Page 3 of Safe With You

Parting, Mom kept her hands on Katie’s shoulders. “It’s so lovely to see you, but I’m so sorry about your grandma.”

Katie’s lips trembled with a forced smile, leaving Ethan’s chest feeling bruised.

Dad greeted her next, in his quiet but compassionate way, before Ethan stepped in again. “I told her she could stick with us so she wouldn’t have to be alone today.”

“Oh, yes, of course.” Mom put her arm around Katie’s shoulders like a mother hen gathering a lost chick under her wing.

He had no doubt that every member of his family would defend her if the occasion called for it.

Ethan’s mom, Evelyn, gave the best hugs, which was just what Katie needed. Grandma had been her only source of hugs since Drew wasn’t a hugger. She wasn’t sure what she would do without someone to offer that for her. Right now, however, she soaked in how Ethan and his parents enveloped her in their care, just like when she was a child. She struggled not to break down into tears of gratitude for their presence. It was an answer to a prayer she had not even thought to pray.

Before she could properly thank them, more familiar faces wove into their midst. Katie recognized Ethan’s two older siblings right away. His brother, Joel, hadn’t changed much other than having filled out with maturity, and his goatee was no longer patchy. His eyes crinkled with a smile for her. Katie had always envied Ethan and his siblings for having him as an older brother.

Ethan’s older sister, Becca, stood a pace behind Joel. While Katie had tended to follow Ethan everywhere, she’d spent many hours playing Barbies and dress-up clothes with Becca and Megan, the youngest of the Hart siblings. Becca’s once long hair now ended in a short bob around her chin, and her smile didn’t quite match Joel’s; something sad buried deeply in her eyes that Katie guessed went beyond Grandma’s passing.

They greeted each other, and Joel and Becca extended their condolences. Though Katie enjoyed seeing them, grief flooded back to the forefront of her mind, and her gaze strayed to the dark casket at the front of the auditorium. The sight stole her breath away because, one way or another, it marked the end of life as she had always known it.

When her mom had gotten pregnant in high school, and her father had wanted nothing to do with either of them, Grandma had been there. She had been the one to raise Katie in those early years when her mom spent more time bouncing from one guy to the next than learning to be a mother. She’d been the one to love Katie and offer her a small taste of heaven when the rest of her life had been hell. Now, she was gone.

Katie startled when Ethan’s hand settled onto her shoulder.

He glanced into the auditorium. “Do you want me to go with you?”

Her voice stuck in her throat, unable to make it past the lump that had once again lodged there, but she nodded. He remained at her side as they walked into the auditorium and down the center aisle toward the casket. Katie’s heart beat in her ears. This would be the first time she’d see Grandma since she’d passed. The two of them had talked only five days ago during one of Katie’s almost daily visits to the nursing home.

She braced herself and set her gaze on her grandma’s still form. A wave of both heartache and relief washed over her. She had been terrified that nothing would be as Grandma wanted it since Mom had insisted on making all the arrangements. It had left Katie with no choice but to pray and hope for the best. But Grandma must have left behind instructions and done her own preparation because she was clothed in an elegant burgundy dress and wearing her signature red lipstick. If nothing else, this brought some comfort. And yet, seeing her body made it real. Grandma was gone and would never be part of Katie’s life again on this side of eternity.

She choked for a breath and tried to tell herself Grandma no longer suffered from the effects of the stroke that had plagued her for four long years and now enjoyed a reunion with Grandpa, the love of her life. But it still meant Grandma would no longer be here to give her wise counsel or celebrate any future life events with her. Would no longer be here to share in the day-to-day struggles and triumphs.

Losing the battle against her tears, they overflowed Katie’s eyes and poured down her face. A sob broke free from her chest, and then another. If only she could be strong like Grandma, but she couldn’t grasp that inner strength today. Not while such grief rose to swallow her whole, and the broken little girl that still lived deep down inside her lingered so close to the surface. Grandma had been that little girl’s shelter and safety.

Katie hunched her shoulders as another, deeper sob gripped her. Then she sensed Ethan and looked up. Tears glistened in his eyes.

“Come here.” He reached for her, drawing her into his arms.

She curled up against him, letting her head rest on his shoulder, and he wrapped his arms around her in the fully enveloping hug she needed to help hold her together. The tears flowed faster now, the hitching sobs more frequent. She was probably soaking his suit jacket, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, he gently rubbed her back and murmured, “That’s it. Just let it out.”

For the next couple of minutes, Katie did just that. She let the loss and the pain pour from her heart and into her tears. At first, it frightened her. She had always buried pain, hiding her deep-down vulnerability so it couldn’t be used against her. But despite Ethan being hardly more than a memory from her childhood, she felt safe to be vulnerable for those brief couple of minutes. And safe was something she’d rarely felt, even as an adult.

Eventually, the tide of grief subsided. With a deep breath, Katie pulled away from Ethan and swiped her hands across her face. Sure enough, a dark splotch marked his shoulder. Before she could apologize, he reached into his pocket and handed her a pack of tissues. In all her worrying about today, she’d forgotten to grab the tissues from her suitcase on her way out this morning.

“Thank you.” She tugged one out and dabbed her eyes and cheeks.

His lips lifted with a hint of a smile. “There are more in the foyer.”

She nodded, wiping her nose. Ethan opened his mouth to say something more, but his gaze shifted past her. In that split second, his expression changed, going cold. An icy dread seized Katie’s stomach, traveling through her limbs with a tremble. Instinctively, she knew the reason for his reaction. She sucked in a quick breath, scrambling to recall the encouragement and advice she had received from her therapist, and turned.

Sure enough, Mom and Grant stood a few paces away. Her brother, Christopher, lurked behind them, his messy dark hair and too-pale skin giving him the appearance of a broody vampire from some young adult novel. The way his gaze wandered, not focusing on anything, suggested he was either drunk or high. Or just Christopher being Christopher. It was hard to tell with him.

But she shifted her focus back to her mom, doing everything she could to avoid meeting Grant’s eye. As usual, Mom’s dress bordered on scandalous with its deep V neckline and too-short skirt. She didn’t even have the decency to tone things down for a funeral, and heat prickled Katie’s cheeks. Mom’s dirty blonde hair needed a root touch-up, and her dark eye shadow gave her too-thin face a skeletal quality. Would she ever stop trying to look like she did in high school?

“Mom,” she murmured.

What else was there to say? Their last phone conversation a couple of days ago had been heated, and Mom had gotten her way as usual. They’d never shared enough love to cry with each other over Grandma’s passing.

Now, she dared dart a glance at Grant. Tall, trim, silver-haired, he was always the distinguished, successful gentleman on the outside. But she knew all too well that his charming smile, outgoing personality, and impeccable manners were only a facade. Today marked the first time she had seen him in the past ten years—ten years too soon.

Though she tried to avoid it, their eyes met, and even though he wore a pleasant expression—warm even—a shiver traveled down Katie’s spine. She clenched her fists, crushing the tissues as she struggled to breathe and not shrink away.

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