Page 4 of Secret Pregnancy of a Cosmic Union

She is carrying my child but sometimes she treats me as if I am a nuisance. I know that I am far from it, and I understand if she is hesitant to allow me to be a part of her life because she doesn’t know how to feel about it, but I can assure her one hundred percent that I’m not going anywhere, and I would hope that she didn’t try to push me aside like I never meant a thing.

I know fated mates mean so much more to me than it does to her, and I hate the fact that this is just how it had to be. I hate the fact that it ends up being this way because I already find myself being so protective over Harper and I don’t even think she realizes it. She wants to keep me hidden, for what I do not know why, but I do know that there’s no way that I’m going to just be able to take this when it’s clear to me that she’s not sure what she wants either. I can see it in her eyes how she feels towards me, and it makes my stomach churn. Maybe this wasn’t the best idea.

I’d like to think that I’m the only one for her, but it is becoming more and more clear with every passing moment that it is definitely not the case. I’d like to make sure that she becomes a grand part of my life and to make sure that she is happy, but I already know that there is no way it’s going to happen with things the way that they are now. I kept telling myself that it’s just going to take time and why would she want me around unless she did actually feel something but there’s honestly no reason for her to feel anything towards me.

I’m just the alien Rogue that got her pregnant.

Today though, Harper took me outside of her home for the first while to get me clothes because she said that I needed them. I stand protectively next to her and although Harper is a taller woman, I still tower over her. I see human men, women, and children looking at me with shock, as if they have never seen someone like me before. Maybe they haven’t and I’m not going to say anything to that though because there’s no reason to. I just keep my gaze ahead because of what Harper has said to me and the best thing for me to do is to make sure that I don’t end up losing everything to her.

I won’t let her win in this sense. I won’t allow her to bring me down just because she wants to hide her feelings towards me. She can lie to me all she wants, and she can try to say that she doesn’t feel anything towards me, but I know it is not the case. I know she feels everything, and I know how I feel about it. It’s not an easy feeling, let me tell you there, and it’s the kind of feeling that makes your stomach churn with knots and makes you wish that you could do something else about it.

I growl at any man who gets to close, seeing how Harper looks up at me curiously but I don’t want her to know what I was doing. I don’t want her to get mad at me because I know that she might end up getting upset if she learns what I had done. I know it’s not right for me to go ballistic on someone like that but what I do know is there is no way in hell that I’m going to just allow things to happen this way without getting something else in return. I’d like to think that I’m going to go down an alright road, but I guess there’s only one way to find out.

Licking my bottom lip, I stick close to her as we go through a clothing store, finding it quite humorous as she tries to find things to fit me. I don’t know how she thought that this was going to all be alright because there’s just no way that it could happen that way but I’m going to just take it one step at a time. Fiddling with my fingers, I look around cautiously as I try to decide what I’m going to do next. I’m not completely sure what road I’m going to have to go down, but I do know that if it is by Harper’s side, I think I will be okay.

“Are you alright?” She suddenly asks me, making me look down at her curiously, “I’m sorry, you have just been plastering yourself to my side and I can’t help but wonder if you’re alright. Can I do anything?”

I don’t know why she is being so kind to me, making my heart practically skip a beat as I watch her carefully. I know that this could go in the wrong direction than what I needed it to, but I just know that I’m going to be alright. Since I have decided not to answer her entirely, I just nod my head and allow her to go about her business, doing one thing at a time. She smiles softly at me, a weird look that I’m not used to because why is she looking at me like that?

I don’t think I want to know.

Chapter Six

Harper

I don’t know why but it’s like my body has come to life every time that I am around Elarix, and it is driving me crazy. I don’t know if he just knows what he is doing or if he knows how he is making me feel but I’m not going to stand for it for much longer. I might want him, and I might end up admitting this, but I don’t know what his problem is. He keeps getting really close to me, making me feel like my entire body is going completely haywire and like nothing is going my way. I know it might sound pretty selfish and redundant to just talk to him the way that I have but there’s no way I’m going to be able to just let him do whatever he wants and go with it.

I keep trying to tell myself that either way, I think it’s going to be alright, and what’s honestly the worst thing that can happen? No one has made too much of a serious comment about him and I think the good thing is that they are going to probably never say anything because they know what kind of woman I am, and they know that I’m not going to put up with it. I hate the fact that they keep talking to me but eyeballing him, noticing his muscles and shit.

I know he is very handsome but that doesn’t mean I need people gawking over him like I’m not standing here. I honestly shouldn’t feel so possessive of him, but I do. I want more from him, more than I have ever wanted from someone in my entire life and it’s driving me crazy. I keep thinking that maybe I’m doing this the wrong way, and I should just make him mine but how would that go? Would it honestly be something that I want to do? Would he even want me? There’s no reason for him to want me like that and I honestly wouldn’t be able to blame him either.

After everything that I have done to him, it’s becoming more and more clear with every passing day that I’m not a hundred percent sure where this relationship is leading. I could be completely wrong, and I could allow all of this to just get thrown in my face, but I don’t believe that Elarix is that kind of person. If he actually is, I’m going to be really surprised because he doesn’t make me think that he is that kind of person.

I know the best fit for me in this moment is to take a chance and allow my heart to take me wherever it wants to go. I can’t be completely certain of where it is going to lead, already knowing that this could turn around and bite me in the butt but what else am I going to do about it? I mean, this whole thing could turn out to be a disaster, but I can’t help but want more. Maybe I am crazy.

Fiddling with my fingers, Elarix trails behind me, carrying the bags from everything that we just bought. I don’t know how I didn’t just clear out the entire store, but I bought everything that I thought he would need while living with me. It does get cold here and he didn’t have the right clothing. I don’t think that I’m worrying about him, I’m just thinking of the long-term consequences if he ended up getting sick on me. He didn’t say anything about it though, just thanking me before going back to his business.

It made me look at him curiously because I honestly didn’t understand why he is so sweet to me or even why he has just decided not to allow him to get thrown into this pit of nothingness. I know how it might sound and I know that I could just be overthinking this or it’s the hormones raging through my body right now, but he is really hot, and I find myself craving him more and more with every passing second. I don’t know how he even managed to get a hold of me the way that he did but I don’t see myself going anywhere anymore because why should I?

I honestly think that I’m going to just have to allow myself to love him and cherish him the best way that I can but why do I feel that way? I shouldn’t feel so strongly about a man that I’m not really in a relationship with, but I hate even thinking that way. It makes me feel like I am thinking wrong and that can’t be the case either.

I just watch curiously as he walks past me to hold open the door, definitely feeling like I’m the only girl for him. I’d hate to see him treat anyone else as good as he is treating me in this moment, I might end up going crazy if he did. I don’t even know why I feel like that, but I keep going back and forth in my head, trying to decide what to do about it. I already know how I feel and what I want, but what does he want?

I guess I will just have to find out…

He sets the bags on the ground, going to put them in the wash. It’s always good to wash the clothes you buy; I had already made that very clear to him. I see how he just listens so perfectly, making me lick my bottom lip because why does he have to be so perfect? As if he is hearing my thoughts, he stiffens and looks at me curiously, his eyes darkening.

That’s all it took for me to jump him.

I leap straight into his arms, wrapping myself around him before I kiss him. He stiffens almost immediately, as if he is debating on kissing me back but he must have decided what he wanted from me because almost instantly after that, he is kissing me like his life depended on it. Soft, shuddering gasps escape me as I feel like my entire body has been lit on fire and I’m loving every second of this. I know how much I want him, I know that I need him, and I can’t stop this fire of desire coursing through my veins. I know what I want, and I know what I’m going to say to it as well. I don’t give a damn what ends up happening to me because I know that I’m going to be alright.

His hands move along my body, caressing me and touching me in the best places possible. I know that the best thing about this is how I just feel content with everything happening between us and I know there is no way in hell that I’m going to let anything stand in my way. If that ended up happening, I’m not even sure what I would do or even how I would do it. I just know that this man, he is it for me and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I can see by the look on his face that he’s feeling the same way.

He carries me over to the bed, not giving a damn about the bags and for that I am thankful. He lays me down on the bed, but he does look a little unsure.

“Can we be doing this?” He asks me curiously, “what about the baby?”

I didn’t think to ask about it, but I took his hand either way, knowing that I can’t do this, “I’m sure it’ll be fine. Just don’t be too rough and I think it’ll be alright.”

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