did,” I explained. “We dated for two years, and Cassio made me believe he was going to fight for me.” I shrugged like it didn’t matter. Like what I was saying wasn’t like stabbing myself with a sharp knife. “Then one day he broke up with me.”

“You’re shitting me.” Marie was in shock.

I shook my head. “He said he didn’t love me and that we were a mistake.” To this day I can still remember the words Cassio had said to me. They had been tattooed in my brain, and I was never going to forget them. Not even if I tried.

“What an asshole,” Marie pointed with gusto. “He dumped you just like that?”

I shrugged again. “As I said, I was promised. I thought he loved me enough to save me, but apparently he didn’t, and I was too blind and stupid not to realize it.”

Marie looked at me as if I were a lost puppy in need of a home and some cuddles. She reached for my hand and squeezed it. Then suspicion showed in her almond-colored eyes, and she dropped my hand. “So why did he kiss you?”

Good question. Why? Why did Cassio kiss me?

“Does this have anything to do with that guy at the party?” Marie inquired connecting the dots I hadn’t seen myself. “Was he jealous or something?”

“Of me?” I laughed. “Please, as if.” I stared at the yellowish colored tea and wracked my brain trying to understand what happened that night. “It’s hard to know,” I confessed. “One moment he’s acting nice, and then the other, he’s pushing me away.”

“Hot and cold?”

“Cold. Freezing cold.” I remembered the way he looked at me, always with those cold pine-green eyes. Except, that day he kissed me, there had been heat in them, so much heat it burned my insides.

A strange ache settled in my heart. I couldn’t allow that. “It’s been four years. I should have forgotten him,” I said to the tea, not being able to look at my friend.

“Clearly you haven’t,” she pointed out what I didn’t want to admit myself.

After psychoanalyzing everything about the kiss, Marie allowed me to change the subject. I was tired of trying to understand why he’d kissed me, or why he saved me from Gianluca, or why he saved me from jail, or why he took me to his house? Or why he did all those nice things? If he hated me so much, why was he always there when I needed someone?

Cassio had let me go all those years ago, and it was my fault for bringing him back into my life once more, but I was supposed to be a one-time deal. We had agreed on never seeing each other again.

Yet here I was, with a massive headache, as I’d tried to figure out what to do next. Staying away from Cassio was the only choice I had. I just prayed he’d stay away from me as well. I couldn’t deal with another problem right now, and Cassio was certainly the largest of them all.

12

CASSIO

The headache started at the back of my head and traced a path all the way to my eyes. They were going to pop out at any second. These meetings always took longer than expected. That was what happened when all of my underbosses joined under one roof to discuss business. Today was no exception, hours had gone by, and it felt like I had aged years.

To me, this was always the most boring part of the job. My father always made sure I was present for these meetings, even when I was a child, and barely understood what these men were saying. Barely understood what it was to be a Mafiosi. I’d sit on the floor behind his chair playing with my Hot Wheels and pretending I was elsewhere.

Sitting in a chair for hours was torture. My body was always craving to move, stand, and pace. My mind was always working faster than it should. Thoughts sprouting at a million miles an hour. I had to learn to be still, to sit and listen, and then listen some more. To pretend that I gave a shit to most of what these men said.

“We cannot allow the Russians to take our territories,” Luca, one of my younger underbosses said. “We have been controlling things in Minneapolis so far.”

“Things in Oklahoma have been dire,” Carlo, the underboss of Oklahoma intervened. “Our cargos have been stolen before we can receive them from Texas.”

I sighed, it had been going back and forth since the beginning of this meeting. “How many have they taken?” I asked Carlo.

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