Page 126 of Forfeits

“Hey, hey. It’s okay. It’s all right now.”

The intense events from the day had caught up to me, and I felt a resurgence of my grief—at the death of the kitten, at the close call with Daniel’s parents wanting custody of Lucy and at the unfairness of his early demise. I knew this would happen every now and then, and by now I knew it wouldn’t destroy me and that the best thing to do was to ride it out until I could breathe again.

“I’m sorry,” I said, pressing my face into his shoulder.

“Don’t be. I’m not afraid. I can handle it.”

“Thank God. Because it’s probably going to happen again.”

“Your grief is a part of you. And, do you know what it tells me?”

“What?”

“That you’re capable of so much love. That you’re not scared to love.”

I sniffled into Aiden’s shoulder.

“But what if… What if I can’t do it again? What if I’m scared to…to love someone, again?”

Aiden pulled back and cupped my face, gazing hard into my eyes.

“Are you scared to love me?” he whispered.

“Terrified,” I said. “I’m fucking terrified.”

He smiled, and kissed my forehead, then my nose, then my mouth.

“I kind of think this is a done deal, the thing between us.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I think it’s too late.”

I smiled, trying not to start crying again.

“I can’t help loving you, Fletcher Marin. I love you when you’re Lucy’s Dad, I love you when you’re Daniel’s grieving spouse and I love you when you’re on your knees for me. And I can’t see that ever changing.”

Chapter Twenty

Pearls Before Swine

“Oh my goodness, look who’s back!” Robin squealed as Aiden and I walked into the gaming parlor at Maverick Molly’s a couple of weeks later.

Somehow it was the beginning of December, and now there was a small artificial Christmas tree in the corner by the piano, decorated with strings of popcorn and dried orange slices, as well as a handful of pretty ornaments—and lit with soft white fairy lights. There were more fairy lights strung in random places, giving the cozy room a festive vibe.

“Hello, Robin,” I said, admiring him in his Victorian finery. “You look lovely.”

“Don’t I always?” he asked.

“Absolutely,” Aiden said, taking a seat at an empty table and gesturing for me to join him.

“Lucy talks about you constantly,” I told Robin. “I think she has a crush on you.”

Robin grinned. “Her and half the men in this city. Please. That’s not news. I hope she knows it’s pointless.”

“Because you’re gay or because she’s twelve?” I asked.

Robin grinned. “Let me tell you what I was doing when I was twelve…”

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